Also, apparently, he was unable to quit being a knight.
✦ ✦ ✦
“Hell yeah! Another day of working hard at rebuilding!”
“With all the knights lending us a hand, we gotta put our backs into it!”
“All right, then, let’s start by clearing away the debris over there!”
Several days after the Crossroads of Lemuria, the people were toiling diligently to reconstruct the imperial capital, which had been heavily damaged by Vortigern’s inhuman powers. The people had been partly inspired by the efforts of the hero Crow, the powerful Iris, the peerless young beauty Vita, and Hypno (whose gender was still unknown), all of whom had taken charge of leading the work.
“Be careful, my people! Do not injure yourselves! You’re all my greatest treasure!” a young girl’s voice called out, drawing cries of agreement and appreciation from the crowd.
Indeed, she who rallied the people and instructed them on the reconstruction was an iconic figure. A new idol of the imperial capital, on equal footing with Crow and Iris.
Which is to say...
“I, Zilsonia, am with you! Lend me your strength! Let us endeavor together!” Are you fucking shitting me?! Why do I have to break my back alongside these pathetic plebeians?!
This beautiful young girl’s true identity was that of the old bastard Zilsonia, thought to have died!
Damn it! How did this happen?! Die, all of you! Just drop dead!
Just as her (his?) pathetic old man brains seethed, another gorgeous young girl spoke up.
“Spoken like a true former emperor, Your Majesty! You’re such a hard worker! ♡”
“Oh!” said Zilsonia. Ack!
To be perfectly honest, this second girl had a former identity of her own. Her sickly-sweet tone might’ve sounded like sarcasm coming from an older man. In a young girl’s voice, however, it seemed alluring...
“I, former Prime Minister Superbius, have fallen for you all over again upon observing your shimmering, sweaty visage, Your Majesty! ♡” Serves you right, trash boss from hell!!! ♡♡♡ Cute little bastard!!! ♡♡♡ Choke on dust and die, please!!! ♡♡♡
Indeed, she (he?) was Superbius, the old jerk of a prime minister who had once served under the old jerk of an emperor.
“Superbius! You have come to our aid too!” Asshole! Don’t look at me while I’m working! Die in a fire!!!
“Of course! ♡ I, too, have turned over a new leaf, and will pour my sweat and tears into serving the people! ♡” Anything to watch your sorry ass suffer from up close! Ha ha ha!!!
The two young girls exchanged seemingly amiable smiles. The refreshing sight soothed people’s hearts, though the hidden reality was just sordid and messy.
Their long-standing work partnership had lasted over twenty years. Having collaborated for so long, the two could insult one another with mere eye contact.
“Take my hand, comrade! Let us work hard and walk the path of light together!” Die, die, die, die, die!!!
“Yes! We have been blessed with a second chance at life! Let us devote ourselves to the people!” You die! You! Die, die, die!!!
In other words, they were both garbage. A pair of old bastards engaging in mental fisticuffs.
As for why the two girls (???) now looked like this, well, this was the doing of the golden scepter that had killed them.
“Let’s do this! Together!” Dammit! Why did even Superbius get resurrected?! Stupid scepter!
The scepter, which Zilsonia had identified as a people-melting weapon, had a name—Tiresias, Staff of the Heavens.
In Greek myth, Tiresias was a man with an exceedingly curious past. One time, he flippantly struck a pair of mating snakes with his staff and was consequently turned into a woman.
Incomprehensible. Childish and beyond understanding, that Tiresias.
Either way, the staff that had been passed down through the royal family could make this garbage scenario come true, since its ridiculous power was to make people who were killed by the staff reincarnate as the opposite gender.
So the dissolution of the bodies of the emperor and the prime minister had just been the first step in the process of refashioning their bodies.
“Okay! Let’s move that rubble together!” Hurry your ass up, Superbius, you bastard!
“Yes! Leave it to me! ♡” Don’t boss me around, Zilsonia, you bastard!
Thus were they reborn from a pair of turds into a pair of cute turds.
Incidentally, the emperor had told a spur-of-the-moment lie to those around him. “The moment I died, the gods appeared before me and said, ‘You have repented, and for that we will show you mercy,’ so I was allowed to be reborn!”
And then, the prime minister, who was sneakily observing the emperor pretending to be righteous, appeared and added, “I, too, have turned over a new leaf, and so they told me, ‘You as well! Live your new life with virtue!’”
And thus, the two old men, who had neither repented nor turned over a new leaf, achieved the blatantly false mythical status of “former sinners, bestowed with a divine miracle for their heartfelt wish to atone.”
Indirectly, the lies of these two (young) old bastards had improved public order. Even amidst the chaos of the imperial capital, there’d been no riots in the prisons, and all the inmates had begun earnestly seeking to repent, so that they too would be turned into cute girls. It was chaos.
Dammit! I had to grovel for my status as a virtuous man! How dare you get it with no effort!
Oh, Your Majesty, you’re looking at me with such defiance in your eyes! Should I let them know you tried to kill me? ♡
Grrrr!
Despite the two having narrowly escaped death, Emperor Zilsonia was terribly dissatisfied.
Crow, whom he hated so much, had NTRed his aging mother in front of everyone. And even after Zilsonia had endured this travesty, he’d still been forced to curry flavor with the young man and his people to establish his new position as a “virtuous” man.
Compared to him, Superbius hadn’t sacrificed anything at all. And he was guilty of flippantly sending Crow after the black dragon alone.
Despite this, the former prime minister was doing just fine. Zilsonia’s rage was never-ending.
Grr! I hate you, Superbius, you bastard! And now, because I turned into a child, I’m too small and my legs are too stubby and I have to work twice as hard as you! You’re a teenager, aren’t you?!
Hah! Probably because we’ve aged in reverse! Since I was a little younger than you, now I’m a little older!
Superbius smiled softly. She(?) was just happy to be alive.
It’s just as I shouted when you were about to kill me. I love my son, Alithlai. Everything I did, from buttering you up to enduring in this society, was to leave my son a large inheritance and high position. And that dream came true.
With the emperor’s sins having come to light, the prime minister’s sins too began to surface. Accepting responsibility, Superbius had naturally resigned as prime minister.
And now his son Alithlai, a capable administrative officer, had been appointed to the position in an interim capacity.
“I will never allow my son to take part in any corrupt practices. He must become an excellent addition to the new system,” Superbius whispered to the former emperor.
Zilsonia clicked his tongue. “How vexing! Why is everything going so well for you?!” he whispered back.
As the two old jerks continued their catfight, the Lemurian Empire was steadily making progress along the path of light.
Preparations for the new system, with Eldia as the ruler, were underway. Measures against the terrorist organization, Wanpurgis, were being devised.
Superbius chuckled. I’m sure my son will be a very hard worker. And then all that will be left is for him to find a beautiful bride. He’s always been a late bloomer, but hopefully he’ll find love soon.
Do I look like I care?!
Unlike the emperor, the former prime minister thought he’d gotten off relatively easily.
But the truth was not so simple. Elsewhere, a beautiful young man sought Crow’s advice.
“Sir Crow. As you seem to have abundant experience with women, I would like your advice. You see, I seem to have...reacted.”
“Hm? Reacted to what?” Also, what abundant experience?!
His name was Alithlai von Teese—the former prime minister Superbius’s beloved son.
Though he was a charming young man, who at a first glance looked like a young woman, he was quite the prodigy and had a brilliant mind.
In tears, he continued. “See, my father’s now a girl in her midteens, and I, um, I reacted like that to him!”
Crow sputtered.
“What should I do, Sir Crow?!”
How the hell am I supposed to know?!
And thus, unbeknownst to the prime minister, his son’s life was being twisted in a very strange direction.
Poetic justice, in a way.