“Let’s go, Asuka!” I yanked on her hand, and we bolted across the campus. As we neared the athletic grounds, distant cheers—likely celebrating the day’s climax—filled the air.
We were too late, I realized with a sinking heart. But it was the outcome that mattered. My absence was a blow, but Sayaka and Rikka—Sayaka, who had trained her heart out, and Rikka, with her innate athleticism—should’ve been able to pull off a victory, even with replacements.
Reaching the field, I grabbed the first student I could find. “Who won? Who won the kibasen?” I pretty much yelled at the poor girl.
“Huh? Oh, um, team Red did,” she replied.
Team Red—that was us! “Thank you,” I exhaled, a wave of relief washing over me. But then, she added an unthinkable caveat to her words:
“Team Blue won overall, though.”
My veins ran cold. “What? But you just said team Red won the kibasen!”
“They did, but team Blue placed second. The point difference wasn’t enough to overtake them, so team Blue clinched the overall victory.”
The realization of what had almost certainly happened crashed down on me with chilling clarity. A seemingly minor tweak—rearranging our lineup to fill in for Asuka and me—had thrown off our team’s original roster, upsetting the placements for the day. Despite our best efforts—despite winning the kibasen—we couldn’t bridge the point gap, and…we lost.
It was all because I chose to prioritize Asuka’s future, embarking on this reckless detour for what now felt like selfish motives. In doing so, I’d jeopardized our main objective. I’d let down Nonoka. Nonoka had let down Miyu. The entire narrative had unraveled, and the blame rested squarely on my shoulders.
Reeling from the impact of my decisions, my legs shook and I staggered, nearly falling. “Are you okay?” the girl asked, her voice tinged with concern.
I looked up at her. Nothing came out at first. Then, “I’m…fine. Thank you for telling me.”
Keeping my composure in the eyes of all those present, I took Asuka’s hand and we made our way to the stands. A hush had fallen over our section, the atmosphere heavy, as if in mourning. We approached quietly, and the closer we got, I could hear the sounds of sniffling.
“I’m so sorry!” a girl, one of Nonoka’s friends, cried out. She was in tears, clutching at Nonoka. “I’m so, so sorry! If I just snagged that bandana off team Blue, they would’ve been third, and we could’ve won! It’s all my fault!”
My heart clenched tighter—we were one bandana short from victory. She was shattered, blaming herself, yet…
If she only knew the truth.
You’re not to blame. You did everything you could. Nonoka is lucky to have someone like you by her side. Me, on the other hand…
I had ruined everything with one self-centered act. If only I had done better… No, if only I had done nothing at all, things wouldn’t have ended up this way. Team Red was supposed to win, it was literally how the story was going to unfold. All I had to do was ensure it stayed that way. My job was to ensure it stayed that way. Instead, I’d turned the tide against us.
I bit my lip. The worst part was my silence—I couldn’t own up to my mistakes, offer comfort, or vow to make amends. I could only sit there, stewing in my own regret.
Then, Nonoka’s voice broke through the tension. “Mizuki, it is not your fault!” she declared, her words meant to soothe another but they reached me, stirring a bittersweet solace within. It was strangely comforting that Nonoka was consoling her, almost as if she were doing it in my place, easing a bit of my burden.
But did I deserve that release? Did I deserve to distance myself from the blame, to pat myself on the back and say oh well, we tried! as if I were just another bystander processing the loss?
No, I didn’t. But the fact that I thought I did, even for a second, meant that I was weak. I bit down harder on my lip. It was then that Natsumi, Nonoka’s other good friend spotted me. She marched over, her eyes blazing, and all eyes swiveled to us.
“Where were you?” Natsumi demanded.
My mind immediately ran with all kinds of excuses, but I stifled them. I had screwed up, wasted everyone’s time and effort, but I would at least own that—as the villainess.
My resolve hardening, I adopted a look of indifference. “I believe Sayaka informed you all beforehand?”
“That’s your excuse?!” she shot back in disbelief. “You know we tried really hard to adjust the roster because of your absence? We made it work, yes. But we wouldn’t have had to if you just…”
Showed up?
Say it. It’d be well within your right to say it. Indeed, it was your prerogative to. That’s what I deserved, to be cast as the villain. It would clear my consciousness, just a little, yet you stopped. Why?
But maybe the quiet part didn’t need to be said out loud. The message seemed clear enough as glares like sharpened blades turned toward me. Sayaka began to speak, presumably to mitigate the blame aimed at me, but I stopped her. Remember what we agreed on, I said with my eyes.
Then an idea struck: I was the villainess. The true objective of this arc wasn’t to win the school’s Sports Day—it was about convincing Miyu to accept the operation she needed. I could still do something about Miyu; this current predicament I found myself in didn’t really matter, and I could use it to my advantage.
Realizing this might’ve been the chance I was waiting for, I dismissively brushed a lock of hair from my shoulders. “So, I missed Sports Day. What of it?”
“You knew how important today was!” Natsumi exploded. “Now Nonoka’s friend won’t be getting the operation she needs thanks to you!”
“So sue me,” I replied with a glib smile. “Her promise was never mine to keep.”
The words stung even as they left my mouth, and part of me recoiled at my own callousness. Nevertheless, all that was just a sign that I was playing my role correctly. I clenched my teeth, squared my shoulders, and steeled myself against the discomfort.
Natsumi’s eyes flared. “You…are unbelievable! How can you even say that?!”
“Wait, Natsumi,” Nonoka cut in, her voice calm. “I’m sure Ms. Mio has her reasons.”
Oh, Nonoka. Your defense of me, even now, makes you the perfect heroine. I’m sure we could’ve been the best of friends—but I’m sorry. When it comes down to it—I would choose Shizuku over you every time.
“How can you still defend her?!” Natsumi yelled, turning on Nonoka.
Their friendship fraying before my eyes was not my intent, so I pressed harder. “Honestly, Nonoka, she’s right. The bleeding-heart act is starting to get old. There’s no noble cause behind my actions. I didn’t help you because, frankly, your plight means nothing to me. It’s that simple.”
A bit of actual anger bled through, the frustration that despite everything, Nonoka continued to treat me like a friend, as she strove to understand me as one. Her face finally twisted in shock. “You…You don’t mean that,” she said quietly.
“Are you calling me a liar?” I challenged.
If I were truly kind, I couldn’t have pushed away Nonoka with such cruelty. This was just proof that at heart, I was a selfish person who was more than willing to discard her classmates like litter if it served my purposes.
So, Nonoka, hate me. Curse me out. Take that anger and grief you feel and channel it to better yourself.
Clutching the hems of my tracksuit, I met her gaze with a sneer. “If your friend mattered as much to you as you claim, you should have taken action yourself.”
Nonoka looked hurt for a moment, then she bit her lip and cast her eyes downward. Natsumi jumped to her defense fiercely. “How dare you? You have no idea the kind of effort she put in.” She paused. “You know, I actually let myself believe there was some kindness in you. Hah. Who was I fooling?”
A general student condemning a Corporate student in public—her outburst turned into a spectacle. The surrounding crowd murmured in hushed, stunned tones, yet no one intervened. They just all looked at me in disgust and disdain, not only the general students but my Corporate peers as well.
I’d done it. I finally accomplished what I’d set out to do and became the villainess. It had taken longer than expected, requiring some improvisation on my part, but that was it.
I was now one, giant step closer to saving Shizuku.
So why did I feel so empty inside?