Although the one who spoke to me was dressed in a similar leather dress as the twist bread girl—the nun called Crescen—her red hair and red eyes gave her away instantly. It was the special-class knight: Ruvy Miaspica.
“Why’re you two here?!” I shouted.
“This part of the market is for women’s jewelry! It’s weirder for you to be here!” Crescen barked back with fangs bared, dashing to hide behind Ruvy.
I couldn’t really fault her there.
“Are you...alone today?” Ruvy asked, glaring at me from the top of my head to my fingertips as she looked around. Her gaze was as intense as ever, and although I felt my nerves wilting, I told myself that I hadn’t done anything wrong, so I should just stand proud. I assumed the reason Ruvy didn’t have her armor or sword was that she was off duty today.
“Stuff happened, you know,” I said.
I felt a strange rattling from above as the slime pounded me on the head. It caused my own head to shake, but I couldn’t really talk to the slime while two ladies from the church were present, so I ignored it.
“Hmm...” Ruvy said.
I felt a strong stare, but fortunately they didn’t comment on me carrying around the slime. You really stood out when you had a slime on your head...
“No matter,” Ruvy went on. “Now then, Hakura Istilla...”
“Wait. There’s been something I’ve been wanting to tell you,” I said.
“What?”
“Don’t call me by my full name.”
“Fine, fine. Now, Hakura.”
I hated hearing my home name said out loud, but it also felt weird being referred to so directly. However, Ruvy’s next words put those thoughts aside.
“Apparently you...did something terrible...to her,” she said.
“Ohh, I dunno. Who could say?” I said after a long pause.
I turned my head, averted my eyes, even twisted my body to try and walk away, but just like what had happened the other day, I felt my wrist being grabbed.
“Don’t try and play dumb!” Crescen said. “Lady Ruvy, this man said that he would physically harm me if I didn’t accede to his demands! And then he turned violent and inflicted great pain to my head!”
“I tried to deal with things in a peaceful way!” I said.
I’d just given her a full-on glare and then flicked her forehead after she wouldn’t back down!
Ruvy nodded as Crescen spoke and I felt her increase the pressure around my wrist. Crap, I can’t shake her off...
“Now then... Why don’t you join me...at the church?” Ruvy said.
“What, somewhere with extraterritoriality?!”
“Your sincerity will decide...whether you leave in one piece.”
“I don’t consent to any unlawful investigation!” I shouted. I was pulling my arm with all my might, but it didn’t budge. I needed to take desperate measures, so I went on, “It was thanks to your subordinate’s little sacrifice that the trial didn’t end with a false verdict.”
“Ngh...”
The Carbuncles had to avoid verdict mistakes at any cost. Cormeca had been a tricky character, so if we hadn’t showed up who knows what would have happened.
“If that had occurred, then it would’ve been a huge blow to your honor. You shouldn’t be berating me, but thanking me.”
Both of us were in the wrong, but one of us was more so. Ruvy bit her lip, aware of her position as the leader of her organization.
I was happy to have finally silenced her, but then Crescen chimed in.
“You’re an adventurer. Could you not have thought of another way to get a nun to stand down without flicking her on the forehead?”
“I’m not talking about logic and reason right now,” I said.
“Then what are you talking about?!”
“About my own damn safety!”
“Fine, fine,” Ruvy said after a big sigh. She let go of my arm. “It is as you say. This time...our verdict was wrong. You were...correct.”
“Glad you get the picture.”
“I apologize, Crescen. Please...be strong.”
As the pair spoke to one another, I felt a rush of gratitude for the release of my arm. I felt a little guilty, but I didn’t mind if it meant I could be free. All I needed to do was skedaddle and... Hold on.
“Hey, I have a request for you two,” I said.
“What?”
Ruvy eyed me with the utmost suspicion, most likely surprised to hear the word “request” come out of my mouth. Her well-shaped eyebrows were knitted as closely as they could. Come on, don’t be that surprised...
“It’s nothing big,” I said. “Think of it as recompense for the other day.”
“The one who should be receiving recompense is Erifell Leston, not you,” Crescen said.
“Like I said, I’m not talking about logic and reason!”
I didn’t know how to explain things to Ruvy, who was evidently distrustful of me, so I decided that maybe it was best to just be honest.
“I upset Leen, so I wanted to get something to cheer her up, but I dunno what sorta thing she’d like.”
“Huh?”
“I thought, well, you two are girls and close in age. You must have things you’d like, so I thought you could give me some ideas.”
Ruvy and Crescen looked at one another before whispering among themselves. It didn’t sound like they were bad-mouthing me... After a little while, Crescen stepped forward and looked at me with an expression of exasperation and pity.
“I’m not sure what I think about asking a girl to help you get a present for another girl...”
“How many times do I need to say that this isn’t about logic and reason!”
“Yes, but isn’t the most important aspect that you choose something and show your sincerity? The item itself is secondary, I’d think.”
“Quit hitting me with logic. I have no damn reply!”
“Why don’t you go to a proper jeweler and get her an engagement ring instead of rifling around these stalls?”
“And quit it with the horror stories too...”
An unpleasant chill ran down my back just at the thought. I felt the slime shaking on top of me. It was probably laughing at me. Dammit...
“If you’re not putting any sincerity into your choice, then you can show it by buying something expensive.”
This Crescen really spoke her mind. What I was doing was apparently insincere to begin with so I couldn’t really quip back. I needed to change tactics.
“Heh, I see. So basically this is a task that a special-class knight can’t solve. I guess I shouldn’t have asked,” I said.
“H-How dare you insult Lady Ruvy...!”
Crescen was furious, but I saw Ruvy’s eyes go cold.
“Huh? Of course...I can answer you,” Ruvy said.
“Please, Lady Ruvy! Don’t let him rile you up!”
“If I back down here...that would bring shame upon...Archbishop Corranda, who appointed me a special-class knight... Isn’t that right, Crescen?”
“W-Well, maybe, but maybe not!”
Heh. Luckily for me, she was so easy to wind up.
“I am the head of the Carbuncles...and preside over many maidens. Of course I know...what a young woman would like!”
As Ruvy muttered this, her expression was as serious as it had been during the witch trial. She wandered off around the stalls and returned after a few minutes with a triumphant smile on her face and her chest puffed out with pride.
“How about this? I found a useful ring...that can light ten meters ahead of you even in the dark!”
“Uh...”
“Or perhaps an earring...that can detect water. There was also...an accessory that makes your shoes lighter...”
“That’s enough, thank you, Ruvy. Accept my gratitude for looking around.”
Ugh, she was no better than me. Or, alternatively, perhaps I was correct in my initial assumptions that they were good choices.
Crescen tugged Ruvy’s sleeve as she made a disappointed face.
“Lady Ruvy, if I may?”
“Yes, Crescen?”
“You shouldn’t buy presents based on practicality. Also, the designs were atrocious.”
“Really...?”
“Really. I hate to break it to you.”
Watching this little exchange, I wasn’t sure who was looking after who here. Without changing her expression, Ruvy slumped her shoulders to express her dissatisfaction.
I felt more shaking from above me. I guessed the slime was laughing once again. I gave it a little smack, and it merely wobbled on my head even more violently than before.
“Ugh...” Crescen said. “What did you do to upset her anyway?”
“I, uh, tugged her hair and pulled a clump out...”
“Maybe you deserve death...”
“As I’ve said again and again... No logic and reason here...”
Crescen held her own twist bread hair close to her as she gave me a look of utter disgust. As for Ruvy, maybe because she had short hair, she merely cocked her head, somewhat confused.
I’d expected to achieve at least something by asking them, but this conversation had just ended with me getting exhausted. It’d be most pragmatic at this stage to just say goodbye. I doubted they wanted to waste much more time with me, and this was a good place to end the conversation.
“Right, anyway, I know not to ask you about this kinda stuff again. See ya,” I said.
I turned around and raised a hand as I walked away. I’d wasted a whole bunch of time and mental energy.
“Ow!”
But then I suddenly felt pain in the back of my head.
“What’re you doing?!”
I spun around and gave the only reasonable retort. I saw Crescen sticking her tongue out at me. They were already far away, and soon enough they disappeared into the crowd.
“Dammit... The hell did she throw at me?”
“This, lad.”
The slime extended its body to show me what that nun had chucked at my head. Apparently it had caught the object. The slime was holding a tin. No wonder it hurt. My bubbling anger vanished the moment I saw what was written on it.
“Maybe you should say thank you, lad?”
The can read: Honey-based hair cream. Guaranteed to make your hair shine! I’d damaged Leen’s hair, so maybe I should give her something to help it.
“Yeah, maybe...”
It was a logical and sensible idea.