“Who does he think he is, that snot-nosed pumpkin head?!”
I had started shouting at the top of my voice the moment we hit the road. We were riding in a gleaming black limousine. Yuri, sitting next to me in the back seat, and Mr. Merutonan up front next to the driver, both covered their ears in disapproval. The driver was an android, and couldn’t have cared less. The others could have learned a thing or two from him!
“You sure can be a loudmouth, Kei!” said Yuri angrily.
“What do you mean by that?” I retorted, springing to the attack. “You sure can keep your prissy poise after being put through all that!”
“Is there anything wrong with that?”
“Wrong!” I cried, provoked anew. “Don’t you have any nerves?”
“Sure I do!” Yuri puffed out her cheeks. “Plenty—”
“Oh, forget it!”
It was hopeless.
Actually, it had all begun when we debarked from Lovely Angel.
Worn to a rag, thoroughly depressed by the crash of the Galapagos, we trudged morosely down Lovely Angel’s gangway into the takeoff/landing port at Kurutomi Space Port.
Everything seemed a chore. We didn’t even want to talk. All we really wanted to do if we could was hide under our blankets in Lovely Angel’s sleeping cabin and sulk. But we could hardly do that. We had come here to do a job. Moreover, we still had to square away the Galapagos disaster.
Oh for sure, it had only happened because those UFOs had taken it upon themselves to attack us, run away, and smash into the spaceliner. But we still couldn’t escape feeling responsible. As WWWA Trouble Consultants, it had been our duty to shoot them down before things went that far. Steeped in gloom, we went downstairs and got on the moving sidewalk. Yuri and I were both empty-handed, without even a bag to our name. We’d left Mugi behind in Lovely Angel.
We got off at the immigration counter.
Of course, all WWWA agents have free passes. We just flashed our ID cards, and we were through. I didn’t much like the way the immigration officer stared at us though, as if we were a couple of monsters. If I’d met him in the street, he never would have gotten away with it.
We took the elevator to the first-floor lobby—where we found a group of men waiting for us.
There were about twenty of them. They were all tall, keen-eyed, and wrapped in black coats. Some of them even had on sunglasses. We hesitated before approaching them, afraid they might be gangsters. It wasn’t because we were scared of them, mind you. We were just scared of jumping to conclusions and getting into a brawl. Once—on planet Berosu, I think it was—we’d mistaken some actors on location for real gangsters and beaten them to a pulp. We didn’t want to make the same mistake twice.
All twenty pairs of eyes followed us as we stepped out of the elevator. I felt a little uneasy as to what the following minutes might bring. One of the men stepped forward.
This guy didn’t have a coat. He was wearing a black, three-piece pinstriped suit with the flair of a fashion model. Besides which, he was just incredibly handsome.
He looked thirty-four, maybe thirty-five. He had a fearless face with a strong, well-shaped nose. A shock of dark brown hair hung over his forehead. He was breathtakingly sexy. His aquamarine eyes glinted like priceless jewels, and when they turned on me they sent a shiver down my spine, turning my knees to jelly.
He was even taller than the gang of beanstalks around him, easily topping 190 centimeters. He was terribly lean, but his sharp movements bespoke of iron muscles.
The man smiled softly, revealing a glimmer of pearly white teeth.
Oh, he was too much. I was walking on air. Take me!
In a deep voice at once masculine and tender, the man spoke— “Aren’t you cold in that getup?”
In a moment I was myself again. What’s it to you, buddy?! What’s the big idea, ruining my good mood?! I don’t need your advice. It may look bare to you, but we’re completely protected, not only where there’s fabric but where it looks like our skin’s exposed, too. We’re encased in a transparent sheathing of ultra-thin reinforced polymer. The polymer was developed by WWWA’s own research labs, and even gives us some protection against heat and bullets. That’s more than a country bumpkin like you deserves to know!
I glared at the man as I rattled that off in my mind. Yuri seemed to have had the same reaction. She glowered at him as if he were her worst enemy.
The man noticed he’d made a blooper. Slightly flustered, he tried again.
“Ah, that was rude of me. You two young ladies wouldn’t happen to be WWWA Trouble Consultants?”
So that was it. Well, why hadn’t he said so in the first place? I let my expression relax a little.
“That’s ri-ight,” I cooed. “Are you from the Gravas Foundation?”
“No.”
Mr. Handsome slowly shook his head. His every move was deliberate, and it was getting on my nerves; he smiled with the corner of his mouth. Another unpleasant premonition ran down my spine.
“My name is Bayleaf,” he said. Still smirking, he spaced out his words momentously. “I’m an inspector of the Dangle Central Police.”
Eeek!
I let loose a silent scream. For a moment my whole body went rigid. Talk about things that don’t get along! It’s a rare combination that can get along any worse than us and the local cops. I wildly cursed my hunch. It had, as usual, been right on target.
“Criminal Trouble Consultants Kei and Yuri,” Inspector Bayleaf continued. “No, let’s dispense with the formalities. We’ll just call you the Dirty Pair.”
We were stunned speechless. Pressing his advantage, Bayleaf became even more overbearing. Blast! If you want to keep things short, our official code name is Lovely Angel!
“Dirty Pair!” his voice grew even sharper. “The reason we’ve come to this space port today is to send you packing!
“The explosion and fire at Gravas Heavy Industries that you’ve been asked to investigate falls under my jurisdiction. I’ve determined that it was an accident. Of course, I conducted a thorough investigation. My conclusion is based on that investigation. No matter what angle you pursue, there is no room for doubt.
“But those fools at the Gravas Foundation! I don’t know what got into them, but they went and petitioned the WWWA to reopen the investigation. And moreover. Moreover! The people they send to do it are none other than the infamous Dirty Pair! Do you expect us to put up with that?