“Since you have forfeited the trial, does this mean you intend to reside permanently in this country…?” the king’s twin faces asked serenely.
He sounded like an Enola asking a student for an answer they already knew the answer to. The king’s kind, solemn voice suddenly made Belle recall a shadow she saw cross the king’s face once. It was a sudden sense of déjà vu.
A calm, mature atmosphere; bright blue eyes; teasing gestures; white fur. But all those features failed to form a complete memory, floating fragmented within the bottom of her heart.
Why…?
Shaking off that thought, Belle refuted the king.
“No, I’m not, King Rawhide. I just want to wait for my next chance. I still have that right, don’t I?”
“…Yes, Little One. But know that many have said this before you, only to end up abandoning their journey and choosing to live under Park’s Thema. And the longer they continued to aspire to journey, the worse their life and position become.”
“But surely some didn’t.”
That’s right. Something within Belle strongly believed that. She would learn from those who hadn’t given up and continue working toward departing on her journey.
“I’ll try to figure things out by the start of next season. And if I still haven’t, then someday, for sure, I’ll—”
“Little One,” the king’s upper face said, gently cutting Belle off.
“Ye who bring about howls,” the king’s bottom face said ironically.
He sounded like he was trying to point out something to Belle that she’d never noticed before. She’d honestly never heard anyone call her that.
“I bring about howls…?”
“Yes,” both of the king’s faces said as one. “Should you depart on your journey, you will cause many people great concern. The howl—the rund—your existence gives off speaks to your nature as a person, even when you are silent. In leaving, you would remove yourself from your normal pitch, the places where you belong. Perhaps you hate the curse and blessing of lightness. You long for it, you love it, and yet you reject it, seeking it while simultaneously loathing it… Indeed, in ways you do not see or understand, many residents of Park loyal to this country had to confront a great shock in facing your howl, as they were filled with concern and confusion. To them, it is nothing but a curse… They are bound together merely by the fact that you are here, resolved to depart on your journey.”
“What do you mean by that…?” Belle frowned dubiously. “Are you saying…I’m a bad influence on the people who care about me?” she asked, responding to the king’s tone that sounded like an accusation, choosing each word carefully.
All of a sudden, something felt awfully suspicious to Belle. The king’s attitude had changed radically. It felt like the moment he confirmed Belle would give up on playing the Key, the king had been trying to gently restrain her.
“You simply do not know,” the king said slowly, trying to persuade her, “that what you bring about shapes a singular destiny, just by you being there and believing. Do you seek a world where all things raise their voice in a howl…? No, things will eventually come to that either way… You turn your back on a world at rest, standing for a Thema where all people are not able to understand one another, wishing to bring about a conflict of noise…”
“King Rawhide, I—”
“God’s Tonality does not wish for this,” the king said flatly, cutting off anything Belle may have said. “And many people would not accept it, either. Little One…your chance to play the Key will eventually come again. But in my eyes, any attempt to resist God, no matter how small, is not permissible. No matter how inevitably the world may try to shift, I cannot allow the banner of savagery to be raised. I cannot acknowledge the existence of this abandoned instrument, the only thing God cannot perceive…”
Emotion filled his voice, then the king slowly trailed off.
Seizing her chance, Belle got to her feet and spoke up.
“You’re calling me an abandoned instrument…?”
She didn’t really care, though. Belle only asked as a way of resisting this one-sided verbal barrage. She didn’t wait for the king to answer, not realizing this question brought her closer to the secrets of the world. Without letting his words carry her away, she thought back on what he had just said and instead carried on, brushing off his words.
“King Rawhide, listen. Even with all the things I did to depart on my journey, no matter how much they entertained God, I refuse to be subjected to Him. That’s the one thing I won’t stand for. And even if others mock me, call me abandoned, tell me I’m a fool who escaped God’s watchful eye, I would still—”
“’Tis not that, Little One. The God within this sword tree will never abandon you. To do so would be for God to forsake His own role. God always resides here and uses the sword tree to whom I offer my flesh to see everything in this country.”
So it’s like a precious treasure. But who’s in charge of whom in this relationship…?
Belle left that question unsaid. She could tell, through her natural intuition, that verbalizing it would distance the king from her and create tension between them.
But why is it like that? The thought filled Belle’s mind suddenly, silent like a whisper. Is it because God is the ruler? Or is it because the people let themselves be controlled by God?
That question, in and of itself, felt blasphemous to ask.
“Little One, should you realize you won’t play the Key, then you would be wise to remain in Park… No, in this castle.”
For a second, a feeling of intense aversion ran through Belle. The offer reeked of a desire to maintain strict control over her. This was God’s will expressed by King Rawhide, but Belle rejected it with her whole body.
EEE…
Runding let out a faint howl against her back, and Belle’s body tensed up like a spring. In that moment, Belle became fully alert and capable of shifting in any direction, her body tense yet firm and supple.
However, the one to stop her at that moment was none other than the king, the sole, absolute mediator between God and the people. King Rawhide turned the gazes of his two faces toward Belle, cautioning her from translating the tension that overtook her into action. If he hadn’t, she may well have drawn her sword on the God Tree and attacked it. That was how palpable her aggression was in that moment. Compared to when she aimed her sword at the king and the God Tree during her first audience, this was much more savage, more assertive of her presence, and the king’s gaze was sterner to match.
It’s so…sad…
His blue eyes were full of cold, forlorn emotion.
“I…” Belle repeated the question the king asked her. “If I do that, I may…I may end up bringing a curse onto this castle. You said so yourself earlier, that I bring about a negative influence. Not that I know exactly what that means, but… If it’s true…”
“All of that”—the king’s voice took on a horribly saddened tone—“will be my responsibility to bear, Little One. Such is the responsibility of a king.”
He looked far into the distance, beyond Belle.
“God preordains the harmony of the people, and he will not mark going against that as sin… Even if in shouldering that sin, you are rewarded and saved, that will all return to God’s Harmony… When you live in the castle, you needn’t worry about anything anymore. Worry and concern will, in turn, only call great disaster upon you.”
Confused, Belle looked at the king’s faces in apprehension.
He’s almost talking like…he actually saw someone try to carry sins like that, people who couldn’t help but worry and be concerned in the castle… No, based on his tone, he definitely did. I don’t know what happened to them…but it must have been a terribly tragic end.
Belle felt all the tension from earlier leave her body. The king who stood so much taller than her suddenly felt smaller and more pathetic than he had a moment ago.
“King Rawhide…” But Belle’s answer wouldn’t comfort him. Belle had called out to him knowing this full well. “I’ll consider it. But I’ll still go on my journey. I made up my mind that I would. This isn’t the homeland I should be living in, so I have to set out and find that. Even if I can’t play the Key, I’ll resist God’s barriers on my own. And if I’m unlucky, I guess I’ll just die. That’s all there is to it.”
It was a philosophical take on the problem, tantamount to a declaration of war against God’s Tonality.
The king didn’t nod showing he understood. He just silently closed his eyes, as if still holding something back.