Normally, a person’s home is place of peace and tranquility, isn’t it? But at this moment, with Aria still living in my home and Shirayuki coming in as she saw fit to unabashedly take over the housework, the place reeked of girls, and no semblance of peace or tranquility could be found.
Give me a break here. I’m begging you.
Therefore, far from refusing to go school, I’ve been refusing to go home these days. Today as a well, I was cooping myself up in the study room after school with the king of all idlers, Muto, and Shiranui, who were always willing to hang out with us. The three of us were studying a game of cards. It was just a little past seven when I was starting to grow weary of Muto’s endless winning streak (the guy was always awfully lucky. It made me wonder if he were cheating), and I received a call on my cell phone. If it had been Aria, I was just going to ignore it, but the number started with zero-three. This isn’t from someone’s cell phone. Who is this?
“Hello?”
“Kinji? Where are you right now?”
Ugh. It’s Aria.
“What difference does it make? What did you want?”
“Get over here right away. I’m in room number one-zero-one at the girl’s dormitory.”
“I do not want to go to the girl’s dormitory.”
“Stop your complaining! When I say come right away, come right away! If you don’t come, I’m gonna open a hole in you!”
Click.
No room for debate. My master simply hung up on me.
With no other choice (none whatsoever), I made my way to room number one-zero-one of the girl’s dormitory ... to find the door was unlocked. Girl’s dormitories had more rooms than boy’s dormitories, and this place didn’t appear to be an exception.
Is this even Aria’s apartment?
“Hello? Aria, I’m here.”
“Jeez, that took you forever. But I’ll let it pass today.”
I stepped inside and Aria came trotting out of the bathroom in her sailor uniform. She then suddenly took a firm hold of my hand.
H-Hey. What gives?
“Come on. This way.”
She pulled me into the living room, and what I saw there was disconcerting to say the least.
“Ngh …?”
In this room, which was bathed in the pink light of candle pots, there were so many various outfits scattered about that there was no place one could go without treading on them. The sheer number of them was uncanny. There was a waitress uniform, the type of priestess garbs Shirayuki would wear, a maid uniform, a large smock like the ones worn by kindergarteners, an Alice band with cat ears attached to it, fake tails, an elementary school student’s backpack with a recorder sticking out, a pumpkin shaped garment that was most likely underwear—the list goes on.
“Kinji, which would you prefer?”
“‘Which would I prefer?’ Prefer for what?”
“What am I going to do with you, Kinji? Just because you’ve lived your life avoiding this sort of thing doesn't mean you have to be that dense. I’m asking you which kind of cosplay do you want me to do.”
Completely overwhelmed by ambience of the room, I was at a loss for words, and narrowing her slanted eyes, Aria approached me one step at a time. She stepped on my toes with her little foot, around which she wore her black knee socks, and gave me a shove so that I fell backwards onto the huge bed that was behind me.
“Kinjiii?”
Moving swiftly, Aria straddled my waist like a child would, and without warning, smothered my face with the upper half of her body. My feeling of disgust at going into hysteria mode only lasted for an instant. The sensation of marshmallow-like breasts behind her blouse being pressed against my face. The feel of her soft thighs around my waist. Enveloped by the bittersweet smell of a girl, I made the sudden switch to hysteria mode in just a few seconds.
“!”
At that moment, something flashed across my mind. And at the same time, the blood in my veins turned to ice. I was well aware that it was disrespectful of me to be having such thoughts, but Aria’s chest wasn’t this well endowed. She did misrepresent herself with a push and plunge bra, but having had it pressed against my face once before, I knew all too well what to expect. And this sensation I was feeling presently was being brought about by another girl’s body that I was familiar with from prior experience. It was exactly the same as “that” girl’s.
“... Riko ...” I said in a low, unfriendly tone.
“Bingo! I did it! I did it! Hysteria Kii-kun! You’ve taken a giant step forward!”
The girl was dressed liked Aria, but her voice became Riko’s as she lifted the upper half of her body away from me. Her large breasts jiggled underneath her uniform, and she grabbed the bottom of her chin with her right hand and one of her ponytails with her left. She then tore off the strawberry-blonde pigtails and the thin prosthetic makeup that masked her face. As I suspected, behind the façade was . . .
“It’s Rikorikorin! Hehe! I’m baaack!”
... Riko.
She was the one who killed my brother, planted a bomb on my bicycle and Butei High’s bus, and escaped after fighting with Aria and I during the high jacking incident—Riko Mine Lupin the Fourth, the “butei killer.”
What is she doing here at Butei High?!
One might expect Riko’s eyes and their double eyelids to twinkle like stars, and she narrowed them in delight as she let down her long, honey-colored, wavy hair that had been skillfully hidden under a wig. “Kii-kun, help me.”
My heart nearly jumped out of my chest. In hysteria mode, I wanted to help girls no matter what it took. If it were to help a girl with a problem or a girl in a tight bind, I wanted to assist them in any way they desired. Riko ... was obviously aware of that as she spoke.
“When you think about it, I was enrolled at two schools at once, and it’s because of you and Aria that I got expelled from IU in the first place, you know? Phooey patooey!”
Expelled from ... “IU”?
“I have a favor to ask you, Kii-kun. So for the first time, I’m going to use the method my mother taught me to make a guy listen to a girl. Hehe. We’re about to start the super sweet event that comes with the patch our customers bought, allowing you to take the Riko route.”
Like an excited beast, something hot was introduced into Riko’s breath, and she took off my tie. It was clear what she was going to say next in this situation.
What do I do?
Riko brought her adorable baby face close to mine and used her seductive lips as she spoke.
“Kii-kun, let’s have a roll in the hay."
What are you gonna do, Kinji?
To Be Continued!!!