His kiss was fierce, inexorable, and tinged with blood. An Zhe couldn’t breathe at all. He turned his head away but was then made to turn back.
He had just been feeling sad for Lu Feng mere moments ago, but now he was trembling all over with anger, and his hyphae spread out in big clumps. With only an instinctual resistance remaining, he thought to completely restrain Lu Feng.
But his eyes suddenly went blurry, and a vision appeared before him.
A figure fell over in front of him, and his heart clenched suddenly. He caught him and held him tightly in his arms. "An Zhe?"
Suddenly, An Zhe realized that this was a fragment of Lu Feng’s memories. He had drunk Lu Feng’s blood, so he would acquire some things. What had occurred just now was the scene from earlier in which he had passed out.
"An Zhe?" Lu Feng called his name several times in a row. However, the person in his arms gave no response at all; he only frowned a little and trembled all over, as though he was enduring great suffering.
Why he would suddenly become like this, Lu Feng did not know. He could only hold him tight.
He seemed to suddenly be on the verge of death—just like this volatile world.
In a daze, An Zhe experienced the feelings from that moment. Right now, his feelings and Lu Feng’s were overlapping.
Lu Feng was afraid.
He was actually afraid.
What was he afraid of?
He was afraid of losing this person in his arms, as though… as though by losing him, he would lose everything.
An Zhe began to tremble violently.
This man—
Why was it that he could be so good to him, yet also treat him with such fierceness?
The force on his shoulder made him wake up briefly from the vision, and his awareness was divided in two. One half of him was being kissed by Lu Feng in such a way that it was almost a punishment, while the other half of him was submerged in the memories of the past, witnessing this man holding him in his arms and repeatedly calling his name.
But he couldn't be roused. He looked to be such a sorrowful, docile, and frail person, yet he was enduring such intense suffering.
Lu Feng wiped away the sheen of cold sweat from his forehead, and he unconsciously grabbed Lu Feng's wrist like a drowning man clutching at a straw. At this moment, what was Lu Feng thinking?
He was thinking, I can suffer in his place, I can do anything, just so long as he wakes up again.
An Zhe closed his eyes. He was still resisting, but with less strength than before—as though he had instantly lost heart. In the end, he could only give up all resistance and let Lu Feng seize his lips and his spirit, his everything.
It was like an endless war.
Amidst this endless stalemate, the intense emotions gradually became spent.
When he was finally released, he leaned against Lu Feng's chest, having no desire to say anything.
And Lu Feng held him, equally silent.
The blank span of time was drawn out indefinitely. In the first place, there wasn't much to say between an Arbiter and a xenogenic.
In the long silence, Lu Feng suddenly spoke up.
He asked, "How did you turn into a person?"
"Because of An Ze," An Zhe said.
He leaned into Lu Feng’s arms, the two of them having come completely clean to each other. In that impulse-driven kiss, they had both cut the other open.
Thus, he no longer had anything left to hide.
In fact, he wasn't a xenogenic.
He was very useless, unable to infect anyone. He was actually a mushroom who had been infected by a human.
Lu Feng looked at his hyphae. The snow-white hyphae were still stained with blood, blood that had been drawn when An Zhe bit down. It turned out that when this little mushroom became angry, he would also be very fierce.
The blood was disappearing bit by bit as it got absorbed by the hyphae.
An Zhe looked at the same spot.
He suddenly said, "You should just die."
Lu Feng tightly held his fingers and asked, "Why?"
"I'll grow on your body," An Zhe said expressionlessly, "and eat all of your blood, organs, and flesh, then grow on your bones."
With his other hand, Lu Feng slowly gripped An Zhe’s wrist, and his fingertips slid over the white skin, leaving behind a pale red mark. It was like he had damaged a white mushroom that had popped up after the rain, its juices flowing out. He asked in a low voice, "Do you know what you're saying?"
An Zhe shook his head, a lump forming in his throat. With tear-filled eyes, he looked up at the walls that were covered with deep green traces of mold and at the distorted flowing chandelier. The strong winds had broken the window, and rain poured in through the radiating crack, accompanied by the wind's mournful whispers.
He thought that he didn't know how to define his emotions either, but if he wanted to peacefully stay together with Lu Feng, there truly was no other path to take.
In this manner, he looked at the unreachable sky.
Lu Feng said, "You're crying again."
An Zhe turned his head back to look at Lu Feng. At this angle, he needed to tilt his head back slightly.
So they locked eyes.
For some reason, while looking at Lu Feng, An Zhe smiled again.
The corners of his lips were slightly reddened, and the corners of his beautiful eyes were still damp.
So Lu Feng smiled as well.
He held An Zhe's face in his hands. "… So silly."
An Zhe only looked at him. After a very long time, he asked, "Is the base already coming to fetch you?"
Lu Feng said, "Yes."
An Zhe said nothing. Lu Feng asked, "Do you like the base?"
Just as the word "base" was spoken, the pain of being electrocuted once again spread throughout An Zhe's body. He started trembling and forcefully burrowed into Lu Feng.
Lu Feng caught him and gently stroked his back. "I'm sorry."
An Zhe shook his head.
It wasn't until three minutes had gone by that An Zhe once again calmed down.
He tilted his head back to look at Lu Feng and tightly held his hand.
He seems to be waiting for something, Lu Feng thought.
He had that thought and acted on it. As though possessed by something, Lu Feng leaned down slightly and kissed An Zhe again.
No violent movements, no resistance, just a deep and quiet kiss.
An Zhe’s soft lips no longer resisted. During the break when they were catching their breaths, Lu Feng looked at him—softly panting, slightly-lowered eyelashes strewn with glimmering droplets, hands gently resting upon his shoulders. It was a timid ingratiation, a gentle innocence, so pure that it bordered on compassion. Within that compassion was divinity; it was like the alms offered up by a spirit, and right now he was demanding everything.
But he was still crying.
Lu Feng kissed away his tears, as if by doing so he could erase all the sorrows between them.
By the time they were done, the rain outside had gradually come to a stop, and the evening sky was glowing with a cloudy, pale light.
An Zhe knelt on the bed, his fingers trembling as he held Lu Feng and slowly, slowly laid him flat on the bed.
Lu Feng’s eyes were shut, for he had fallen asleep. His breathing was even, and now nothing could wake him. Achieving this was very simple; during the kiss, An Zhe only needed to transform part of the tip of his tongue into soft hyphae. Not even the Colonel could tell.
The sleeping Lu Feng could not catch him. He could not do anything to him.
An Zhe smiled. In fact, Lu Feng had never been able to do anything at all to him, he suddenly realized.
To leave or to stay.
He had to decide for himself.
Suddenly—
An Zhe's vision went black, and violent pain tore through him. The last hypha broke.
Something was separated, like a human losing an arm or an eye—but no, it wasn't those trivial things. The spore's existence was far more important than limbs or organs.