It was the Juliart perfume Ginka had bought her as a gift. Ruka shook the jewel-shaped bottle, and a citrus scent wafted out.
“Ugh...” Ruka collapsed on her bed and felt her body sink into the soft mattress. She was still gripping the bottle. “Ginka, you dummy...”
She told me to go back to my old life, but I can’t do that! Life without her doesn’t feel right anymore. That girl is unbelievably strong, and righteous, and kind. She’s out there fighting, and here I am in bed even though I owe her my life. It’s so frustrating. I can’t stand it!
“Dummy...” This time, Ruka was talking to herself.
She had once called herself a normal gyaru, and that was exactly right. She was perfectly and pathetically normal, so she couldn’t do anything to help someone as amazing as Ginka.
It’s...so...damn...frustrating...! Ruka kicked her bed over and over, but that didn’t stop her feelings from overwhelming her.
When she heard Ryoko’s “I’m heading out!” she couldn’t even make herself respond.
Ginka wasn’t at school the next day. Her seat in the back of the classroom was empty, and it stayed that way when homeroom began. When Tani confirmed her absence, everyone in class was shocked.
Meiri poked Ruka in the shoulder. “You know something.”
“I don’t...”
“You one hundred percent do... Wait, why are your eyes all swollen?”
“I’ll tell you later. Just leave it for now, ’kay?” Ruka knew she was an awful liar, so this was her way of defending herself.
Meiri looked like she still wanted to say something, but she must’ve sensed something was up and left Ruka alone.
Ginka’s absence seemed to make their first period English teacher nervous at first, but class got back on track soon enough.
Everyone’s gonna get used to not having Ginka around, thought Ruka. Mei, Hina, even me... Ugh, when did my thoughts get so depressing? Gross...
As soon as first period ended, Ruka slumped on her desk.
“Ruka’s been acting kinda strange all morning,” Meiri told Hinaru.
“Is something wrong, Ruka-chin? Are you depressed or something?”
Hinaru’s voice was weirdly muffled. Ruka looked up, saw her friend wearing a black mask, and put her head back down.
“Depressed?” Meiri repeated. “Yeah, maybe...”
“Why? Did Gin-chan say something?”
“That’s not it.” Ruka wasn’t going to say anything, but the words just came out when she heard Hinaru’s question. Ginka’s the reason I feel like this, but it’s not like we had a fight, and it’s not her fault anyway. If I’m gonna blame someone, it’s gotta be me. “I’ve got nothing... No strength, no dreams...”
Meiri and Hinaru gave Ruka an uneasy look.
“Oof, this is a bad one... Let’s do it, Hina,” said Meiri.
“Do what?” Hinaru asked. “Oh! Whoever wins cheers her up?”
“Sounds good.”
The two of them started playing rock-paper-scissors. Hinaru won with paper, and her face scrunched up so that anyone could tell she was smiling. “You’ve got nothing? No way! Your face is super cute, Ruka-chin, and you’re great with makeup. Your fashion’s on point too. You’re...okay, I guess, at studying and dancing. You’re pretty popular with the guys, and, um... Oh, you can do latte art!”
“That’s not what I’m looking for right now...” Ruka mumbled. She knew Hinaru had to try pretty hard to come up with nice things to say, but she also knew none of it was fake. Stuff like that normally made Ruka really happy, but she wasn’t her normal self at all.
“Huh? Really?” Hinaru asked.
“Makeup and fashion is so...normal,” grumbled Ruka. “Normal girls think about stuff like that... I’m normal. A normal girl with no strength or dreams... A normal gyaru.”
“What’s a normal gyaru?”
“Not sure...”
Ruka was feeling more and more down. I already know I can’t do anything, but I’m still being pathetic and getting all worked up and bothering my friends. I’m worse than “normal”... I’m a giant pain in the butt. Sorry, Hina. I know you’re trying to cheer me up.
“I-I think you have something special, Moriki-san,” a nervous voice chimed in.
Ruka looked up again. She saw a pretty girl with her black hair in braids standing behind Hinaru and Meiri—the class rep, Chinami Hayami.
“Um, I-I came to pick up the student council surveys, and I happened to overhear...” she added in a fluster.
Meiri and Hinaru each placed a hand on her shoulders and led her closer to Ruka.
“Chinami, you’re up.”
“Go for it, Chi-tan.”
“Huh? R-Right... A lot happened between me and Shijunana-san in the past. I mean, I said something weird in the changing room after gym, and, well...”
On Ginka’s first day here, she’d made Chinami cry with her power to see through lies. That incident had been a rough experience for Ginka, and apparently it’d been the same for Chinami.
“Back then, I couldn’t think at all. My friends covered for me, but I had no idea what to do...”
Well, yeah. Of course she was gonna be a mess after Ginka called her a liar in front of every girl in class. Plus she knew it was true.
“But you stepped in, Moriki-san. Not just to protect me but Shijunana-san too. I can’t imagine anyone else doing that. You may think that you don’t have anything that makes you special, but I don’t think that’s true.”
Sure, I got involved, but Chinami’s wrong. I wasn’t trying to protect them. I just didn’t want the whole thing to get worse and more awkward. I didn’t do it because of some sense of justice or whatever. “You’re making a big deal out of nothing. Anyone could’ve done that.”
Chinami turned bright red and slammed her hands down on Ruka’s desk. “That’s not true!”
“S-Sorry...” said Ruka.
“I-I’ve really, really wanted to thank you. But I haven’t been able to...until now. I’m sorry... A-Ah, no, I-I mean, thank you, s-so...” Chinami stammered.
Meiri tugged on her shoulder. “Chinami, you’re getting too worked up.”
Chinami seemed to realize Meiri was right. She looked embarrassed and took a few steps back.
“Did that shake you outta your slump?” Meiri asked Ruka.
“I shook right past it. Now I’m just embarrassed...” Ruka replied, but she really was relieved.
Meiri slowly smoothed back her hair, and the bold smile on her face made her look fearless. “Lemme show the two of you how it’s done.”
Ruka wasn’t sure what Meiri was gonna do. Why’s she being so confident all of a sudden?
“We’ve been close since middle school, so I know you,” said Meiri. “A slap on the butt gets you more fired up than a compliment.”
Ruka looked at her. “That’s sexual harassment.”
Meiri sighed and patted Ruka’s shoulder. “Not what I meant. You’re overthinking this. Just have fun. If you don’t have a dream, then look for one. Nothing wrong with that, right?”
“I’m not that dumb...” Ruka trailed off. Come on. I know I’m not smart, but I would have to be really dumb for something that simple to make me feel better. Even if I go find Ginka, I’ll just get in her way. It sucks, but it’s true. That’s why I’m not even trying. Sorry, guys, but I’m still gonna be depressed for a while.
Meiri narrowed her eyes. “Hm. Fine, you’re not dumb. But I’m pretty sure you have to be an idiot to have so much fun hanging out with your friends and doing fun stuff together. It takes an idiot to get up in other people’s business just to help them out too. Are you really okay with not being dumb, Ruka?”
“That’s different...”
Everything just feels bleh right now. I can’t get excited about stuff with Mei or Hina, and I can’t accept the nice things Chinami’s saying either. Making people around me worry isn’t fun at all. I hate this.
But then, something shifted in Ruka’s mind.
A pretty girl with silver hair, silver eyes, and black gloves... A returning student so beautiful, she’ll throw you for a loop but so bad at expressing herself... A serious and blunt vampire hunter... You gotta be crazy to hang out with a girl like that. But I wanna be her friend. Maybe being crazy’s totally fine.
“You’re right. I’ve been a real dummy.”
Do what’s fun. If I don’t have a dream, look for one. If my only other choice is getting all depressed over complicated stuff, I’d rather be an idiot. Better to be dumb if that means I get to see Ginka. Why do I need to be smart anyway?
“Mei.”
“Yeah?”
“Are you a genius?”
Meiri didn’t answer Ruka, but the smile on her face basically said, “What, you just noticed?”
“Y-You’re good now, Ruka-chin?” asked Hinaru.
“No way...” Chinami looked stunned.
Ruka stood up, faced the girls, and said, “Meiri, take a step back. Hinaru, Chinami, move a little closer. Mm-hmm, closer...”
The three girls looked confused but followed Ruka’s instructions. When they couldn’t get any closer to each other, Ruka wrapped her arms around all of them and squeezed as hard as she could.
“Waaah!” Chinami yelped.
“I get it. I’m normal. I’m nothing special at all!” said Ruka.
“C-Can’t. Breathe...” Hinaru wheezed.
Ruka beamed at everyone. “But I’ve got the greatest buds! That’s more than enough!”
“L-Let go, dummy!” Meiri snapped. “You’re wrecking my hair!”