I’d expected to find them in the drawing room, but when I arrived, it was empty. Or rather, a servant who’d prepared the room for company stood waiting in the corner, but the duke and his guest were nowhere to be seen. Where had they gone? I asked the servant. He was reluctant to answer, but when I pressed him further, insisting that I needed to know as captain of the guards, he nervously told me that they had both headed to the duke’s quarters.
This just keeps getting more suspicious. Are they that concerned about being overheard? If they’ve shut themselves in his room, then it’ll be harder for me to eavesdrop...
But to my surprise, when I arrived at the duke’s room, the door was invitingly ajar. It felt like an obvious trap—maybe the moment I peeked in, my eye would be gouged out.
My hesitation lasted only an instant. In this kingdom, it was impossible to get anywhere without taking risks. Stifling my presence and silencing my footfalls as best as I could, I crept closer to the door and listened carefully.
“Ah!”
Hmm?
Rather than the scheming voices of villains, I heard a strange cry. I wasn’t close enough to pick up much more, though. After a moment’s indecision, I moved to peek in through the crack in the door.
My eyes widened in shock at the sight that leaped out at me. There, inside, was the duke—comforting himself. He sat on the floor, slumped against the black sheets hanging off the side of his bed. Sweet sighs spilled from his throat as his hand worked busily between his legs. Distinctly salacious squelching noises mingled with the duke’s intermittent frail moans, filling the room with an air of debauchery.
The entire scene was plainly abnormal—repulsive, even. Why? Because not half an hour ago, the duke had been issuing commands at the battle by the Pieira River. He’d commanded me to dispose of Prince Sighart, and he’d watched with his own eyes as I’d carried out his orders. Immediately afterward, a change had come over him, and he’d rushed back to the manor to do this—in other words, the duke had become aroused by his own despicable acts, and now he was indulging himself as he recalled it all.
I knew that I was witnessing the depraved actions of an incomprehensible monster... But for some reason, I found myself unable to pull my eyes away from the scene unfolding beyond the door.
“Ngh... Guh... Nn!”
The duke was pleasuring himself, but there was something pained in his demeanor. He groaned and struggled as though he were being held back by something—as though he were drowning. He continued writhing in frustration for some time. His gaze wandered restlessly all around him...and came to a sudden stop, fixed on a single point.
He was looking at his nightstand—and at the red flower that sat atop it. It was one of those roses that he would sometimes gaze upon with a desperate yearning in his eyes. Time seemed to stand still briefly as he stared at it, but eventually, he tentatively slipped a hand into his open shirt. He felt around for something, and then—
“Hhhh! Ngh!”
—instantly, a sweetness filled his voice. He continued his motions, as though he were desperately clinging onto something. His main hand resumed its movement as well, and with short, quick gasps, he lost himself in the deed. He looked to be in far more pleasure than before, and he continued gradually rising to crest his peak...
Suddenly, the duke’s body jerked and jolted.
“Hhhhgh, aaauh!”
His toes curled, his back arched, and he shuddered, twitched, as he reached his climax. He remained in that state for a few seconds before his head abruptly slumped back. Even from where I watched, I could plainly see that his eyes were unfocused. That scarlet hue, normally cold and muddy, was melting and wavering now... A single teardrop spilled from his eye.
I jerked away from the door with a start, then nervously scanned the hallway around me. Thankfully, no one was nearby. I ran away as fast as my legs could carry me, forgetting my original goal as I fled that bubble of twisted perversion. I raced aimlessly down the hall and frantically ducked into the first empty room I found.
My heart was pounding in my chest like a drum. I hadn’t run far, but my breathing was ragged.
What the hell... What the hell was that?
I clutched at my shaky body and sank down to crouch on the floor. As I buried my head between my knees, my darkened field of vision filled with the duke as I’d just witnessed him. His pale, sweat-drenched skin—his hands working to torment and punish his own body—his fevered breaths as he writhed and suffered—and finally, running down his cheek like a plea for forgiveness, that single tear.
I’d been watching that vile, despicable monster, but in that moment, he’d been so beautiful that it had sent chills down my spine.
No, no! This isn’t right! Something’s wrong with me—this isn’t real!
Over and over, I denied it, but no matter how much I tried, a voice in the depths of my heart refused to be ignored.
I want him.
I slammed my fist into a wall with all my might. Stinging pain coursed through my knuckles, but I didn’t feel even the slightest bit calmer.
After spending so long serving evil, maybe I’ve finally gone mad as well...
Thoughts of my true master, and of the cause I’d sworn myself to, spiraled around my filthy, soiled heart like bitter accusations. All the while, I just sat there in a daze. There was nothing else I could do.