I spurred on my horse as fast as I could, hoping the wind would cool off my feverish body. But by the time I arrived back at the estate, I’d only gotten worse. I rushed into the manor, driven by the frenzied pounding of my racing heart. My butler, waiting at the door, greeted me with a respectful bow.
“Welcome back, Your Grace. We have just—”
“Not now. I’m going to my room. I’ll call for you once I’m settled. Just leave me alone until then.”
I didn’t have time to worry about whatever Karl was saying. I sidestepped him and hurried past, boots roughly pounding down the hallways as I raced straight toward my bedroom. Somehow, I made it there in one piece, and I quickly slipped inside like a man seeking refuge.
As I stumbled toward the bed, I threw off my jacket and let my belt with the heavy iron whip fall to the floor. I clawed at the scarf around my neck, ripped it away, then tore open the fastened-up buttons of my shirt, desperate to free myself from all the stifling layers. As I shivered at the sensation of cool air on my chest, my knees suddenly gave out, and I crumpled down to the carpet. I’d been standing right in front of the bed, and I just barely managed to cling onto the black sheets to keep my head from hitting the floor. I knelt there, heaving out short, gasping breaths, but my body refused to calm down even a little.
The spectacle I’d just witnessed kept on playing and replaying inside my head. The streak of red flying through the air. The boy and girl washed away on the currents. And turning around to face me, that glimmering, wavering, beautiful emerald green!
More shivers ran through me. Goose bumps prickled across my skin. I didn’t want this. That scene should have felt utterly revolting. But no matter what my mind said, my body only burned hotter. My instincts were telling me exactly what to do. If I wanted relief, if I wanted release, I needed to let the fever out.
God damn it.
I clawed my fingers through my hair, but finally, cursing inwardly, I roughly unfastened my pants and shoved my hand inside. My skin was so hot, and when I wrapped my fingers around my length and pulled it free from my pants, I was already throbbingly, inescapably hard.
You sick fuck.
Turning my body around, I leaned my back against the side of the bed. I gripped myself and stroked—an unmistakable jolt of pleasure shot through my hips.
“Ah!”
I couldn’t contain my voice as it spilled from my lips. With just one single stroke, clear, slick precum was already welling up and dripping from the tip. This was a pleasure I’d known long before I’d become a villain. I didn’t need to be told what would feel good—I already knew exactly what to do next.
Ha ha... So this is when Heinreid finally starts to feel like a human being?
Frustrated and desperate, I smeared my fingers across the precum beading at the tip and spread it down my shaft. Once I was better lubricated, I tightened my grip and picked up the pace. Squelching noises—slippery, wet, obscene—filled my ears, and my brain shut down as I lost myself in the sensation.
“Ngh... Guh... Nn!”
Despite all of that, I couldn’t quite manage to push myself over the edge. My body and brain were both filled to bursting with pleasure, but somewhere deep inside me, my lingering intellect wouldn’t let me climax.
I knew exactly why. It was because of what was getting me off. This body had unmistakably gotten aroused from harming others and witnessing their suffering. I’d tormented a good and righteous man—and my libido had rejoiced in the anguish on his face and found ecstasy in his hatred. That was just how Heinreid’s body was built.
But right now, the consciousness inside it was my own. However much my body was conditioned to respond this way, I couldn’t shake my revulsion at the prospect of letting that bring me to orgasm. My instincts and my intellect were locked in conflict as I writhed in agony.
I want to cum. I don’t want to fall. I want to cum. I don’t want to fall...
I focused on the head, furiously tugging and squeezing, but I still couldn’t crest that final wave. I was stuck on the edge, gasping and groaning.
Damn it...
If only I could get off to something else, anything else. But no matter how far back I went through Heinreid’s memories, all I could dredge up was atrocity after atrocity... Once I started to recall it all, I couldn’t get it to stop.
As I shook my head frantically, trying to push back the rushing torrent of blood-soaked visions, my eyes caught on my nightstand—on the single rose adorning it.
I...
The past came flowing back into me. I remembered that garden of sin and depravity, sealed off from the world—and the scent of roses, filling every corner.
Frantically clutching at those faint scraps of memory, I shoved one hand into my open shirt and dragged my fingers across my chest. I found what I was looking for, and I gingerly scratched at it with a fingernail.
I gasped.
“Hhhh! Ngh!”
The intense sensation shocked me, and my legs straightened with a jolt.
Oh, wow... Heinreid’s never experienced this before. How’s his body this sensitive? No, this is good. This’ll work.
“Ohhh, nnn... Haaa, ah!”
I kept toying with my nipple, tracing it, then pinching it between my fingertips. I was only playing with myself, but sweet ecstasy spread through my entire body. More and more precum started pouring out, almost as if my lower half was demanding more of my attention. I reached down, jerking myself off with frenzied strokes, and eventually my legs started to shudder and shake.
Ah, right there... I’m so...close...
I tried to lose myself in that lustrous reverie, to let it carry me over the edge. But at the last second, a villainous memory slipped back in to obscure it.
“Was that...to your satisfaction, Your Grace?”
“Nnn!”
That hatred-tinged green filled my mind once again. But even as I recoiled and shrank away from it, my trembling finger violently clawed at the head of my member, digging into the slit, while my other hand gripped my nipple tightly and twisted.
“Hhhhgh, aaauh!”
I was already too far gone for my intellect to hold me back. My toes curled—my body shuddered and twitched. Hot, cloudy cum gushed out in intermittent splurts, leaving my hand soiled.
Amid the overwhelming pleasure, a single teardrop rolled down my cheek.
“Hhh...”
As my shaky breathing slowed, my body slumped limply against the bed.
Well, I’m feeling calmer, at least. I mean, masturbation just tends to leave you kind of hollow when the clarity hits, but still, I’ve never felt this defeated before. I jerked off to my ex, and then I ended up coming to Craig? God, I owe both of them the biggest apology of my life. I hate myself.
As I stewed in that sinking, guilty feeling, I pulled a handkerchief out of my pocket and wiped off my hand. I straightened out my disheveled clothes—and then realized that the door to my room was slightly ajar.
Wait, what? Did... Did I forget to close the door?! Hang on, you’ve gotta be kidding me! Sure, I was pretty messed up, but there’s no way I... Shit, I can’t remember what I did when I came in.
Every trace of afterglow immediately vanished, leaving me starkly sober.
No, it’s fine. I told Karl to leave me alone, and the regular servants never come near my room. Craig’s busy handling the cleanup at the Pieira, so he shouldn’t be back yet either... Probably.
Grimacing, I softly crept over to the door. I quietly peeked out, but there was no one around. I sighed with relief and slammed the door shut. Then, at that exact moment, someone’s voice rang out from the last place I would’ve expected—right inside the room with me.
“Well, Heinreid,” the voice said with a laugh. “Looks like you chased him off. Honestly, though—going at it the moment you returned? Even I was at something of a loss, I have to say.”
With the biggest jolt yet today—no, the biggest of my entire life—my heart leaped out of my chest.
It was a deep voice, one that sent tremors running directly through your brain. I knew that voice. Heinreid’s memories told me exactly who it belonged to. With awkward, creaking movements like a rusted windup toy, I slowly turned toward the speaker.
“How... How long have you been there...my liege?”
With a low, throaty chuckle, the voice’s owner stepped out from the shadows behind the large mirror. His mismatched blue and gold eyes were narrowed in amusement, and a loose bundle of long, beautiful hair spilled over one of his shoulders like silver thread. This fair and elegant man with a cruel, callous smile and a nigh-overpowering presence was none other than the final boss himself—His Majesty King Eberhart, ruler of Amagis.