My past life—or maybe I should call it my life before the last one? I wasn’t really sure. Either way, I was the author of this story, and I’d suddenly died in that dingy little apartment in Japan. Then, a stuck-up man who claimed to be a god popped up out of nowhere and said, “You’re going to be reincarnated.”
I’d just died, so the idea of reincarnation made no sense to me at all. But before even giving me a chance to think about it, the self-proclaimed god continued. “There’s someone who wants you to grant their wish,” he said.
“Grant a wish? I don’t have that kind of power. And even if I did, why should I? If anything, I’m the one whose wishes need to be granted!”
I’d prayed to the gods so many times when I was alive, and not once had my prayers been answered. So why should I grant someone else’s wish? I was furious and demanded an answer.
“If you do not grant the wish, you’ll die,” the god had said.
“What? That’s ridiculous! First you force me to be reincarnated, then threaten to kill me if I don’t obey you?”
“No, I won’t be the one to kill you. But you will die all the same.”
“That’s the same damn thing! You can forget it. I’m not doing it!”
“You used to write novels, didn’t you? I actually read a few of them. Hrm, yes... It seems experience is important after all. Before you’re fully reincarnated, how about I let you have that experience? You get to live in the world of your own novel. You’re incredibly lucky!” the god said.
“Hey, listen to me! I said I’m not going to do it!”
But the selfish jerk refused to listen. And before I knew it, I’d been shoved straight into reincarnation completely without my consent.
The god had claimed I was lucky to be able to experience the world of my novel, but I hadn’t even been reincarnated as the protagonist!
Nope, instead I’d come back as one of the final boss’s minions.
Now, at this point it should be clear that the final boss is none other than Siegfried, Kreis’s beloved.
And I’d been reincarnated as Kreis, a villain who dies at the hands of the protagonist and his allies during the climax of the story. I couldn’t believe it. I’d been reincarnated as some unimportant NPC who served the final boss.
Who the hell came up with such a ridiculous story, anyway?
Oh, right. That was me.
I’d started writing this BL novel on a whim. I’d met another writer online who’d hit it big in the BL market. After writing nothing but light novels, I figured I’d give it a try. A story had popped into my head, so I’d jotted it down and posted it on the internet.
Obviously something written so haphazardly wasn’t going to be popular. Far from it. The readers had absolutely roasted it. But now I understood their reactions all too well.
A story like this never had a chance in the first place. It was horrible! I’d lived Kreis’s life with my memories sealed, living and dying as him. And if I’d known the truth from the start, I would’ve punched myself in the face.
It was a horrible world and a horrible story. Knowing I was the one who’d come up with it all made me want to bash my head into a wall.
However, there were numerous details between this world and the novel I wrote that were different. I wasn’t sure why. But there was one thing I did understand: Before I was reincarnated, the arrogant self-proclaimed god told me there was someone who wanted me to grant their wish. And that someone was the original owner of this body.
Kreis had had one final wish before he died. “Give me the chance for revenge.”
He wanted vengeance, and now it seemed that mission was up to me.
My mind was still reeling. I couldn’t quite believe this was real. But the raw sensation of death still lingered on my body, refusing to let me forget.
They killed me.
I opened the nightstand drawer beside the bed and took out the diary Kreis had diligently kept every day.
“I knew it.”
After I flipped through the pages, I discovered my hunch had been right. The story hadn’t begun yet. In other words, it was still possible to change its course from this point forward.
That was right. The most important thing now wasn’t that it was Kreis who stood here, but that I was now Kreis. The one who’d lived his life and written the whole story to begin with. And now I was here, in this place, at the beginning when it was still possible to change it all.
But why me? That doubt lingered in my mind. But the arrogant god was clear that if I couldn’t grant Kreis’s wish, I would die.
Kreis was destined to die in this story, so if I didn’t take action, the only future waiting for me was death. Being forced down this path without my consent was uncomfortable. But I wasn’t going to just wait in silence and get killed without doing anything to try to stop it.
So I have no choice, I thought. Just then...
Crreeaaak...
The door to my room swung open without so much as a knock.
“How long are you planning on staying in bed, you good-for-nothing?!” Elly, one of the Louboutin family’s maids, barged in and demanded. She was tall and scrawny, and though she always put on a sweet smile for Kreis’s father, she did nothing but talk badly about him behind his back. She was comfortable doing so in front of Kreis because she knew his relationship to his father.
She always wore her frizzy red hair in braids, hoping to appeal to Kreis’s younger brother, Gilles. As if he’d ever fall for a maid.
Elly’s face reflected her nasty temperament. If someone told me she was the personification of a terrible personality, I’d believe it. Some say one’s ugliness is reflected in their appearance as they grow older, and Elly was proof of that.
I stared at her silently, and a moment later a pillow came flying at me.
“Stop staring at me! Who do you think you are?”
I couldn’t hold it in. I burst out laughing, clutching my stomach. “Who do I think I am? Please! Ha ha ha!”
“What’s so funny? Have you finally lost your mind?”
How could I not laugh? Kreis was the oldest son of a marquess and heir to the family, but he was being openly mocked by a maid.
Although that wasn’t surprising, given how things had been.
Kreis had always been a pitiful person. His parents had quarreled since he was born, then his half brother had appeared out of nowhere. Gilles was a child his father had with another woman, and he had joined the household at the age of five. Their father doted on him excessively, perhaps because he’d been frail since birth.
Gilles got whatever he wanted. If Kreis got a birthday gift and Gilles wanted it, it was now his. Everything that belonged to Kreis, including his bedroom, his meals, and his friends, was turned over to Gilles the moment he asked for it.
Their father was cold to Kreis. So was his mother, but at least she was equal in her treatment of both sons. The pain of being singled out by his father was far worse for Kreis. Eventually his mother couldn’t stand the fighting anymore and moved back to their estate in the royal capital, leaving Kreis behind. He was the heir, after all, so he couldn’t leave. However, the household servants looked down on him after his mother abandoned him.
He was expected to be the perfect heir, and any mistake brought harsh reprimands down upon him. But as even the servants started foisting their work upon him, Kreis gradually lost any status he had in the Louboutin household.
“Hurry up and get ready!” Elly barked. She was demanding that he get started on work that should’ve been done by the household staff. At some point, it had become Kreis’s duty to wake up early in the morning and fetch water from the well. And in the cold months, carrying water was a difficult task. Just filling and hauling the buckets full of the icy water left his hands raw and chapped. The frostbite could turn dangerous if left untreated.
I looked down at my hands. They certainly weren’t the hands of a noble. They were absolutely ugly, covered in calluses and broken skin. Even more beat-up than the hands of any servant. That was why Kreis always wore gloves in public.
“How long are you going to ignore me?! Do you want me to whip you?” Elly shrieked in her annoying voice. And the old Kreis would’ve obeyed immediately.
“I’m sorry! Right away!” he would’ve said, and rushed from the room.
That had been his daily life ever since he was seven years old and Gilles joined their household. Now that he was over twenty, he had just given up and was used to swallowing his pride and enduring it.
But...
“Whip me? Who the hell do you think you are?”
That was the old Kreis.
I raked a hand through my messy hair and glared at Elly, who flinched under my intimidating gaze. She took a step backward and yelled louder to cover up her own embarrassment.