⦿⦿⦿
“What’s gotten into you, Felix?!” I whined once I was out of earshot of the Leeuwenhoek manor.
As I trudged along the path, I thought back to the words I’d spat out earlier and heaved a sigh.
“But you’ve always been kind to me. Why are you being so mean now?”
It was true. Felix had been nice to me ever since we’d first met. In fact, he was the only person who was nice to me.
Well, he introduced me to Kain when I was older, and Kain is pretty nice to me too, but that’s not the point right now.
I, Alice, was the third child born to Count Rohans. My elder brother, the family heir, had a brilliant mind, and my elder sister excelled in magic. Naturally, my parents, my siblings, and everyone associated with our family had high expectations for me too.
However, unlike my brother and sister, I was not a prodigy. I wasn’t incompetent either, but as a child, I hadn’t known that.
I could use magic. I was decent at studying. I understood the things I was taught, and I was curious. I was capable of expressing a wide variety of emotions. But since my siblings had set the bar so high, my competencies fell short in my parents’ eyes.
Do you know how it felt to be seen as a worthless child even though I had no particular failings? Little me was innocent and pure, which was why I immediately noticed that my parents looked at me in a different way than they did my siblings. I also realized that although they never scolded me, I was the only one they never once praised. And I sensed that their ever-present air of dissatisfaction was somehow my fault, even though I hadn’t done anything wrong.
Can you possibly imagine how it felt to realize that the strange expression that was always directed at me was one of disappointment? My exceptional siblings had made the normal me a failure.
But Felix was different. Felix told me that being normal was a wonderful thing...because he himself wasn’t. I didn’t know what he meant by that at the time, but I was so happy to be praised and treated nicely that I instantly fell in love with him. He was the one who turned my normalcy into something special.
After that, I woke back up to my true self. The real me wasn’t a pushover who would curl up in dejection over being treated as a worthless child.
One day, I’ll become special too, and then my family will see what they missed out on!
This time, it was I who turned my back on my parents and siblings. I began following Felix and Kain around, who doted on me like a younger sister. Even my real brother and sister hadn’t done that!
Eager as I was to pursue specialness, sometimes I would do something reckless and put myself in danger. Each time, Felix was the first to come to my rescue.
That was when I realized two things: One, Felix and I were meant to be. Two, Felix was special, so he was surely the next Champion of Destiny. In which case, it fell to me to support him by his side!
Felix insisted he wasn’t special. He also began reminding me at every opportunity that he thought of me as a younger sister. But I was sure that one day, he would come to love me as a woman. Because I was his fated wife!
But then...Lucille showed up.
Well, no.
Honestly, I knew this had nothing to do with Lucille. Felix’s change in attitude had been a gradual process—one that had begun long before his engagement. I just didn’t want to admit it because he was the only person who had ever acknowledged me and treated me kindly.
I once complained about it to Kain, who replied, “You have me too, don’t you?” But Kain was close with too many women. Being special to him wasn’t much of an accomplishment.
Even though Felix was treating me more coldly, I was still the only woman he addressed without honorifics—a fact I used to convince myself I was special. But now...
“He called her Lucille...”
What’s gotten into him?!
“If he’s not nice to me, then I hate him!”
I also hate Kain! He’s nice to every girl in the world, but he won’t get mad at Felix on my behalf! And I hate Lucille for having Felix call her by name even though she’s an unwanted fiancée that got forced on him for a stupid reason!
I bet they all think of me as a child just because I’m a bit younger than them! They think I don’t matter because I’m just a kid! That’s why no one chased after me...
“I also hate my family for not loving me. I hate everyone!”
As I was walking around, spewing angry words to distract me from my sorrow, Lucille’s smiling face came to mind. Even though I had shown up unannounced at her house and yelled at her, she had happily listened to my stories without getting upset at all.
Actually, I hate myself the most for directing my anger at her when I know she’s a nice person.
I’m a bad girl, and bad things happen to bad girls.
“N-No way!”
My destination had been the forest I often ran away to when I was a child. It was supposed to be a peaceful and quiet place. After all, it had been safe enough for a little girl to hide in by herself.
However, as I sat hugging my knees, I was encompassed by a large shadow. Looking up at its source revealed something I had only ever seen in books.
“Why is there a dragon here?!”
Is this punishment for being a bad girl who hurt someone because I wanted to be special?
“Eek!”
In the dragon’s red eyes, my reflection grew as it faced me. Was I going to die here?!
No, I don’t want to die!
Just as I was about to sink into despair, I heard a voice.
“Meooow? Jack, you said she was this way, right?! Lady Alice! Where are you?!”