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As the light died down, the town came into view. The streets were cobbled and lined with wooden buildings, just like in a fantasy world. I saw other players thronging the area and carrying equipment of all kinds, and I got a strong sense of being inside a video game.
“Oh, I get it... This must be Starting Town!”
Modern VR games are insane! Not only did everything look real, everything from the hubbub of the town to the smell of good food in the air felt genuine. I can’t get over this level of quality! I bet I’d have a great time just strolling around!
I was busy gawking at the scenery when a voice called out to me. “Hey there, miss! Hey, miss!”
Huh? Miss...? Well, he can’t mean me.
I ignored the voice completely until I felt a hand grab my shoulder. Surprised, I turned around to find a muscular bald man with tanned skin looking right at me.
“Eek! A wild barbarian appeared?!”
Baldy looked offended. “I’m no barbarian! Little rude, doncha think, miss?!”
Why is he looking at me and saying, “miss”?! Uhh, hold on... My voice does sound kinda high, and isn’t that feeling on my back my hair reaching down to my waist? Don’t tell me...
“Hey, Baldy! What do I look like?!”
“Uh... You’ve got silver hair, red eyes, and I guess, in so many words...you look like a well-to-do young lady.”
Pbbbt?! Whaaaaat?! I’m a lady?!
I ran to a nearby fountain and stared down at the water. The reflection looking back at me belonged to a beautiful girl, gorgeous in every way but her dead eyes. She was wearing a simple black dress that looked like a starting outfit, and it happened to suit her silver hair perfectly.
I nervously raised my hands and put them to my pale cheeks. Sure enough, the girl reflected on the water’s surface made the same gesture.
“Huh?! How’d this happen to me?!” I screamed with a woman’s voice.
Baldy leaped with fright at my sudden shouting. “Wh-What’s wrong?”
A few minutes later...
“Bwah ha ha ha ha! So the randomizer turned you into a flawless silver-haired, red-eyed hottie?! You’re hilarious, Yuri!”
“Well, I’m not laughing!” I tore at my pretty silver hair. “Gah! My bad luck never left me!”
Baldy wouldn’t stop chortling like an idiot, and this current burst of laughter was just the latest in a long series.
After we’d gotten talking, I gave him a full recap while we sat on the edge of the fountain. First he’d laughed when I told him I was playing the game to escape my bad luck, then he’d laughed even harder when I’d told him that the randomizer had turned me into a girl. Once I’d told him I’d chosen the summoner class and the bow, he was in stitches.
What’s with this guy? Does he get off on laughing at other people’s misfortune?! “Yeah, get a good laugh, jerk! I don’t see what’s so funny about my class or weapon though. Sure, my avatar turned out weird, but summoner and bow is the best possible choice! The online guide said so!”
“Pffffft! Hate to break it to you, Yuri, but that’s a lie spread by trolls.”
“Huh?”
“That guide’s a wiki. Anyone can put a bunch of lies on there. In reality, summoner’s a weak class with no upsides, and the bow sucks ’cause it can’t hit a damn thing.”
“What...? Whaaaaaaaat?!”
No, no, no! This can’t be right! Not only do I look like a girl, but my build totally sucks too?!
“Ha ha ha! Usually some Good Samaritan comes along to fix the vandalism, but it takes them a while to notice. You must have checked the site in the few minutes before it got fixed!”
“But th-that would be...the worst possible luck!” Curse my unbelievable misfortune! It won’t even let me enjoy video games! I checked that site a bunch of times, and it always recommended summoner and the bow! Don’t tell me...the vandalism was always timed for exactly when I was looking at the site?! Gaaaaaaaaaaah!
As my shoulders slumped, Baldy placed his hand on my back in an apparent show of sympathy...except no, he was getting ready to kick me while I was down! “As a former beta tester, let me share a little wisdom with you: A pure luck build...is pure garbage.”
“Garbage?!”
“Now, now, hear me out. Your luck stat mostly affects how often your skills trigger and the drop rates for rare items. It does also help a little with critical hits, though. That’s when you hit an enemy’s head or heart and get a small chance to deal triple damage. The higher your luck, the more often you’ll get that critical damage boost.”
“Ooh. So if I focus-fire on enemy vitals, I’ll be unstoppable, right? I know some shots might miss, but with these stats, I’ve gotta land a few lucky hits...right?”
“Nope. Hit rate is purely a matter of player skill. Speaking of which, here’s a question for you, Yuri. Think you can hit anything with a bow? Have you had any archery training? And even if you have, remember, we’re talking about moving targets here.”
Wh-What?! This can’t be happening! “There’s no way I’ll hit anything! I barely know how to hold a bow! Every shot’s gonna fly a mile wide without aim assist!”
“Thought so. Any noob can swing a sword around and hit something, but a bow’s useless unless you’ve got the skills. And that’s why everyone calls the bow trash. Mind you, even if you were a pro archer, it wouldn’t matter with those stats of yours. The more powerful the bow, the more rigid it is, and the more strength it takes to draw. With 0 strength, you’re stuck with the starter bow, and that thing’s a piece of junk!”
J-Junk?! My stats are garbage, and my weapon’s worthless junk?! But what about my class? What’s so wrong with being a summoner?!
“And then there’s your class,” Baldy continued. “Summoners are a sorry bunch.”
“They are?!”
“Yep. The whole idea is that you get to control some friendly monsters, but you’ve gotta jump through some hoops beforehand. First, you’ve gotta tame a monster by defeating it entirely by yourself. If anyone helps you out, taming fails automatically. And then, even if you do somehow beat an enemy, taming rarely succeeds. Then there’s the arts system... Summoners don’t get any arts for boosting damage output. If you’d picked, say, the fighter class with a bladed weapon, you could’ve dished out big damage with the Giga Slash art. But you’re a summoner, so that means your arts are limited to buffing summoned monsters. What I’m trying to say is you’re gonna be helpless with no party to back you up.”
“Whaaaat? So to tame my first monster, I’ve gotta fight it solo using nothing but my nonexistent bow skills? And even then, it’s gonna take a few tries?”
“Pretty much. With sensible stats and a decent weapon, you could’ve at least handled the rabbits hopping around the Starting Plain. Not that taming trash enemies is gonna get you anywhere. Not with that build.”
This bald jerk sure wants me to know it’s my own fault! Yeah, I get it! It’s all ’cause I picked trash stats and a garbage weapon! And now those rabbits are gonna nibble me to death ’cause I’ve got 0 defense! I heaved a deep sigh. I’m used to bad luck, but this takes the cake...
“Cheer up, Yuri!” Baldy patted my shoulder. “You can just make a new character! Though it’ll be a shame to lose the hot avatar. You’re like a piece of fine art that only the AI could’ve made! Every inch of your body’s fine-tuned, and yet none of it looks overworked or unnatural! And just look at those big, round boobies!”
“Like that’s gonna do me any good! I’m just gonna get— Wait, why’d you start talking to me in the first place?”
“Huh? Oh, you know... I wanted to hit on you, obviously! You know the game’s avatars are based on our real faces, right? Anyone with a hot avatar like yours ought to be a hot girl in real life! Why’d you have to go and be a dude?!”
I finally snapped. “Get over it, moron!” We came to blows, both knowing that we couldn’t damage each other here in town. But that didn’t stop us from trying!