Mitsuru Mochizuki’s Fears
“HELLO, Mitsuru. Glad to see you’re well.”
“Been a while. Yeah, not much has changed.”
The sight of all those brightly colored dresses, mixed with the blended smell of makeup, perfume, and alcohol, lingered in my nostrils. This scene never changed, in neither prosperous times nor economic failure.
This was how I spent these boring parties, listening to people flatter me or tell me not to be modest. I eventually tried to dodge the endless stream of pleasantries.
This was all a standard part of my social regimen, and I’d been coming since I was little, so I was used to it, but I still found it dull. I looked around, hoping my usual friends were there at least, before electing to hole up in a corner without mingling with the crowd.
“You’re all a bunch of buffoons,” I said under my breath and clicked my tongue as I finally found them.
“Sorry, Mitsuru.”
“If you’re really sorry, then come with me. It’s not fair you guys are messing around and I’m out here all by myself.”
It irritated me that Oboro apologized in word only. He didn’t seem very sorry.
“We’d love to, but we’re busy ourselves...”
“We can’t exactly leave our little Moon Princess to his own devices, now can we?”
Kogetsu was standing there, that sullen look on his face failing to deter all the eyes that were exclusively on him.
That wasn’t his usual aloof gaze that merely kept people at a distance. I could feel the anger coming off him.
He heaved a sigh.
That must have been it. Today was the first round of that Ojousama Contest or whatever it was he had gotten himself into.
“Fine, I’ll keep an eye on him, so you all get out there.”
“Thanks, Mitsuru,” Ui said with a resigned shrug, and they all scattered. They had their own responsibilities as sons and heirs to their respective families.
Normally, Kogetsu would be fine on his own, but we had to keep people from getting too close. Clearly, he was having an especially difficult time focusing tonight.
I approached Kogetsu to warn him not to let anyone near.
“Pull it together. Are you going to let everything fall apart over something little like this?”
I doubted that was likely to happen, but I warned him just the same.
“...Don’t be ridiculous. Just who do you think you’re talking to?” He responded in an icy tone, immediately straightening up.
He was wearing his trademark butterfly kimono, looking stunning as usual, just as one would expect of the perfect Chouko Tsukuyomi. Except...for me, it was different.
“You know...you’re my most important friend.”
He glanced at me once more with a quizzical look.
“So I’ll help you win whatever competition you want, no matter how ridiculous. I just can’t stand to see you lose. It hurts, and it makes me mad. But the thing that irritates me most is seeing you take on a challenge you don’t intend to win.”
“But I did win today...”
“But that was because Oboro picked you over Aritomo for her own good.”
For people like us, improving a store-bought lunch the way she did counted as skilled. Oboro only declared her the loser to make her reflect on her actions, as she was clearly aware she had cheated. That was all.
You didn’t earn that victory.
Don’t look down on Chouko Tsukuyomi. Isn’t this the persona you built up? So much so that you stopped using the name Kogetsu?
“I’m sure that girl, Tendou, feels the same? She must have felt uneasy. Wondering why you weren’t even trying, so in the end...”
“Shut up! Shut up, shut up, shut up!”
It had been ages since I had seen him yell like that. Back before taking up the part of the unflappable Chouko Tsukuyomi, back when he was Kogetsu, he would sometimes have outbursts like this. He even stopped having them in our presence... My head ached trying to figure out just how obsessed he was with this Tendou girl.
However, his tantrum had immediately quieted the venue. Shirazu and the others all came charging over to us in a panic. Among them was Saku. I hadn’t seen him all day, so I hadn’t realized he would be here.
Oh crap. I put my hand to my head, realizing things were going from bad to worse. Kogetsu must have picked up on my tension, as his face soured even further.
“I’m leaving,” he said and immediately headed for the door. Oboro saw and chased after him, but to me, it didn’t matter.
What mattered now was restoring the festive mood. I couldn’t very well tell our guests the outburst was their beloved Chouko Tsukuyomi shouting “Shut up” over and over again. If I did, it would hurt me as well, so I merely gave them a bitter smile.
“I’m sorry, I was the one who upset her. I was bringing up the past...things one shouldn’t say to a lady, I suppose.”
As soon as I said that, the wheels in my head turned. Just as I anticipated, all the old folks started speaking at once.
“Mitsuru is still so immature.”
“Hahaha.”
At least the din of the party had returned.
I breathed a sigh of relief as Shirazu and Saku headed my way, hoping for an explanation. I evaded them.
Ui handed me a drink and toasted me for my efforts as I drained it in one go. I was exhausted already.
I’d had my suspicions for a while, but now I was sure.
Kogetsu was in love with Urara Tendou. Probably far deeper and for far longer than I ever realized.
Was this his first love? I had no idea, but if this was the form it took, no wonder it had such a dramatic hold on him. It was unreasonable for him to expect to continue passing as a female like this forever. He was getting taller and his voice was starting to deepen.
But we really only had to wait a little longer.
All I wanted was for him to hang on until the Full Moon Festival.
I begged him, as a friend.
✦ ✦ ✦
☾☾☾
I spent Sunday in a fog of feelings I couldn’t seem to sort through.
“I’ve never seen you dawdle like this before. Are you okay?”
“Mm-hmm. You can have the rest of my food if you want.”
I had tried to keep my emotions from showing on my face, but the gloom surrounding me managed to seep through, worrying my family. Kirara was concerned; Haruto bought me snacks.
I felt worthless as an older sister. But...