Even though he doesn’t like masks that expose his mouth, he’s not telling me to leave…, Sara thought, watching Richard. He was eating his cake and avoiding looking in her direction.
She took her fork and cut off the end of her slice. It seemed denser than the butter cakes in Saleilles—crumbly instead of fluffy. The finely chopped dried marlo were about to fall off Sara’s fork, so she quickly plopped it into her mouth and chewed. Her mouth exploded with the sweetness of the butter and sugar and the tartness of the marlo as her nose was filled with the scent of the rico liqueur.
“It’s so delicious!”
“Do you…like sweets?”
Sara was caught off guard—she had never expected Richard to initiate conversation.
She looked up, surprised. She noticed his fingers were interlaced and that he was looking at her with a very serious expression. He still had half of his own slice of cake left, but he was leaving it untouched, waiting for her response.
Didn’t Daniel say His Highness had a sweet tooth?
After taking a few moments to think it over, Sara nodded.
“I do. For my snacks and meals, I prefer sweetness to spiciness and bitterness.”
“I see…”
“……”
…Oh no! The conversation will die off unless I say something! she realized.
Before the prince could look away from her again, Sara leaned forward and asked, “Do you like sweet foods, Your Highness?”
After a moment’s hesitation, he answered. “…I don’t hate them.”
His answer wasn’t quite what Daniel had told her…
But even in Saleilles, a surprising number of people thought it was “unmanly” to like sweet foods, so perhaps Richard’s male pride was getting in the way of the truth.
I’ll try to meet him halfway instead of pressing the point too much…
“Is that right? I’d just be thrilled if we had the same tastes. Come to think of it, I find Ferrier’s food much more refreshing than Saleilles’s, don’t you agree?”
“…All of Saleilles’s dishes are far too strong, in my opinion. I assumed you wouldn’t like our cuisine, if that’s the sort of food you were used to, but…it appears I was mistaken.”
The conversation is rolling smoothly. Excellent!
“The food here is more lightly seasoned,” said Sara, “but there’s a natural sweetness to it that makes it seem healthier, so I like it. I even feel like my skin has improved since coming here!”
She wasn’t just blowing hot air, either. Even Claire had pointed out that Sara’s skin had been looking more radiant, and Sara herself had noticed she felt physically better than she had in Saleilles.
This was probably partly because she had been freed from the physical and mental restraints she had been under in Saleilles, but she thought the food was a large part of it, too.
This was why she had so casually brought up the topic of her skin. She had been sure the prince would just respond with a noncommittal “I see.”
But instead, he looked at her for some time, his mouth open, before very quickly turning away. Not a second later, just as Richard’s wavy hair was swaying from the motion, his elbow smashed against his desk with a dull thud. Sara heard Daniel and Claire gasp from the back of the room.
“Your Highness?!” Sara asked. “Are you okay?!”
“I-I’m all right. I’m sorry.”
“No—I mean—there’s nothing to apologize for… Did something happen?”
She couldn’t remember saying anything that would make him jerk away in such a panic that he would smash his elbow against the desk.
But for some reason, he just sat there, his right hand covering his mouth, his left hand pressed over his forehead, eyes glued to the floor.
It all looked very strange put together, but Sara knew it would be very insensitive to point that out, so she quietly gulped and waited for the prince to speak.
“Brazenly staring at a woman’s skin… That was shameful of me to do. I apologize if I made you uncomfortable. I’m very sorry.”
“…What?”
He apologized again, but there was nothing she could have done to prevent it—she needed more time to work through what he was saying.
“…What are you talking about?”
“I thought…my looking at you would make you uncomfortable…”
“Of course it wouldn’t! It’s not like that would be the end of the world… I mean, we’re husband and wife, right?”
“…Oh.”
He totally forgot…
At this point, Sara was, if anything, impressed. She watched Richard closely. The prince seemed to have just inexplicably forgotten that the woman in front of him was his own wife. When their eyes met, he held his head with both hands. His forehead and ears, though hidden by his mask and hair, were almost certainly bright red.
“That’s…that’s true, but…we don’t have that sort of relationship, and…you’re my wife, but we don’t…”
“Your Highness…”
“I mean—you really don’t dislike me staring at you? You don’t feel repulsed or sickened or anything like that?”
Richard sounded genuinely concerned. Seeing this unexpected side of her husband, Sara felt her heart swell slightly—but then it sank in horror.
What in the world has the prince been through…?
There wasn’t a woman alive who would feel disgusted at being looked at by Richard, a man both handsome and intelligent enough to carry out official duties as a member of the royal family. He may have looked grumpy in his portrait, but if he were to soften his face and smile, he would transform into a prince who could make any lady swoon.
Richard was unnaturally self-abasing, he had no confidence in himself, and he was frightened of other people.
Sara didn’t have the greatest confidence, either. She had spent six years of her life believing she was Hermine’s “extra,” which had even made her think it was a good thing to not have any self-confidence.
But she couldn’t help feeling like something was odd about Richard’s self-deprecation. There must have been some reason for him to turn out this way—something that had caused him to become an introverted recluse.
And then there’s his mother, the king’s concubine… Maybe something happened that I can’t even imagine.
Sara’s heart broke to see Richard like this, probably shouldering this unimaginable reason on his own.
Sara looked down and took a deep breath. It was like she was dealing with a frightened animal—if she barreled toward it or forced it into her arms, it would only become more terrified.
She simply had to adopt a “wait patiently” tactic until the frightened animal approached her. If it did, she would hold it gently, and if it rejected her, she would calmly back off.
“I feel the total opposite of repulsed. I feel happy.”
“Happy?”
“Yes. I’m happy that you were looking at me. I know I’m not the bride you wanted… But you looked at me, so I’m happy.”
On that first day, Richard had let her down gently, telling her not to get involved with him. But she now knew that he hadn’t said that because he hated her or loathed her for being the princess of Saleilles.
He had been scared of her.
He didn’t know anything about her, which was frightening. When their eyes met, he simply had no idea what to say, which was why he had been trying to avoid her from the very beginning. He had assumed he had disgusted her by looking at her impolitely, so he had apologized.
Daniel had been right—Richard was overly differential and very kind.
Sara would bet anything that Richard had resolved to never hurt anyone else because he himself had been hurt in the past.
But these are just my own speculations… If I were to tactlessly bring any of this up to him, it might make him feel cornered or upset.
Sara put a hand over her chest and gazed steadily at the prince.
“In fact, I wish you would look at me more… Only if it’s not disagreeable to you, of course.”
“I—I don’t find it disagreeable… But even if we are husband and wife, isn’t it rude to look at someone so boldly?”
“Is it? I can’t speak for everyone, but you don’t have to worry about that with me. I’m not troubled over something so trivial,” Sara declared proudly, pushing her shoulders back.
It wasn’t just that being looked at by Richard wouldn’t bother her. She wanted to get closer to him, so it would be warmly welcomed! She wanted him to look at her even more, so long as it didn’t verge into the realm of indecency, even by her standards.
She enthusiastically began to tell him as much, but halfway through, Richard groaned and collapsed on his desk.
“I-I get it, I get it… Please don’t push the point too hard.”
“What? Oh…all right. I’m very sorry if I said something improper.”
“No, it…it doesn’t really bother me. But please, don’t say those sorts of things to anyone else. Saying you want to be stared at…only say that to me. Okay?”
Richard’s words had so much feeling behind them, Sara could barely believe they had been spoken by the reverential prince. But he seemed really out of sorts about it, so she quickly nodded in agreement.
“I-I understand, Your Highness. You’re the only one who can stare at me…right?”
“Th-That’s right. Keep that in mind.”
“Right. I will,” said Sara, suddenly becoming hugely embarrassed.
They each picked a different spot of the floor to look at.
Wh-What’s going on? My heart’s going nuts…
Sara didn’t need a hand to her chest to feel her heart as it beat wildly against her rib cage and reverberated throughout her entire body. She never thought she was one of those girls who blushed easily, but her face and ears burned, and in opposite measure, her palms broke out in a cold sweat.
I—I have to say something to break the tension! Let’s see… Oh!
“Y-Your Highness? Shall we finish the rest of our cake?”
“Yes. Right,” he said without lifting his head.
Then Claire, who seemed to have become one with the wall until that moment, stepped forward and reheated Richard’s teapot.
If you were watching that whole time, you should have lent me a hand…! Sara lamented with a sprinkle of resentment, shooting Claire a sidelong glance. But the maid just smiled brilliantly and avoided Sara’s gaze. When she finished reheating the teapot, she took her spot by Daniel’s side.
Daniel also donned an irritatingly bright smile, and when Sara caught his eye, he only mouthed “Good job!”
She would air her grievances to them later.
Both Sara and Richard had about half of their cake left. Coincidentally, they both used a fork to spear a piece and bring it to their mouths at the same time. The sweet aroma of tea and marlo gently wafted throughout the room.
“It’s so sweet and delicious, don’t you think?” Sara asked with a smile, her cheeks still quite warm.
“Yes…,” Richard muttered, his thin lips curved in a fraction of a smile. “It is sweet and delicious.”