Sayoko dabbed her eyes with her handkerchief. When she raised her face to meet Mia’s gaze, she clearly saw that her eyes were puffy and bloodshot.
“My father has never approved of my dating Misaki. He said that I’d never be happy if I married him. That marrying someone of different status, who views money differently, would only end in regret. So, the president of our partnering company would be better for me… Father said he would make me happy, and the future of our company would be secured. He asked me if I really wanted to put our workers out on the street…”
Mia crossed her arms over her chest in annoyance. She didn’t like how Sayoko was answering her question. Growing irritated, she cut in, “No, I’m not asking what your father said to you. I am asking if he knows how heartbroken you feel right now. If, knowing how you feel, he still insisted on arranging your marriage.”
“…I think he knows that I feel heartbroken right now.”
Mia, who finally got the answer she wanted, nodded. And then she winced, her face darkening. A father who wants to marry his daughter off despite knowing the effect it would have on her—how can he say that he’s only thinking of her happiness? If he really wanted her to be happy, he would let her marry the man she loves. Also, despite all his talk of how this was all for Sayoko’s sake, she couldn’t help but feel that he placed more importance on the company’s profits.
This really is unforgivable, Mia thought.
“Okay, but status and opinions about money do matter a lot. I can see that you come from a wealthy family. You’ve never had to work a day in your life, right? Misaki’s salary isn’t low by any means, but it’s not like he earns so much that he can throw money around. At the end of the day, he’s just a civil servant in a small provincial town. Your father’s misgivings are understandable,” Aya asserted bluntly.
Fresh tears formed in Sayoko’s eyes at her words. Aya, however, had no intention of tormenting her. She was trying to sound out her true motives and feelings by purposefully being harsh.
Sayoko pleaded, her voice thick with tears, “I know how much Misaki makes, we’ve been together for four years. I don’t care. He said he wanted us to live on his salary alone, but I was going to work too. But Misaki wouldn’t propose to me…”
Misaki couldn’t make up his mind about tying the knot with his girlfriend Sayoko. He couldn’t take that step when he thought how, even if he stole her away from her parents who opposed their relationship and married her, Sayoko wouldn’t be comfortable with the life he could provide for her.
Sayoko was in the same boat. She, too, felt stuck. The anxiety that would come with her lifestyle suddenly changing, her parents who didn’t approve of them being together. “Love conquers all” is something that only happens in books. Reality will inevitably start slipping in through the cracks. She could understand her father’s worry for her well-being, his concern for the company’s future. That was the reason why after agonizing over everything, she made the decision to break up with Misaki.
Aya, as if sensing that, sunk into silence, folding her arms. Mia, however, gave Sayoko a puzzled stare.
“Hey, what did you really come here to do? Did you come here to say goodbye to Misaki? Or did you come hoping he would propose to you?”
“Huh?” Sayoko and Aya uttered simultaneously.
Mia crossed her arms over her chest with an inscrutable expression on her face. “I found it weird when I was listening to your story… Despite saying that you have come here to break up with Misaki and talking about your father’s company, you mentioned that Misaki wouldn’t propose to you. What did you really want in the end? Did you want to part ways with him, or did you hope he’d say ‘marry me’ instead?”
Sayoko and Aya were struck dumb. Aya was the first one to recover, opening her mouth to say, “Wow, you don’t dress things up, do you, Mia? That’s me, the pot, calling the kettle black, of course, but you’re in a league of your own. …But you’re right. Sayoko, what kind of response did you expect from Misaki?”
“I… I, uh…” Sayoko lowered her eyes.
Mia kept cutting in mercilessly, pressing her for an answer, “Sayoko, if you really only wanted to say goodbye to him, surely you could do that over the phone or by texting? And yet you came all the way here from Kyoto, on a weekday, first thing in the morning. Misaki was on duty, so you came to his workplace. Why? Was there a reason for choosing to make this long journey just to break things off with him?”
Listening to Mia’s words, Sayoko realized what her true motive in coming was. Yes. Why had she come all this way, despite there being a multitude of ways she could’ve broken up with Misaki? …She panicked because she was pressed for time. That was why she had boarded the first train out of Kyoto. Because it had to be today. For tomorrow…
“…I-I’m really the worst… I should’ve realized this sooner! What a fool I am…” She whispered, spontaneously slipping back into her Kansai dialect.
Mia and Aya exchanged glances and quietly listened to Sayoko’s confession.
“I was testing Misaki. Some part of me hoped that if I told him my feelings, he woulda said the magic words. I tried to push the decision on him because I couldn’t bring myself to say ‘let’s get married’. Even though there was no way he would, not with how he always respects what I want. I was bein’ silly, thinking that if maybe I saw him face to face, he would… I’m terrible.” She hid her face in her hands.
The tears that had stopped flowing for a brief pause started trickling down her cheeks again, sobs wracking her small frame. Her heart-wrenching wails didn’t stop echoing in the waiting room for a long while.