The revolt was suppressed.
“Hello!” I called, dashing into the entryway of Hiro’s house.
“Gah!!” Then I collapsed forward on my face. My phone fell from my hand onto the Persian rug.
“Looks like we managed to escape the lion’s den.”
Hiro came out to greet me, tablet in hand. Chat notifications from our classmates were blowing up my phone lying on the rug. Hiro leaned against the wall and gave me a sour look.
“Life is harsh. If a sad sack like you tells some guy you like him, all hell breaks loose. If Ruka did the same thing, we’d probably achieve world peace no sweat,” she said.
My phone pinged with a text message. I picked it up and looked at what it said.
“It’s from Ruka.”
“For real?”
“It says, ‘Sorry to contact you out of the blue, but there’s something I want to ask you.’”
Hiro threw me a suspicious look. “Nice timing. Isn’t it weird that she just sent that text?”
“Weird?”
“She might be pulling the strings.”
“No way!”
“I bet she’s after Shinobu.”
“Why would a cute girl like her do a thing like this?”
“She’s so bad at that sort of stuff.”
“She just said she wants to talk because me and Shinobu are childhood friends.”
“Personally, I don’t think I’d be mature enough to help her out.”
I had no comeback for that. After all, I couldn’t rule out the possibility that Hiro’s suspicions were right.
I trudged home along the banks of the Kagami River. It was already evening.
The message from Ruka said she wanted to talk to me about someone she liked. I knew I had to respond, but I didn’t know what to say.
I was at a loss. My admiration for Ruka kept trading places with suspicion. I wanted to release the suffocating feeling in my chest.
“Urgh! My head’s spinning…”
Just then, I heard a splash and looked over at the water.
“……?”
Beneath the setting sun, the long, thin hull of a canoe was gliding over the river’s surface toward me.
It was Kamishin. The droplets flying from his paddle drew a clean arc through the air. His movements were sharp and efficient. In a flash, the canoe had passed me.
“…He’s really giving it his all,” I muttered to myself, only to hear someone answer.
“Sure is. He’s a go-getter.”
I turned in the speaker’s direction as slowly as humanly possible.
“……Shinobu.”
“I’ve been waiting for him, but he just won’t call it a day.”
Somehow, Shinobu was standing next to me, watching the canoe. I stared up at him, frozen in place.
“Suzu, did something happen today?” he asked casually, still looking into the distance.
“……”
“…You can tell me.”
I figured he probably knew about the uproar among the girls earlier in the day. But on second thought, his tone suggested he didn’t. Or maybe he did know and was pretending not to.
I had no idea.
I felt like I might be able to ask him something that I normally couldn’t. I hesitated, then dove in.
“Actually…there’s something I’ve been wanting to ask you for a long time.”
“What is it?” he asked, turning toward me.
“You see…”
I couldn’t say it. He very kindly waited as I stared at the ground and stalled.
“It’s… Um…”
I pulled myself together and looked up at him.
“I… Oh!”
“Suzu!!”
Just then, Kamishin walked up to us, his canoe over his shoulder.
“You going home now? I just finished practice. Man, I’m beat.”
“……”
I was too dazed to react.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, trying to read the situation.
I forced my face into a tense smile so he wouldn’t guess what was going on.
“Oh, um, Kamishin, your away game—how was it?” I stuttered. That got him going.
“I’m back from the race! And listen to this. I got myself all worked up and took an overnight bus to strut my stuff for the coach at the school I wanna go to, but my time was absolute garbage. Total fail,” he said merrily, accompanying his story with overly dramatic gestures and comical poses.
“Oh yeah, look at this!” he went on, pulling a phone in a waterproof case out of his wetsuit and bringing up a photo. It showed a group of high school kids from all over Japan between two tall buildings with some college students. Kamishin was striking a pose in the center of the first row.
“Some of these kids didn’t even qualify for the Inter-High Championships like I did, and here I bombed. I felt so bad.”
I stared at him, mouth slightly agape.
“You made the championships?”
“Heh-heh, yep,” he gloated, scratching his cheek.
Despite the casual way he mentioned it, making it to Inter-High is really impressive. You have to be crazy athletic to single-handedly start up a canoe club one year and make it to the national championships the next.
“Seriously?” I said with the biggest grin I could muster. “That’s incredible!! You’re awesome!! I’m rooting for you!”
“…Really?” he asked.
“Really!!”
Kamishin seemed to latch onto the phrase “rooting for you.” He gazed at me with a serious expression, then turned theatrically to Shinobu.
“So, Shinobu,” he said.
“Yeah?”
“Suzu said she’s rooting for me. Does that mean…”
“Hmm?”
He placed his hand on his hip with a gentlemanly flourish.
“…maybe she likes me a little?”
My grin vanished. He registered my blank face with a start.
“…Oh, no? …Maybe not, then,” he said very quietly.
Shinobu folded his arms in exasperation. “Go put that thing down already,” he said.
“I was just kidding! Anyway, Suzu, thanks for the support!”
“You’re welcome.”
“Hurry up,” Shinobu said.
“Yeah, yeah!”
Kamishin adjusted the canoe on his back and walked barefoot toward the boathouse. Shinobu and I were alone again.
“………”
But despite the perfect opportunity, I couldn’t get the words out. Kamishin had ruined my timing. Some sort of balance had crumbled. It wasn’t Kamishin’s fault; it was my own fault for not being able to take the necessary step. I’d given up on lots of other things for the very same reason: because I couldn’t get the timing right. Now I was about to give up again. All I could do was stand rooted to the ground watching the sun set over the river.
After a long silence, Shinobu said, “…So, what were you going to say earlier?”
“…Never mind.”
“You’re not pushing yourself too hard?”
“Nope.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
I closed my eyes.
I saw Shinobu’s young face peering into my own young face. I had to root out my feelings from back then. I had to squelch the feelings I’d never admitted.
I opened my eyes.
“…Shinobu, you don’t have to worry about me anymore.”
“Huh?”
I spun on my heel and started walking.
“Suzu!” he called.
I didn’t stop. I was feeling more and more pathetic.
“…What am I even trying to do?” I asked myself as I walked away.
Then I started running. My feelings had nowhere to go. I felt like they were going to split me open.
I ran as fast as I could. As I ran, I took out my phone and typed a message to Ruka.
Hi, Ruka, not sure I can be much help, but feel free to ask me anything. I’m here for you.
I sent it.
I stopped to catch my breath, staring at the screen. An answer came right away.
Thanks, Suzu!
Wow, I wasn’t expecting that haha. I’ll do my best. Thanks for the encouragement!
The cheerful message seemed very Ruka-like. I wondered if “I’m here for you” came across as overly friendly, since we weren’t that close. I felt bad for catching her off guard.
My chest felt tight.
As soon as I read the message, tears spilled from my eyes and plopped onto the ground. I wiped them away with the back of my hand. But they just kept coming. My eyes were like leaky faucets I couldn’t turn off.
I hugged my phone to my chest and kept on crying.