Chapter 1: Oracle
THE first thing he became aware of was a nauseating sense of unease, coupled with a crippling sense of despair.
The entire area was shrouded in darkness, leaving him unable to see his own body, let alone which direction he was going. The only light in this dark world was a tiny pinprick exactly at eye level.
Goosebumps rose on his flesh at the impossible—no, improbable—sight.
How…?
Trembling, he raised his hand. Resisting the urge to turn around, he took a half-step into the darkness. As soon as he did, the tiny prick of light swelled to the size of his pinky, as if drawing nearer, and engulfed him in a blindingly bright light.
His pulse quickened and his heart raced. The darkness was all he could see; he couldn’t hear his own ragged breathing, never mind his footsteps. In this world where he’d lost his hearing, he realized that he’d unconsciously covered his face.
In this world with no sense of distance, the light flicked back and forth menacingly, like a snake’s tongue.
I have to put it out…
Gritting his teeth, he stepped completely into the darkness. As if in response, the distant light slowly grew a little larger. This time, to a size larger than his thumb. He wondered how big it really was.
I have to put it out. Fast.
Because it wasn’t supposed to exist. Not in a place like this, or maybe simply because he himself didn’t need it?
Trying to drag along the dual weight of his malice and impatience, he continued to walk into the depths of darkness. With each step, his feelings of grief multiplied, and his feet felt heavier, like he was hauling a lead weight. As he got closer, bit by bit, the light became larger.
I believed that here, of all places, there would be no light…
There was never any light in his dreams, as he loved the darkness. There was supposed to be nothing here, save for the empty darkness. It was the only place he could breathe freely.
Because for him, the light was something that shouldn’t exist.
Each time the flame flickered, his chest tightened. He hadn’t even realized it, as, for a moment, he had been able to forget the pain. But it came back again and again.
Ahh, why is there light here?
He reached out his hands, imploring the light to disappear. It seemed so close, the way it bathed him in its obnoxious glow. And yet, no matter how far he walked, he could not reach it.
Ahh, why is this happening? I believed that, here at least, I could rest…
He kept walking, hoping to douse the light. He walked down that never-ending tunnel of darkness, not stopping his gait until he reached his goal…
✦ ✦ ✦
YURA Sugano awoke with a shout.
Her head popped up off the cold desk.
“Sugano, if you have no intention of taking my class seriously, then get out!”
Still not fully awake, she emitted a tired groan, before realizing where she was. She leapt up in a panic, as if yanked by a string, and looked around, causing her classroom to erupt in raucous laughter.
It was 2:15 PM. Sixth period. Math class.
Her desk was still covered with all her books for fifth period.
“I-I’m so sorry…”
Still in a sleepy daze, Yura was unable to figure out what else to say, flailing about and scooping the open textbooks toward her.
Naturally, the metal pencil case situated at the corner of her desk was knocked to the floor by the dictionary it was leaning against. It hit the ground with a reverberating clang. This, in turn, elicited even more laughter.
Uggggghhhh!
Fighting back the tears over how pathetic she must look, Yura squatted and frantically scooped up her scattered pens and pencils while her teacher heaved a loud sigh.
She couldn’t resist casting a longing glance toward the trees bursting with fresh May leaves lining the streets visible from the second-story window. Despite the calm, cheerful weather, Yura felt a chill and she struggled to keep herself from bursting into tears.
Yura slinked back up into her seat the second she collected her things. Her teacher moved away and started to write on the board. Breathing a sigh of relief at finally putting an end to the commotion, Yura realized her fingers were trembling.
Ahh, why… Why am I the only one who can’t do anything right?
She could feel her classmates’ amused glances. Yura closed her eyes for a moment, trying to calm down.
It’s all right. It’s the same as always. It’s fine. It’s all right. I mean, I should be used to this by now, right?
She was used to their scornful laughter by now. She’d always been aware of it, just as one was aware of the sounds of nature or car engines when walking down the street. She was used to their words creeping into her ears, no matter how she tried to ignore them. She was used to it.
As the tears began to well up, Yura dabbed quickly at the corners of her eyes and gazed down at her textbook. She pretended to focus on the lecture. The muscles in the back of her neck seemed to stiffen. Her pulse thundered erratically, like she’d just finished running a mile. Bathump. Bathump.
What was that, anyway…?
That tiny, distant, swaying, solitary light…
In that world completely enveloped in darkness. That heart-wrenching feeling of despair that’d overcome her like a tidal wave.
And then, there was that voice…
That voice that resonated in her head and her heart. A voice she had never heard before. An anguished voice.
Why was she so anxious…? Maybe because it’d been such a scary dream? Or maybe because of what had just happened?
Placing her hands on her temples, she took a deep breath.
For better or worse, she’d almost forgotten the dream in all the chaos.
The hands on the clock hanging over the blackboard read just past 2:30.
There were ten minutes of class left. When her eyes met the teacher’s at the lectern, Yura quickly looked away in a panic.
Trying to mentally shift gears, she struggled to grapple with the problem literally right in front of her.
Her mouth was totally dry.
She held her breath, trying to keep down the dry cough. These last few minutes of class were excruciating.