“…you can handle the rest, can’t you?”
“Yes. Leave it to me.”
I ended the call and rubbed my eyes, but the tears still wouldn’t stop. Grief and joy mixed and alternated between one another as the tears flowed without end. I had no idea what was going on anymore. I quietly examined the room.
My room.
Not my dorm room at Jaunt in America—my bedroom in Japan.
I restrained my racing heart and looked at the clock on my desk. I couldn’t believe it, so I turned on the TV to find a news broadcast. My face reflected in the dark TV screen felt off to me. I looked for a mirror and saw myself looking a little younger. And the date shown on the TV news was—I’d never forget it—the date of that night when I first received a call from “me.” The night before I would say the words that drove Yukari to her decision.
Of course, if I didn’t change the past from this date, it would be impossible to save Yukari. That was why I’d erased all other possibilities—all other worlds.
Ideally, rather than return to the past, I would have liked to switch places with a “me” in a world in which Yukari was already saved, but I guess that was asking for too much (and frankly, I couldn’t even imagine it), but that’s neither here nor there.
“I’m back…”
I bet the phone call I got then was from a future me. At the time, this ability was new to me. I had no knowledge or experience and didn’t understand anything. However, that wasn’t me anymore. Now I shared the knowledge and experience of all the worlds.
I can do it now.
It was too much for me to handle. I dove into my bed and buried my face in my pillow. I rubbed my face on the tear-stained pillow and screamed into it.
In this world, Yukari is still alive.
And I can save her.
This time, I would not mess up.
✦ ✦ ✦
The next morning, I left early to meet Yukari at her house. Seeing her for the first time in a while, a long while, a myriad of worlds’ worth of a while, I uncontrollably held her tight. I couldn’t stop myself.
Then we went to school together. I faced Alice (and honestly, seeing her shook me, for now I had the memory of hating her, the memory of loving her, the memory of supporting her, of killing her, everything; whether or not it felt real now, there was no way I could be calm) and I told her outright that I would never let Yukari go.
For Yukari’s sake? To protect her? Those words that had once reverberated with me now rang so hollow.
I didn’t listen to anything Alice said. I got promoted from a nobody to a super-nobody—which I’m not sure makes sense as a word—and I didn’t care, not at all. I denounced Jaunt as a terrorist training organization and treated Alice as a pitiful little girl. I refused to leave Yukari’s side. I growled at interlopers like an animal and even drove teachers away. It seemed that after experiencing so many worlds, I’d developed a certain presence. All day I showed everyone what a beast I could be and colossally wrecked the cool-as-a-cucumber image of Hatou Manabu that had existed until then. I didn’t care about any of that anyway—not with Yukari finally here next to me. Because now I could hold her.
And this time, I would protect Yukari without fail.
✦ ✦ ✦
Alice stayed in our class to the end of the third and final term, at which point she returned to Jaunt in low spirits. Yukari became a third-year, staying at the same school—with me. I’d chased away Alice, gotten rid of Jaunt’s interference, and protected Yukari.
✦ ✦ ✦
It wasn’t even half a year later that someone abducted Yukari.
By the time I found her, her body had already gone cold.