“Hail fellow, well met!”
The two men waiting outside the café doors were startled by the boisterous voice that greeted them.
“Uh…?”
“A centaur in a maid outfit—or, wait, not quite…?”
It made sense that they were confused. Centorea stood at the door in an altered costume, with a silver cuirass strapped across her chest and a fake sword slung at her side. Under close scrutiny, it was obvious the armor was also fake, but it was well made enough to make the right initial impression. As the customers gaped at her, she announced, “I am Centorea, and while I normally serve as a knight, today I am sworn to this maid café! For reasons.”
“So you’re, like, a female knight? A…knight-maid?”
“Wow, her acting’s on point.”
“I am not an actor!” she insisted. She’d been having this conversation since the start of the shift. The armor came courtesy of Salmon and Dubtwo, who’d somehow found a set at short notice. “A chivalric heart beats strong inside me, and when I return from this post to Milord’s side, the hardships endured here will have strengthened it further.” She gazed hard at the customers.
“O-oh,” one of them stammered.
“Her sense of duty is so inspiring!” cheered the other.
“Come, let me serve you! Let us proceed to your assigned seating.” With a dramatic sweep of her arm, she invited them inside. She was every bit the accommodating maid but with her own special twist.
From the corner, Kimihito watched Centorea work. Salmon and Dubtwo had taken the next table over. “That armor could be in a movie,” he whispered, trying to keep a low profile without knowing why.
“Thank you—but of course, it’s actually cardboard.”
“We got the pattern from a cosplay magazine, copied it at a larger size, and then sprayed it silver. Akihabara’s got everything.” According to Dubtwo, the spray paint used for plastic models could make anything look metal with just one coat, and dried fast.
“It’s made really well,” Kimihito said.
“There’s a trick to it—”
“—We got a lot of practice at work!”
They laughed in unison. What on Earth did Smith have her agents doing?
The sword itself was a dull metal display sword she carried daily to “protect” Kimihito. Somehow, it had finally come in handy.
“Thanks to your help, Cerea seems like she’s actually having fun,” he said.
“We barely did anything.”
“Yeah, the whole maid-knight idea was yours. Don’t sell yourself short.”
“Can I really take credit for that?” He wore a pained smile. “That’s just how she acts all the time.” His thinking had been: if she couldn’t play the role of a traditional maid, there must be another type of maid she could be instead. Thanks to Akihabara’s unusual tastes, he’d found the perfect option. After all, lots of maid cafés had secondary themes they used to stand out, and there would always be customers who liked a change from the norm. The break room here had tons of doujin about female knight characters.
“—should our guests prefer, we also have this option—”
Of course, most of those doujin followed a formula, one he didn’t think would go down well with Centorea: the knight would be captured by enemies who did lewd and indecent things to her. They’d still been useful inspiration, especially since several of them featured the theme of a female knight doubling as a maid. He’d shown her an example of the trope to help her understand what he was suggesting. After looking at it, she agreed that since she acted as a knight in her daily life, it wouldn’t be too hard to be a knight-maid instead.
“—summoned me, traveler? Prithee, speak, and I shall take note of your order.” Centorea stopped at the table on the other side of Kimihito. As she went through the menu with them, her mannerisms were different from the standard maid, but they fit in just fine with the wild spirit of Akihabara.
When they pitched the concept to Ren, she agreed that allowing each maid some individuality could be a hook for some customers. Everyone was on board.
Salmon and Dubtwo watched Centorea and nodded.
“Now that’s what I call a female knight.”
“Stiff, awkward, and eager to serve? She’s the ideal!”
Kimihito wasn’t sure why that was ideal, but he breathed a sigh of relief.
“Two iced coffees? Very well. Please be patient.” She finished with the customers and made her way over to Kimihito, an uneasy look on her face. “Milord,” she said to him, “is this truly permissible? I feel as if I’m taking too high-handed a stance with the customers. It is completely unlike what Ren demonstrated to us.”
“Think of it like a concept café! She did give us the okay, remember?”
“’Tis true…” She didn’t relax at all.
Salmon and Dubtwo leaned in.
“Have you heard of the tsundere café? People come from all across the city just to get insulted by those cute girls! There’s a café for every taste.”
“Even if your speech is overbearing, Centorea-dono, it’s what suits you. People think you’re putting on a character.”
“It is not a character, though!” she shouted.
Kimihito smiled. “It’s fine. Just keep being yourself,” he said.
“Y-yes. You’ve been quite clear.” Centorea nodded and trotted off to the kitchen.
The customers watched her go with unwavering gazes. They didn’t just stare at her face but also her armor and her horse-like hind quarters.
“Centaurs are great, huh?”
“Here’s hoping someone opens a dedicated monster girl café.”
“I wanna see a bunch of them. A café for every type!”
“Yeah, monster girls are the best!”
Unsurprisingly, liminal girls were popular with this crowd. Through Smith, Kimihito had learned that there were a lot of people who wanted to host them, and as a host himself, he could understand the appeal.
“U-um, excuse me!” Suddenly Manako’s voice lifted above the rest. He looked up and saw her turning toward him with a teary eye. Salmon and Dubtwo readied themselves, leaning forward and preparing to leap to her aid. “There’s a problem!”
“What’s the matter?” Kimihito asked.
“People keep asking for pictures!” she said.
“Huh?” He surveyed the crowd and discovered many of them were watching her with phones at the ready.
“I…I’ve just never been asked for them before! Is it okay? Are there policies I need to follow?”
“It’s fine! Go get ’em, Manako!” Ren called from the kitchen with an encouraging gesture.
Manako continued to cry, but now it seemed to be from relief—maybe even joy. It was unlikely that anyone had ever asked to take a picture with her before.
Salmon and Dubtwo seemed moved, too.
“Here I thought they’d never see the charm of the cyclopean!” said Salmon.
“Her future’s so bright, we oughtta make her shades!” said Dubtwo.
Their own eyes filled with tears.
It was a mystery to Kimihito why they were so invested, but he couldn’t dwell on it, because Manako was shivering with anxiety. He had to intervene. “Hey, could I take the pictures?” he asked.
“Wh-what?! But you’re meant to be relaxing!” Manako said.
“It’s no trouble. Besides, I’m sure you’d like a familiar face there for your photo debut.”
“Th-thank you so much!” She was more obvious about it, but they were both relieved. He’d felt weird sitting around with nothing to do. It would be a genuine pleasure to help Manako navigate her newfound popularity.
“We can’t just sit and watch,” said Salmon, “we gotta get in line, too.”
“Yeah,” said Dubtwo, “it’s not like we’ve ever had the chance to be in a photo with her! This is an incredible opportunity for her two biggest fans.”
They clenched their fists passionately and rose to their feet.
“Aren’t you her coworkers?” Kimihito asked.
“It’s Maid Manako, though! That’s an SSR Manako variant!”
“Yeah! Plus, she’s normally with Zombina-san and Doppel-san! They’re so scar—so close to her that they’d get in the way if we tried!”
Any excuse to get that photo, huh?
Kimihito readied an instant camera as fast as he could. It was a simple point-and-shoot, no settings to mess with, so he felt up to the task.
As she settled into position, Manako gave him a shy smile. “Thank you very much.”
If that’s how she smiles for this, she’ll hit the top of the popularity rankings in no time, thought Kimihito as he took the first shot.