Chapter 6

From that point on, we never saw Fuyutsuki at college again. I found out that she always sang to the children at the hospital at around two PM. The walls, hallways, and staff uniforms of the hospital were all white, and everything smelled like disinfectant. In contrast, the Kids’ Room was decorated in pastel colors, which created a surreal atmosphere that made it feel worlds away from the rest of the hospital. Through the glass, I watched Fuyutsuki singing happily as she played the piano. Not even the sight of the children playing and singing brought me any comfort. Watching Fuyutsuki only filled me with a sense of unease. She was always wearing fluffy pajamas, which suggested she was a patient there. I couldn’t bring myself to talk to her. Had she really forgotten everything? It was so hard to accept. Couldn’t this all be a joke? A lie? An act? I couldn’t let go of that possibility. I was grasping at straws. Which was why I eventually decided to speak to her. “Hey,” I said—but she completely ignored me. It was as though she hadn’t heard me at all. She didn’t even notice I was there. It hurt so bad. It was so painful. I wished I was dead. I was filled with regret. I felt more and more like I wanted to die. At the same time, though, I felt like I wanted to be near Fuyutsuki. I’m such a weirdo, I thought, chiding myself. I couldn’t believe someone like me, who’d never had any attachments, was clinging on so tightly to Fuyutsuki. It happened during lunch break. I’d picked the minced meat cutlet set meal, Narumi had chosen a large serving of katsu curry, and Hayase had ordered tempura soba. It was the busiest time of the day for the cafeteria, and we were holding our trays, looking for an empty table in the crowded room. We finally found seats, but as soon as I took a bite of my meal, I regretted ordering so much food. I hadn’t worked up that much of an appetite. “Hey, look at this,” Hayase said, loud enough to be heard over the hubbub of the cafeteria. She showed us her phone screen. It read “Student Volunteer Wanted.” “You’re not doing more volunteer work, are you?” asked Narumi, stuffing his mouth with curry. He made it sound as if Hayase was addicted to volunteering. “Read the whole thing,” she said. “It’s for that hospital?” “Yeah! They’re asking for somebody to help entertain the children in the Kids’ Room. They’d have to read books and do picture-story shows.” I felt like a ray of hope had just shone through the clouds. This could be my chance to get close to Fuyutsuki. As that thought crossed my mind, I caught a whiff of the sauce covering my minced meat cutlet and suddenly felt hungry. “Why don’t we go for it?” “We might get to talk to Koharu.” “But you know,” Narumi said, still shoveling food into his mouth, “if we go in wid ulcheeria mochives…” “Swallow your food before you talk.” Narumi swallowed hard, then started his sentence again. “If we go in with ulterior motives, we won’t get past the interview.” He made a good point. “If I’m going to do this, I intend to give it my all, regardless of Koharu,” Hayase declared earnestly. Gone was the sensitive and frail panda-like version of Hayase I’d seen the other day. She gazed at me with a dignified look on her face. “Let’s just apply. I mean, we already found Koharu.” I found myself responding with a slightly excited “Yeah.” I couldn’t stop these feelings welling up inside me. No matter how much we discussed it, we had no other options. The answer was obvious. If I could be near Fuyutsuki, that was all that mattered. That thought rose up from deep inside my chest, sending my brain into a stupor. The back of my nose felt hot. I could tell how excited I was. The next day, Hayase, Narumi, and I decided to apply for the student volunteer position at the hospital. All three of us passed the interview without any trouble. Our university’s reputation, not to mention the help we received from volunteering fanatic Hayase, played a big part in that. However, passing the interview didn’t mean we could just start the next day. There were lots of clerical tasks we had to complete, such as filling out forms, getting antibody tests done, and buying volunteer insurance. We also had to attend an orientation session where they taught us about volunteering. The hospital instructed us on how to avoid upsetting the children—we weren’t allowed to discuss their illnesses, for example—and taught us the proper way to wash our hands to prevent the spread of infection. One thing a nurse told us during the orientation really struck a chord with me. “This is a tough job, but please keep at it.” That was when I realized this volunteering gig wasn’t going to be a cakewalk. On our first day as volunteers, the three of us were joined by two older women who seemed to live nearby. There were thirteen kids in total. Some had arm injuries, others had leg casts, and a few wore knitted hats. They ranged in age from about five to nine years old. According to one of the nurses, children who stay long-term in the hospital’s pediatric ward often have serious illnesses. We were clearly instructed not to mention their ailments, as the time we spent with them was meant to help the kids forget the hardships of their hospital stay—even if only for a little while. The Kids’ Room was filled with excited squeals. That day, we were all doing origami. “Roar!” Or at least, we were supposed to be doing origami. Instead, Narumi was surrounded by a group of boys who were climbing on his back and kicking him. “Could you pass me that origami book?” Hayase, meanwhile, was surrounded by girls. She could have just made simple things like planes or cranes, but instead, she was staring at the book and trying to fold things like roses and lilies that were beyond her skill level. At the hospital, the children’s playtime was called Kids’ Time. These sessions were held on a daily basis to make sure they never got bored in the hospital. Before we started, the nurse in charge had introduced me to Fuyutsuki. “She plays the piano during Kids’ Time, but she also happens to be one of our patients.” The moment the nurse said Fuyutsuki was a patient, my entire body tensed up. I had suspected as much, but hearing it said so plainly made me feel like a weight had settled on my chest. Fuyutsuki seemed a little taken aback when the nurse told her that some more student volunteers would be joining. “Nice to meet you,” I said to her. “Nice to meet you, too,” she responded quietly. Fuyutsuki pursed her lips tightly. It was as if the lively, cheerful Fuyutsuki I’d met at college had never existed at all. “Ooh, I wonder if I can make one, too.” Surrounded by a group of children, Fuyutsuki made origami guided by touch. The kids stuck by her side, seemingly drawn to her gentle voice. She was folding paper airplanes. They were simple enough to make, even for someone who couldn’t see. As soon as she finished one airplane, she’d hand it to a child—but they’d just throw it through the air and demand another, making it hard for her to keep up. It looked like she was about to run out of paper, so I silently placed more next to her. I figured she probably wouldn’t notice with her lack of sight. I was wrong. “…Thank you,” she said. Maybe she’d been counting the sheets with her fingertips. If she could count coins just by touching them, she could probably count sheets of origami paper the same way. Her response was so unexpected that it filled me with joy. I was so elated I couldn’t stop myself from talking to her. “Want me to help with the paper airplanes? I bet you’re struggling to keep up.” But just then… “Kancho!” came a voice from behind me as I felt an electric shock shoot all the way from my bottom up into my brain. “Owwwwwwww!” I couldn’t help but scream. I turned around to see a little boy with a shaved head grinning mischievously. He’d poked me in the butt. “…You can’t do that. It really hurts… It’s not allowed.” “You were staring at that girl, weren’t you? Ew, gross!” said the boy. “I—I was not,” I protested. “Liar! I know! You were looking at her boobs, weren’t you?” I glanced at Fuyutsuki. Her face was bright red, and she was covering her chest. “I wasn’t. Of course I wasn’t. I’d never do that!” “Liar, liar, pants on fire!” “You can’t make fun of grown-ups like that,” I scolded him, but the boy just seemed to find that funny, too. “Boobies! Boobies! Boobies!” he yelled, running around the room. “Hey! Stop running—it’s dangerous!” I scolded him. But all the other children had started to giggle, which only encouraged him to continue his chant. Narumi blocked the boy’s path and wrapped his arms around him. “Gotcha.” “Let go of me, old man. I’m boiling!” He struggled to break free from Narumi’s arms. Meanwhile, Narumi seemed to be in shock, unable to believe the kid thought he looked old. He muttered “Old man” under his breath, followed by something short and unintelligible, before tensing up. “If you start running again, Muscly Old Man’s gonna catch ya,” he warned the boy. “Fine,” the kid said meekly. “Why am I calling myself Muscly Old Man?” asked Narumi. “I reckon you’d be popular posting videos online with that name,” I joked. “‘Today, we’re gonna do two hundred push-ups. It’s time to push yourself with Muscly Old Man.’ Somethin’ like that?” “Nah, that sounds lame.” “Whaaat? Hmm, seems like my joke fell flat.” “Like a lead balloon.” “Come to think of it, what does Muscly Old Man even mean?” “Hey, you two! Get back to folding origami,” Hayase scolded us. “Okay!” Narumi and I replied in unison. One of the older ladies who’d been listening in on our conversation smiled. “You two sound like a comedy duo.” That was the moment. Fuyutsuki burst out laughing. Her whole body was shaking with laughter. It had been so long since I’d seen her laugh that seeing her like that triggered a wave of nostalgia. I thought back to all the happy times we’d had together on the terrace; she looked just like the Fuyutsuki I’d known back then. My vision began to blur as tears welled up in my eyes. After playing with the children for about two hours, we sent them back to their hospital rooms. As we were cleaning up the now-empty Kids’ Room, I overheard the volunteer staff talking to one another. “Come to think of it, Sumire wasn’t here today, was she?” “I heard she’s started her treatment.” “Oh, that’s going to be so tough on her.” Their conversation made my heart ache. Two weeks had gone by since I’d started volunteering. Every time I tried to talk to Fuyutsuki, our conversations never went anywhere. In fact, it felt like she was avoiding me. June had come to a close, and the rainy season had finished earlier than it usually did. Summer was just around the corner. I was doing Kids’ Time by myself that day. While I was tidying up, Fuyutsuki called out to me. “Sorano, are you there?” My heart nearly jumped out of my chest. It was so unexpected that my pulse started to race, but at the same time, the fact that she’d called me by my last name instead of Kakeru filled me with despair. I tried to respond as calmly as possible. “Hmm? I’m here.” “Is everything okay with college, Sorano?” she asked me. “Okay in what way?” “I mean, are you doing okay attendance-wise?” “Oh, right. Don’t worry about that. Hayase’s covering for me.” “I am pretty worried about you, you know?” said Fuyutsuki, her expression stern. It was a look I’d never really seen her make before. “What about you, Fuyutsuki? Are you doing okay?” “What do you mean?” “I mean, are you coping okay with college?” “College?” She looked puzzled. Then she lowered her voice. “I don’t go to college.” The blood drained from my face; that wasn’t the response I’d been hoping for. My whole world turned dark. Had Fuyutsuki…lost all her memories from that time in her life? Hadn’t she gotten her high school equivalency diploma and worked hard to earn a place at college? How had everything become so detached from reality? “Don’t change the subject. We’re talking about your college studies right now, Sorano.” I was exhausted. My heart couldn’t take any more. “Volunteering is a wonderful thing, but I don’t think you should neglect your main responsibilities.” I didn’t want to think about it. “……” “……” We were quiet for a moment. Then her voice broke through the silence. “Sorano?” “Yeah?” “I thought you had gone somewhere.” “…I guess I went into my shell.” I gave her my usual response. I used to love it when Fuyutsuki would call me a meanie, pouting and feigning annoyance. Those everyday interactions we’d had were so precious to me. This time, however, things were different. “Stop joking around.” There was a sharpness to her voice. “Are you even listening?” she asked grumpily, pouring salt on the wound. I didn’t want to think. I wouldn’t think about it. Not anymore. “I’m doing perfectly fine at college,” I insisted, my voice growing louder. I could tell the other volunteers were beginning to stare. But… Even so… It was too much for me. She’d forgotten everyone. She’d even forgotten what she’d worked so hard to obtain. What was I supposed to say to her? “Hey, what’s wrong?” asked Fuyutsuki, sounding uneasy. She slowly reached out, feeling the space around her, and touched my shoulder. In the middle of my vision turning white, she’d touched me. And yet I just brushed off Fuyutsuki’s fretful hand. “It’s—” I was just about to shout “It’s nothing!” when Fuyutsuki spoke up. “Why don’t we talk outside, okay?” She looked troubled, but she forced a smile anyway. As I glanced around, I noticed that everyone was staring at me. I’d clearly seemed unstable. “Sorry,” I said, but I wasn’t sure what I was apologizing for. Still, I was sorry. We left the Kids’ Room and headed up to the rooftop garden. Fuyutsuki led me there, holding on to my arm and the railing. It had been so long since she’d touched me, and her hands felt so much colder than they had before. As soon as we stepped out into the garden, I could almost feel myself choking from the mugginess of early summer. Fuyutsuki walked along the promenade, running her hand along its railing. At the end of the path was a bench, and we sat down on it. After taking a deep breath, Fuyutsuki began. “Let’s go over everything.” “Go over what?” “I used to attend the same college as you and the others, right?” “Yeah. You did.” “So we know each other from there, but it seems like I’ve suddenly lost my memories.” “Right.” Fuyutsuki looked straight at me—or rather, toward the sound of my voice. “To tell you the truth, I’m pretty shaken up. I don’t know what to do,” I told her. “What do you want me to do?” Fuyutsuki countered. “Do you want me to remember you?” “…Well…” “Simply put, that would be a nuisance for me.” “A nuisance?” Her unexpected response had me confused. What had she meant by that? Would remembering her past inconvenience her? Did the things that were so dear to me mean nothing to her? My heart hurt. It was beating so hard it felt as though it might burst. The pounding echoed in my ears, and my head was starting to ache. The cicadas in the garden started chirping even louder, making me feel overwhelmed. What does she mean? What’s she talking about? My thoughts were racing. Fuyutsuki smiled brightly and spoke in a tranquil tone of voice. “I only have about six months left to live.” She kept going. “The cancer has spread to my liver, so I’m going to die soon.” “I’m going to die.” Fuyutsuki had said those words so casually. “Since I know I’m going to die soon, remembering things like that would just cause me more pain, don’t you think? Besides, Sorano, you’re better off not caring about me, seeing as I don’t have long to live. It would be a waste of your time.” It was so sad, yet she’d said that last line so straightforwardly. The corners of my eyes grew hot, and my vision went blurry. Warm tears started to flow down my cheeks. “Oh.” My tears wouldn’t stop. “I see…” I kept trying to wipe them away, but it was futile. “Sorry,” I told her. “I’m sorry for getting myself involved in this weird way.” “…? Are you okay?” I didn’t want Fuyutsuki to realize I was crying. I tried my hardest to stifle my sobs. “Are you really going to die?” “Yeah. Somehow, I just know I am.” She was accepting that fact so easily. “This is the third time, after all,” she added with a smile. Had she made peace with what was going to happen? Or just resigned herself to her fate? “I started chemo last week, and honestly, I’m not doing well. In about two weeks, I won’t even be able to leave the hospital room anymore. “So please, just forget about me. “Please.” She had this great big smile on her face as she spoke. “Okay.” All right. I see. I guess this is just the way it is. My heart had broken. I heard it snap deep inside me. Or at least, it felt like I did. I could tell my voice was shaking. “I’m sorry for being so stubborn,” I said. I didn’t really understand what I’d done wrong, but I apologized regardless. Tears kept streaming down my face. It felt like I was trying to force out all the feelings I’d had for Fuyutsuki. They just kept pouring out. I didn’t have a handkerchief, so I had to wipe my tears away with my palms. My face was a total mess, and I didn’t have a clue what I was supposed to do. Fuyutsuki left me there and started making her way back to her room, running her hand along the railing. My face was stained with tears, so I relaxed on the bench in the rooftop garden and tried to calm down. “Are you a friend of Fuyutsuki’s from school?” asked a middle-aged doctor in a white coat. Although he seemed quite young, the doctor had noticeable dark circles underneath his eyes, and he looked worn out. He must have noticed the distrustful look in my eyes, because he held up his hands to reassure me. “I’m Fuyutsuki’s attending physician,” he explained. Once he’d told me who he was, I gave him a small nod. To my surprise, the doctor lit a cigarette. I was taken aback. Was he actually going to smoke in a communal area like this? “Just so you know, this is the smoking area,” he told me. “You shouldn’t really be here.” “Smoking area or not, haven’t you ever heard of secondhand smoke? It’s bad for people’s health.” My mind may have been consumed by thoughts of Fuyutsuki, but I still regretted snapping at the doctor like that. “I’d appreciate it if you held your breath for a little while, then,” he said with a smirk. “I’m sorry for being rude. But if you’re Fuyutsuki’s attending physician, you must be a cancer doctor. I thought tobacco increased your risk of getting lung cancer.” “I get a checkup every month, so don’t worry about me. As long as it gets detected early, I’ll be able to cure it myself.” The doctor casually swayed his cigarette around. I got the impression he was an easy person to talk to. “Can I ask you something?” “Hmm? Is it about Fuyutsuki’s memories?” He’d known exactly what I was going to ask about. “Yes. Is it possible for someone to lose them?” He let out a puff of purple smoke toward the sky. “If a tumor develops in the area of the brain that deals with memory, it’s not entirely impossible. That said, in Fuyutsuki’s case, her cancer has spread to her liver, so normally, memory loss wouldn’t occur.” “Then why…?” “It’s rare, but your memories can become muddled when you start chemotherapy. You struggle to remember the events of the previous day, and you feel dazed. It’s called chemo brain. Things like that can happen when a person takes strong medication.” “So will she…?” “However, the symptoms Fuyutsuki is experiencing don’t align with chemo brain.” “What do you mean?” “I don’t think it’s an illness or medication that’s causing her to forget things. It’s something psychological. You could even say it’s almost like she’s blocked her own memories.” “What…?” “If you stimulate her memory, something might happen… Do you want to give it a try?” “I can’t do that. She just turned me down.” The doctor sighed, letting out smoke at the same time. “Well, you might still change your mind. For now, shrinking her cancer is the priority.” “Could you tell me something?” “What is it?” “Will Fuyutsuki’s cancer be cured?” The doctor put out his cigarette and looked at me. “Well, her chances stand at about five percent.” “A five percent chance of dying?” “A five percent chance of surviving until the end of the year. Her five-year survival rate is pretty dismal.” The doctor spoke in detail about her cancer, but none of it registered with me. Fuyutsuki had a 5 percent chance of surviving the year. She wasn’t going to last five years. Her light could go out at any time. That’s why she’d asked me to forget her. My chest tightened painfully. As the doctor was leaving, he gave me a determined look. “I’ll cure it, though.” Three days had gone by since my encounter with the doctor. I couldn’t just quit volunteering, though, so Hayase went in my place. Going to see Fuyutsuki was painful. Even just looking at her was painful. Fourth period had just finished, and I was sitting in the sun in our usual spot on the terrace. The sun was beaming down, and I could feel it burning my skin. As I sank deeper into my daze, my skin continued to burn. I could see thunderclouds in the distance, and I imagined heavy rain falling beneath them. Picturing the juxtaposition of the clear skies with the torrential rain got me in a strangely philosophical mood—probably because I’d just had my Philosophy I lecture. Suddenly, a voice interrupted my contemplation. “Are you okay?” A thin, bearded guy had approached me. It was the president of the fireworks club we’d met way back when. “I’m hanging in there,” I replied. “That’s pretty vague. It’s me, Kotomugi.” Kotomugi was dressed in a T-shirt, shorts, and beach sandals, and he was carrying a bucket and a fishing rod. It seemed like he was on his way to go fishing. Sometimes I wondered whether our college gave its students too much freedom. “Where’s the blind girl?” he asked. This mention of Fuyutsuki almost made me tear up. Please, just drop it. “She’s in the hospital. Her health’s taken a turn for the worse.” “Aw, no way. If she’s your girlfriend, you should stick by her side.” “She’s not my girlfriend.” “So you weren’t dating?” “She rejected me.” Stop. I’ll end up crying if you don’t. “When the going gets tough, fireworks can help.” Kotomugi’s blasé tone annoyed me. I was the one who was down in the dumps, and yet there he was, rambling on about fireworks. I could feel anger bubbling up inside me. “The fireworks competition starts the week after next,” he said. “Actually, we’ve got a bit of a problem on our hands.” Kotomugi looked troubled. Without meaning to, I let out a curt response. “Something happen?” “You know how the fireworks got canceled at the student festival? It’s caused a bit of a problem.” Despite him saying that, Kotomugi didn’t seem particularly agitated. I didn’t respond, but he continued prattling on regardless. “It’s the cancellation costs for the fireworks. This pyrotechnician I know wants to buy all the fireworks we made, but the festival committee says they can reuse them for another event, so they only want to pay for the setup costs. Both sides are in a deadlock, and I’m stuck in the middle. I wish they’d put themselves in my shoes,” he said, but I was completely uninterested in his meaningless chatter. “I’m surprised the university lets you set off fireworks at all.” I responded to his pointless chatter with a similarly pointless comment. However, Kotomugi seemed pleased that I’d asked him this, and he proudly began to explain the necessary procedures and applications required for launching fireworks. Oops, I thought, regretting saying anything. I got him going now. I wasn’t giving him my full attention, but from what I gathered, you had to file a notice with the prefectural government and undergo a fire safety inspection before you could set off fireworks. It didn’t sound like it was as easy as I’d initially assumed. “But there is a loophole,” Kotomugi continued, looking pleased. “If you have, say, fifty size-two shells, fifteen size-three shells, ten size-four shells, with waterfall-style and set-piece fireworks in between—creating a three-minute program of seventy-five fireworks in total—you can do it without any paperwork.” “Oh wow, I didn’t know that,” I said, feigning interest. As monotonous as my reply sounded, Kotomugi seemed pleased that I’d said anything at all. For some reason, he’d taken a liking to me. “I’m about to go fishing. Wanna come?” he asked with a guileless look in his eyes. It was hard to deal with someone like him when I felt so down. “You can catch small horse mackerel at this time of year, and the ladies at the cafeteria will fry them up for you!” He wouldn’t stop talking. I was obviously uninterested—giving responses like “Oh” and “Right”—yet he kept on chatting to me. Please, give me a break. But just as those words were about to leave my mouth, Kotomugi started to look for something. “Oh, I almost forgot.” He shoved his hands into his pants pockets, muttering, “Is that it?” and “Where is it?” then searched his fishing gear bag and his backpack. “Well, I guess I should head back and start that report,” I said. I found myself suddenly irritated, and I started to rise to my feet—but at that moment, he found what he’d been looking for. “Here it is! Found it! Doesn’t this belong to your girlfriend?” he asked, pulling something out of the bag slung over his shoulder. I recognized it immediately. My eyes went so wide that even I noticed it happening. My heart had been almost lifeless just moments ago, yet it had begun pounding so hard it hurt. It was a yellow bookmark with bumps on it—the one I thought we’d lost. “It’s something I’d really like you to read, Kakeru.” Fuyutsuki’s face as she said that drifted through my mind. “Where…did you get this?” My hands trembling, I reached out for the bookmark. “It was on the ground outside the prefab building for our club. Since it’s in braille, I figured it might be hers. I was going to give it to your girlfriend if I saw her, but since she’s in the hospital, I’ll give it to you instead.” How could I express my gratitude for this miracle? Before I knew it, I was hugging Kotomugi. “Thank you so much! I can’t thank you enough!” “Whoa! Hey, you’re squishing me!” I took the bookmark from him and examined it closely. It really was Fuyutsuki’s bookmark. The corners were bent, the edges were tattered, and it was dirty in places. But it had come back. Fuyutsuki’s bookmark had made its way back to me. I was on the verge of tears. As I ran my fingers over it, deep affection started to well up inside me. Before I knew it, I was yelling. “I’m sorry! There’s something I need to do.” There was no basis for it, but for some reason, I had the feeling that deciphering the message on the bookmark would make things better. Kotomugi seemed to have figured out what was going on, and he raised his fishing rod in the air. “Good luck!” From there, I ran to the college library. It was deserted, and as I ran past the reception desk, someone called out behind me, “No running, please!” I calmed my heavy breathing and started searching for a braille dictionary. I’d never had to look for one before, so I didn’t know where to find it. I used one of the library computers to look up which shelf it was on. “I guess it’s sort of like a bucket list.” What was written on it? “You never know when you’re going to die.” She probably hadn’t been joking when she said that. Perhaps Fuyutsuki had been contending with her own fears. There was a chance that her long-held wishes were inscribed on that very bookmark. I couldn’t help but feel that was the case. As soon as I opened the thick braille dictionary, the smell of old books wafted toward me. I leafed through it, using the book’s instructions to help me decode the braille. I deciphered the text one letter at a time. All in all, it took me about three hours to decode just three lines. Line one: Go to a drinking party. Join a club. I burst into tears. My body shook as I sobbed. She’d gotten her high school equivalency diploma, gotten into college, and attended the welcome party… This was a girl who’d been trying to achieve her dreams, using this bookmark as a guide. Line two: Make friends. Go shopping. She had made friends. We had gone shopping for fireworks. I’d been there by her side. Thinking that brought me both happiness and pain. Line three: Set off fireworks. Fall in love. By the time I’d finished deciphering the text, I was sprawled across the table, bawling my eyes out. There was nobody else in the library. I didn’t need to hold back my tears. “You didn’t get to finish it.” That was why we’d gone to buy fireworks. That was why she’d told me she wanted to join a club. “You didn’t get to do it all.” Even I felt frustrated. I couldn’t stop crying. “Oh yeah,” I murmured. My mouth was moving on its own accord. “Yeah. That’s right.” “I think it would be wonderful if we could put on our own fireworks display. It’d be such a special day—a memory that would last a lifetime.” I thought about what Fuyutsuki had said. I could make her wish come true for her. I could launch those fireworks she’d been so desperate to see. I didn’t know how much longer she had left to live. “You never know when you’re going to die.” She was right about that. That was why we couldn’t give up. “We don’t have to just give up,” I muttered. It sounded almost as if I was trying to convince myself it was true. By the time I left the library, the sky had already turned red. The thunderclouds in the distance had vanished. There wasn’t a single cloud in the sunset above, and no sign of rain, either. I took out my phone and made a call.