Koyuki, completely unaware of the strategy meeting being held on her behalf, was curled up in her dimly-lit room—just as Naoya had predicted. She hadn’t brushed her signature silver hair, and her pajamas were a rumpled mess. She stared blankly at the wall with tear-stained eyes. Gizzard sat next to her. He was clearly worried about her condition, but knew that there wasn’t anything he could do to help her.
“What am I doing...?” she whispered, breaking the silence in her room. She didn’t know how many times she’d asked herself that question.
Her mother had left for her part time job, and Sakuya had already gone to school. Silence reigned over the house, and each minute, down to the very second, felt like it was being stretched to its absolute limit.
Koyuki continued to murmur to herself in the darkness. “It’s all Sasahara’s fault. Saying that he liked me while doing that... He’s so mean...”
Her reaction had been only natural, she continued to assure herself.
“I don’t think I’m blameless either, though,” she added, her eyebrows knitting together. She’d kept on coming back to that thought for a while now.
After the “incident,” he’d stood outside her door, apologizing over and over. He'd sent her several messages telling her how worried he was. And—on top of everything else—she knew that pushing her down had, in reality, been an accident.
Even though she knew all this, she continued to sulk like a stubborn child.
“I’m already horrible at dealing with confessions as is...”
It had all started during her elementary school days—back then, she had been a normal child, friendly and full of life. She had many friends, but one in particular was special. She spent every single day with this girl, and no matter where they went, they were always together. They always told each other, “I love you!” in the thoughtless, honest way that children do.
But one day, Koyuki’s sharp tongue had reared its ugly head. Her friend began to label her as “two-faced,” “haughty,” and “someone who looks down on others.” Koyuki hadn’t intended for that to happen, but she had no recourse to their insults. The next time Koyuki had tried to tell her friend “I love you,” her friend had replied “I can’t stand you.”
It was as if the world had been turned upside down. After that, she never spoke to the girl again. The next year, her ex-friend transferred to a different school and disappeared from Koyuki’s life forever.
Ever since then, Koyuki had been incapable of understanding love or affection. Even if she did like someone, she was unable to tell how the other person felt. She couldn’t trust whether or not their affection was real, so she chose to remain alone. Koyuki cut off all those around her, and thus “The Queen of Thorns” was born.
Koyuki heaved a heavy sigh. Naoya’s face appeared in her mind; he was the only thing she could think about. “Maybe things would’ve been better if I could understand people like Sasahara can... No, then I’d just be able to tell that everyone hates me,” she lamented, negative thoughts swirling about in her mind. “Sasahara just deals with all that in stride—he doesn’t let it get to him at all. He’s amazing, unlike me. God, I’m just the worst.”
He had given her an honest confession, and look at how she had reacted. Koyuki was certain at this point that the fault lay with her.
What if he hates me? Koyuki’s blood ran cold as the thought dawned on her. She hastily tried to assure herself that there was no way that was possible, but it was impossible to stop the negative spiral once it had begun.
Her nose started to itch, and her vision blurred. Then, just before the tears threatened to trickle down her face, she heard Gizzard stir.
“Meow!” Gizzard cried as he dashed to the window and stared outside. From her window, there was a view of their garden—that was the spot her cat was fixated on. Koyuki strained her ears and heard some rustling noises outside.
That was strange—usually her mother was the one who worked in the garden, but she wasn’t home yet...
Oh no! Is it a robber?! Koyuki’s face became white as a sheet. She knew her family lived in a nice area, but she also knew that being robbed wasn’t an impossibility. She made her way toward the window as silently as possible. When she peered outside and saw what was happening, she threw the window open and screamed, “What are you doing in my garden?!”
“Oops, busted,” Naoya said as he looked up. He was in the process of setting things up on a table.
Koyuki arrived in the garden about 10 minutes later. She had thrown a cardigan on over her pajamas; this, coupled with her sullen look, left her looking rather ragged.
Looks like she really has been dealing with this alone. I’m glad this actually managed to make her come outside, though, Naoya thought to himself. He was pleased that things were going relatively to plan, although he had hoped he’d have a little more time to set things up before she caught on. Oh well, this was fine, too. “Sorry, sorry. I didn’t think you’d catch me so quick.”
“Whatever. What are you doing, anyway?” Koyuki looked around restlessly.
The garden was spacious and bursting with various flowers in full bloom—it was obvious from just one look that it was well cared for. Naoya had placed a table he’d borrowed from their storage directly in the center of said garden. There were some paper cups on top of the table and a few paper bags by his feet.
“I’ve got permission from Sakuya by the way, just for the record. This isn’t technically trespassing,” he added.
“I didn’t hear anything about that...” Koyuki complained.
“Fine. Before I explain, though—here.”
“What’s this?”
Naoya had handed her a small device with a button that appeared to be a buzzer of some sort. Seeing Koyuki’s confused expression, he explained, “It’s a buzzer. If you press the button, it’ll make a noise. Sakuya, Yui, and Tatsumi are waiting outside. If they hear it, they’ll come running, so you don’t have to worry about anything like before happening.”
“That’s kind of a scary way to try and make me feel better!” Koyuki shouted.
Sakuya had questioned if the buzzer was a good idea, but Naoya had gone ahead with it anyway. He imagined that three nosy watchmen were peeking into the garden to check what the shouting was about.
Okay, so she’s got it. Now I’ve just gotta make sure she doesn’t use it, Naoya thought. He clenched his fists and bowed deeply to Koyuki. “I’m sorry about pushing you down like that.”
“N-No...” Koyuki replied, slowly shaking her head. Her gaze dropped to the floor and she intertwined her fingers. “I know it was an accident—it wasn’t your fault. My reaction was out of line...”
“Your reaction was totally natural.”
“No, I mean... Even so, I’m in the wrong here,” Koyuki shook her head more forcefully this time. They stood in silence for a long time. Her usual penchant for putting on airs was gone, replaced by a leaden, crushing self-loathing. “It’s always been like this... I’m just a coward who can’t be honest with myself or anyone else. I’ve been like this forever.”
Koyuki’s voice shook as she spoke. Tears began to trickle from her eyes, but she continued without wiping them. She told Naoya about the incident with her friend in elementary school and how, since then, she had been too afraid to accept anyone's affections.
“S-So when you told me you liked me, I was really happy. I wanted to give you a proper answer. I really did. B-But I didn’t know what to say, and I had no idea if it was okay for me to say it. My brain was all messed up...” She paused with another heavy sigh, as if her soul had left her body. “I figured it was a mistake to think someone could like me...”
“That’s where you’re wrong,” Naoya stated and grabbed Koyuki’s shoulders. She lifted her tear-stricken face and stared at Naoya in bewilderment. He spoke from his heart. “I’m glad I fell for you—I truly mean that. Please don’t say such depressing things. I want you to feel the same as I do.”
“B-But, s-someone like me...” she sputtered between sobs.
“Oh, come on. Here, stop crying,” he said as he offered her a handkerchief.
“I-Is this the...?”
“Yep, it’s the one you gave me. Didn’t think it’d come in handy this quickly,” he joked.
She took the handkerchief and dried her eyes with it. The dainty embroidered snowflakes met her tears and darkened in hue. Her cheeks and her nose were the red of a perfectly ripe fruit.
Naoya smiled at her and said, “You’re just overthinking things, Shirogane. If you don’t say something like, ‘How dare you do this to a lady such as me? You’re like a badly trained dog—you need to be executed,’ then I think I’m gonna go crazy.”
“I’m sorry... I’m not cute...”
“Have I ever said that? Anyway, I think I prefer your more refined look.”
“And I have a bad personality,” she whispered. Despite her words, some light had returned to her eyes.
“I need to apologize, too. I took things way too far back there and didn’t consider your feelings. We need to take things slowly—we’re both beginners here.” He never wanted these events to happen again.
“B-But if we take it slow, I don’t know when I’ll be able to accept your confession,” she protested.
“That’s fine. We’re both young, after all. You’ve got 70 years to think about it.”
“Stop being so optimistic...”