“You’re such a stupid girl, Hitomi-chan. It would’ve been fine if you’d just honestly believed me, like Utena did. But I’m surprised. Haha, to think that she actually jumped off.” Kurashima gave a sidelong glance toward the remains of Utena, which remained scattered off to the side. “As expected, that hurt my heart a little, because I’m not really a murderer. It’s stressful, you know, to trick and kill girls. That girl, she said she wanted to become an idol. She was really happy when I said I’d introduce her to a major production company.” Kurashima put the knife to my neck. He probably doesn’t want to dirty his own hands— he’d avoid it if he could. I understand, I hate it, too. I guess he plans to leave my murder to the giant slug; he’s just making sure I don’t manage to run away.
Wiping away the mucus and my own tears, I stared at Kurashima. I understood. Ah, so it was like that. Utena was serious. She was trying to pursue her dream earnestly, with all her might. When someone offered mediation to help grant her dreams, she pushed forward unhesitatingly. Torii, Kousuke, and even Utena herself, had said that she fell in love easily. So Utena had fallen in love at first sight with Kurashima, who has good looks... She wasn’t a stupid girl in love, who would believe anything her partner said. Because she had a dream she chased after dearly.
She believed in Kurashima’s halfhearted explanation. To try and escape by dying; it must have been so scary for her. Eyes closed and trembling, she jumped to her death, because she wanted to be an idol like who she said her mother was, Hanemori Joururi. For that, she was prepared to throw away everything and push forward. Her dream ended here, in the hands of unreasonable malice.
Of course, I don’t have the qualifications to blame Kurashima one-sidedly. I just decided that our town’s princess was unapproachable... Right up until the end, I was stupidly formal, using that excuse to keep my distance from her. Basically, we never even talked.
If only I’d faced her properly. If only I’d opened up my heart, and talked without hiding anything. She should have been able to realize that she was being tricked by Kurashima. We should’ve been able to change this tragedy, this ending with no salvation in sight. To think that you could escape by dying. Such an idiotic evil should have been wiped away.
But it’s too late to regret now. Utena had jumped, and died in a pulpy mess. I’m alive— but what can I even do? How do I turn this situation around? No. Even if, right this instant, a miracle happened, and both Kurashima and the giant slug were thrown off of me... Even if I survived, what would come of it? I have nothing, nothing... I’m different from Utena, I just live every day passively. My life was a boring one. I was just rotting away slowly. She had dreams, fell in love, cried, laughed, and got mad— just like a storybook protagonist. Compared to Utena, who faced her life with all her might and then died, what does it matter if I survive?
My heart felt like it was going to break. I was going to stop caring about everything. Lying face down, I felt powerless— and then I realized that something in my pocket was shivering. Caressing it, it felt a little like something I recognized. Suffering, and feeling the pressure of the giant slug that was glued to my back, I cowered. And so Kurashima wouldn’t be able to notice, I checked on the shivering thing.
“What’s wrong? Sorry, just think of it as your bad luck, and give up.” Seeing me all curled up, Kurashima made a troubled face. “You really are completely unrelated, aren’t you?”
“Kurashima-san.” I immediately turned back, pretending that nothing had happened— and I looked at Kurashima. “What you talked about earlier, it wasn’t about Kousuke... I think it was about you, Kurashima-san. But there’s something I don’t quite understand.” Acting inappropriately calm, even for me, I asked, even though I wasn’t really interested. “Why are you trying to kill Kagamimori-san— no, all of us? What’s your motivation? What kind of relation do you have to us?”
“You might not know,” he said, “but a long time ago, there was a person named Hanemori Joururi.”
There’s that name again. Who the heck is she? She’s an idol and Utena’s mother, or at least, Utena said that she was. If I had known that I was going to be involved with that name this much, I would have paid more attention to the TV. Even though I did remember seeing her name on TV, somewhere. But, thinking that it had nothing to do with my life, I let it go. I’m regretting that now.
“Someone had their life messed up by her. This is revenge for that, I hope. That’s why, truly, you have nothing to do with this, but...I can’t let you live so that you can testify to what I did here. Incidentally, I’ll be ending you now— sorry?” As I thought, Kurashima was looking at me remorsefully. It seems he had no other option— really, why am I about to be killed by this guy? Of course, the situation started moving before I was able to understand it.
“If you’re gonna say, ‘Sorry,’ then don’t do it in the first place.” At the same time I heard that sudden voice, there was also the sound of a light blow being landed. Before I realized it, Kousuke had snuck up behind Kurashima, and hit him with a small portable TV. Who knows where he managed to find that, though. Kurashima fell to the side without a word, and my childhood friend hit him, over and over again, while he was helpless.
You’re late, I thought, though he did look just a bit like a Tokusatsu hero, though.