A person’s most available example for raising children was their own parents. Even if they didn’t consciously think about how they’d been raised, it had an effect. When they weren’t confident with themselves, they would even mimic the things they’d hated.
“There are tons of things I still don’t know,” Emiko conceded. Then she added, “But even so, right now, I’m having fun meeting lots of people and getting excited.”
“Something is wrong with you, Mom. You sound like Mizuki. You’re almost seventy!”
Just as Mayumi was shaking her head…
“Do it, Grandma.”
Mizuki, who’d slipped into the living room without them noticing, stood beside Emiko. Eyebrows narrowed, she glared at her mother.
“I went to that bookstore with Grandma, and it wasn’t the least bit sus. I’ve been to a shared bookstore before, and I know what sort of people are interested in it and gather there. No one was pushing her to become a shelf owner. She thought it over herself and chose to do it. Why won’t you believe in her?” Mizuki pressed further, saying, “All you do is reject things, Mom. All you do is say no to everything.”
Mayumi forced a smile as she tried to argue back. “No, I don’t. I just want you both to think hard before you decide on things, instead of getting carried away and—”
“It’s ’cause you don’t have anything you want to do, Mom,” Mizuki cut in. “That’s why you don’t understand Grandma and me, and try to get in our way.”
The expression on Mayumi’s face changed instantly. Her lips tightened as she held back her anger, clenching her fists tight, but Mizuki pressed on.
“It pisses me off how you think that you’ve gotta work all because of me. If you want to make excuses about how you don’t have the time for hobbies, then you should—”
Mayumi suddenly raised her arm in the air, and Mizuki shut her mouth, realizing she’d gone too far. Emiko realized that this was bad, but she was already too late. Mayumi had slapped Mizuki across the face. And right after the dry smack rang out…
“What are you doing?!” Mizuki cried, voice loud enough to echo through the whole house as she grabbed Mayumi by the hair.
“Wait, stop, please!”
Emiko rushed in between them, pushing Mizuki’s arm down. Her granddaughter kept on glaring at her mother, looking like she was about to cry.
Why is all this happening?
“Mayumi, go up to your room. Quickly!”
Her daughter stood there stunned, looking as if she couldn’t believe what she’d just done. She finally headed back to her room, not meeting either of their eyes. The moment Emiko let go of her, Mizuki started to cry.
“I’m sorry. Me holding you back like that must have hurt.”
In all the fuss, Emiko had been gripping onto Mizuki’s arm harder than she thought she ever could have. Her fingers had left red marks on Mizuki’s wrist, and as she rubbed them, her granddaughter shook her head.
“I’m sorry.”
Murmuring that as if to no one in particular, Mizuki bolted out of the living room and up the stairs.
Emiko flopped down to the floor, her heart still racing. She knew that Mizuki accusing her mother of not having any aspirations had hurt Mayumi deeply.
Mayumi had loved books in the past, to the point where she couldn’t think of anything else when asked about her hobbies. When she was little, Emiko and her husband had decided something: Their daughter was a girl who didn’t want any toys when they offered to buy her anything, but she loved books, so they would buy her lots of those, at the very least. She always picked them out herself, and would never even look the titles her parents would suggest. She was quiet, and not very good at putting her opinions into words, but she definitely had her own thoughts.
When she and her husband had split, Mayumi had put a lot of effort into her job, knowing that she had to raise Mizuki with her own power. The reason she’d come back to her family home had been because she thought that living near her mother was showing her devotion to her parents. Emiko knew that the reason she let her do the chores instead of doing them herself was because she wanted to give her a reason to live.
As they aged, a child and their parents would switch positions. But no matter how old they became, and even if they couldn’t do everything that they used to be able to do, parents would keep on watching over their children with the same unchanging love. Would it be all right for Emiko to show that love?
Standing up, Emiko headed to Mayumi’s room. When she called out to her from outside, the door opened. Mayumi was still in her suit, seemingly not having sorted out her thoughts yet. She was pale, looking down at her feet.
“It’s all right.”
Wrapping an arm around her, Emiko rubbed Mayumi’s back. Ever since she was little, even when she was hurt enough to cry, her daughter would hold back, saying nothing. Whenever that happened, Emiko would do this, staying with her until she calmed down.
“After you get changed, let’s eat supper. I know you aren’t in the mood for it, but Mizuki cooked tonight. She wanted to eat together, all three of us for once.”
Mayumi looked up. “Mizuki did?”
Up until then, Mizuki wouldn’t even put the rice in the rice cooker when asked to help. She was probably thinking about that.