I think people find value and strive for the things they can’t have—the things that don’t come easily. In the end, we all have to play with the hand we’re dealt, but there’ll always be something in our hand we’re unhappy with. Someone else will be envious of one of your cards while you yourself are unable to see its worth.
I know I sound like I’m bragging, but I do have a past life. My home in my past life was even better off than Paul’s, and as far as talent goes, if I hadn’t given up, I could’ve made something of myself. I’m probably better looking now, but if I’d exercised and slimmed down a bit, and groomed my hair and eyebrows, I wouldn’t have looked half bad. Looking back, I had way more advantages back then than in this life. Despite all that, despite the privilege I had, I stayed a garbage person. When I died, that was what I regretted. So even if I hadn’t been born in a peaceful village like Buena, even if it had been the slums of the Conflict Zone, or if I’d been abused by my parents, or if when I first opened a magic textbook I hadn’t managed to whip up so much as a water bomb… I feel like I’d have still tried my best. I doubt my life would have been as happy as this one. I might have resented the world more. But if nothing else, I think I’d have acted more than I did in my previous life. I think I would have lived with the desperation of a drowning man. I’m sure that life would have been worth more than my previous one.
If anything, even if that truck hadn’t hit me and I’d gone on living in my original world without getting reincarnated, if I’d only had a bit of luck, I might have been able to apply myself. Well, okay, it wouldn’t have been easy. I was an incredible sulk back then, so it took the jumbo-size helping of luck that let me be reincarnated to finally get me moving.
What I’m trying to say is that circumstances are all relative, and sometimes “good circumstances” actually means having a few things that seem like disadvantages.
I’m not here to tell you not to blame things on the way things are for you. I know I’ve been privileged. I try to remember there are people in terrible circumstances out there. I don’t mean to pretend to know what that’s like. All I’m saying is that, whether you get a good hand or a bad one, if you want to be satisfied with your life, you have to live life as hard and as fully as you can.
It’s not like those classmates of Chris’s were that badly off. I guess they were unlucky with their parents, but they had enough drive to get into school through their own efforts and to work towards their goals.
Anyway, for my part, I’ve given my all to my life in this world. Naturally, I’m going to continue to do so. Maybe to others, my “all” seemed a little shallow and unserious. Don’t other people’s lives always seem that way? And no matter what anyone says about you, it’s not going to change your life, so why care about it? You know?
So, hey, if you’re reading this, live your life to the fullest… Ugh, we’re getting real preachy here, huh? I must be getting old. I guess it’s happened. I’ve become a dad.
Right, that’s enough talk about circumstances. It turned into a bit of a lecture.
Now, I wonder who decoded my language. Maybe a scholar or something? Or a magician, expecting some amazing magical secret concealed within the pages of my diary… Either way, sorry for the lack of amazing secrets. I’ve said pretty much all of what I know about magic to Roxy, so it should all be available for you to learn about at the Ranoa Magic University or the Asuran Institute of Magic.
If I were to give one piece of advice to those who follow in my footsteps, it would be that whether you want to learn voiced casting, silent spellcasting, casting with magic circles, or whatever happens to be the hot thing in your day, then reader, you must practice. You cast the same spell over and over again until your head’s spinning, then when you’re resting, you think up clever ways to use it. You devote yourself to it fully.
If you do that, even if you’re not a once-in-a-generation genius, you’ll be skilled enough to earn the respect of your peers.
Right! One more thing. If you’re thinking about translating this diary to offer it up to the ruler of some country, don’t. I get it, translating the language of a different world is impressive, and you want your success to be praised. You want appropriate compensation for your efforts. Thing is, there’s some stuff written in here that looks bad for the Asuran royal family in particular. There’s no way they’ll stand for claims like “the Asuran queen was Dragon God Orsted’s puppet!” It’s their prestige on the line, you know? Ariel might settle for just locking you up, but I can’t guarantee her descendants will spare your life. I guess if all the nations that appear in this diary have disappeared clean off the face of the world, then you can do what you like.
Huh. I suppose if that much time has passed, you might be a historian. If so, I hope you’ll reference this extensively as an example of an ordinary family in this period. Only, I did use my knowledge from my past life to reinvent some uncommon gadgets, so don’t rely on it too much.
And yeah…one more thing. Just in case whoever’s reading this is someone from the same world as me. If, unlike me, you want to go home…I’ll give you a piece of advice.
“There is a way to return to your old world. Follow in the footsteps of Silent Sevenstar.”
Oh yeah, and if you ever dream of a white space with some pixelated asshole giving you advice, hard pass. He’s a liar, got it?
Rudeus, over and out.