“N-No, I could simply be mistaken. Calm down, Colette. Let’s confirm it one more time,” she said to herself. “The opponent facing us during my ceremony will be Mysterious Swordsman S. Who the heck is that?!”
Indeed. The name she saw was not a real one but an alias. Everyone else knew who they were fighting, but all Colette had was “Mysterious Swordsman S.” There was no point in even telling her that, since it offered no clue as to her opponent’s identity.
“Um, let’s just calm down. It’s not as if there are no hints. My opponent is a mysterious swordsman, and the name is S... All things considered, I would first think of Sylvia. But she’s fighting Shutola. Also, there’s no way she would do something this roundabout. Which leaves...” Colette muttered to herself.
After some time racking her brain, it seemed she was able to figure out her opponent from the clues given to her. There wasn’t a lot of information, but there would only be a few people capable of making it through the preliminaries. Colette boasted a sharp mind to rival Shutola’s, and it didn’t take long for her to find the answer.
“It couldn’t be...” she breathed.
“Ho there, you seem worried about something. If you’d like, I can listen to you, Colette.”
A voice suddenly came from behind her. And it just so happened that the owner of that voice was the person who had popped into her mind as a possible opponent. The timing was too perfect, and it turned her suspicions into certainty.
“The Great Cathedral is off-limits during this time when the Oracle prays. You should know this, Serge-sama,” she said.
Colette turned around to see exactly who she was expecting: Serge Flore, former Defender of the Apostles and self-proclaimed strongest Hero. But in truth, she was just a free spirit who wielded those titles whenever it suited her.
“Aww, no need to be so uptight. I am technically affiliated with Deramis, you know? Also, wasn’t there something you wanted to ask me? I can tell from your face!” Serge said teasingly.
Colette sighed. “You’re acting so suspicious, I’m actually starting to think I’m wrong. So allow me to be straight with you. Are you the Mysterious Swordsman S who is going to be fighting me at my wedding?”
Colette accentuated her accusation with a flourish, pointing straight at Serge, as though exposing a culprit in a murder mystery.
There was a pause before Serge replied. “Oh? And what makes you think that?”
“I don’t know why you hid your name, but you are one of the best—no, the best swordfighter in the world,” said Colette. “There aren’t many who have the strength to participate in this event. Also, your name has the initial S. And then you showed up here, with this timing? It’s too unnatural—everything seems to point at you. Am I wrong?”
“Oho, certainly. Those are very good reasons. A wonderful deduction!” said Serge. Her smile was bold as she nodded over and over, clapping as if praising Colette. However... “Heh heh heh, to tell you the truth...” Serge paused. “Too bad! You’re wrong! I’m not fighting you!”
“I see. I knew you were Mysterious Swordsman S— Wait, what?! I’m wrong?!” Colette shouted. “All this after leading me on so much?! Are you joking?!”
“Yes, I did lead you on, but I’m not joking,” said Serge. “Honestly. But I could give you a hint. Actually...”
Pub, Adventurer’s Guild Headquarters
“No, no, no! No... No, no, no! Why do I have to be the one?!” Ange screamed.
While Serge was giving out hints, Ange’s scream rumbled throughout the Director’s Room in the Adventurer’s Guild Headquarters. She’d come to tell Shin in person that she would be rejecting Pub as a venue for her ceremony. With perfect timing, though, the room froze over.
“Hey, what’s with you all of a sudden?” Shin asked. “Did you get a premonition of the world ending or something? Oh no, what should we do?” She was sitting across from Ange, enjoying a cigar.
“Oh, no. But I guess it’s kind of close to that for me personally,” Ange replied. “Maybe, anyway! Listen to this, Director Shin! My opponent for the objection thing is Maria-san!”
“Oh? Good for you. You pulled the jackpot; she’s just as strong as Addams,” said Shin.
“Not a jackpot!” Ange shouted in reply. “The exact opposite, actually! My abilities do nothing against her and her weird immortality! She’ll just regenerate her head no matter how many times I take it! This is the worst! She’s basically un-assassinate-able!”
“Well, the fight will probably only last seconds against that monster,” Shin admitted. “I can even imagine her counterattacking while having her head cut off.” She spoke in between puffs of her cigar, talking as if it were someone else’s problem.
“Jeez! You don’t care at all, do you?! You’re acting as if this has nothing to do with you!” Ange complained.
“I mean, it doesn’t,” said Shin.
“Boo! Boooooo!” Ange yelled.
“Agh, okay. Okay, I get it. Stop making so much noise. All this racket’s gonna stop me from finishing what little work I actually do. If you’re going to be like this, I guess I can give you some advice as someone who actually has experience fighting Maria.”
“Wow, I knew you’d come through, Director! You’re so reliable!” Ange gushed.
Her expression did a one-eighty, clearly communicating how much she’d been waiting to hear that.
This girl was aiming for it the entire time, wasn’t she? Shin thought suspiciously as she stubbed out her finished cigar in her ashtray.
“The thing to watch out for when facing a battle with Maria is...not to fight her!” Shin revealed.
“Aha, I see! That’s so useful!” Ange exclaimed before a pause. “So, what about your real advice?”
Shin answered with a confused noise. “I wasn’t joking, though... Seriously, it would be best to just give up.”
“You know what? Your advice is the joke!” Ange shouted, her despair deepening all at once.
“You say that, but she’s a monster that defies logic,” said Shin. “No matter how much damage you deal her, she’ll instantly recover. There’s nothing you can do. Even if you were able to reduce her HP to zero in one strike, you’d fail as long as there was a single speck of flesh left. And a battle of attrition is out too. Even if you fought for several weeks straight, you’d never even see a hint of her stamina or energy running out. You can’t even imagine that happening, right? Well, to be fair, a battle of attrition isn’t something that should be used for entertainment during a wedding anyway.”
“Urgk...” Ange muttered.
“On top of that, you’re done for if you take even a single hit from her,” Shin continued. “Maria has only shown a hint of her true strength, and that was already crazy enough. A light slap from her was enough to shatter my prized Jildora-made weapons. I can’t even imagine how crazy her speed would be if she were to go all out... Heh, just imagining it makes me want to throw up! Yeah, giving up would be best!”
“Urrghh...”
The more Ange listened to Shin talk, the more she could feel her chances of victory in this event slipping away. She was ready to cry.
“So that’s my advice,” Shin concluded. “What will you do? Give up? If you’re going to graciously concede, I can give you one of my cigars as a consolation prize.”
“Uggghhh... Yeah, okay, I knew it’d be like this! I get it now!” Ange shouted.
“Oh?”
Ange had looked back up the instant Shin had concluded her “advice,” and for some reason she seemed full of motivation. Her eyes were full of life, and she wore a defiant smile.
“I know best that Maria-san is crazy; I’m really good at estimating combat strength!” Ange declared. “But neither Kelvin nor I will give up! In fact, she can bring it on! I’m fired up! Winning an upset would be the best spice to liven up the ceremony!”
Shin was silent for a moment. “Heh, Riold has quite the stubborn little junior. Well, as your senior, I’ll be cheering you on. Do your best.”
“I will,” Ange replied. “’Kay, then, I gotta go think up some countermeasures!”
With that, she dashed out of the director’s office. She was hurrying as much as she could, even using her abilities to pass through the wall on her way out.
There was a beat of silence before Shin said, “Oh, fine. I have a debt for being selfish and stealing an eye, so I guess I can help Riold’s cute little junior out a bit.”