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““They’re not coming.””
I wasn’t even sure how long it had been since we’d gotten ourselves sent here. Aqua and I had been in a corner of the room, passing the time by playing children’s games, but there was no sign that anyone else was about to show up.
“What’s going on here?” I said, scratching my chin. “Does this mean not even one of them fell into that cunning trap? No, that’s ridiculous…”
Aqua nodded along. “It’s so cunning, maybe they didn’t even notice it. We’re talking about Megumin and Darkness here. Megumin only thinks about breaking things, and Darkness only thinks about running into things. They’re not exactly the brainiest pair.”
Ah, yes, that made sense.
“Well, this sucks. They get lost, and we have to work our way back to find them.”
“I guess so. Gosh, we take our eyes off them for one second and they practically disappear. They really can’t survive without me, can they?”
Considering that we were separated from the others, we could say whatever we wanted about them, just between the two of us.
Guess we can’t hang out here forever, though.
But how were we supposed to find the others again? I glanced around the room, but there was nothing that looked like it would teleport us back to our starting point. Nos had said this was the highest floor. In other words, that teleporter had sent us to the final part of the last dungeon.
“Hey, Aqua… Which is better? The two of us searching blindly around the Demon King’s dangerous, deadly castle all by ourselves? Or just teleporting straight home?”
“I vote for teleporting home.”
It was nice to know we were on the same page when it mattered.
“I’d really like to vote for that, too… But I can’t imagine Megumin and Darkness giving up on their love interest (namely, me) and just going home. What to do; what to do?”
“Good question… And I can’t believe they would go home without finding me, whom they worship.”
We continued to say things that would have made the other two very angry if they’d been there. And we kept waiting.
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That was when it happened.
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“…? I heard some sort of scuffling in the distance. Wait here a second,” I said. I could hear someone running outside the room. I activated my Eavesdrop skill again to get a sense of what was going on.
“Reinforcements! Call for reinforcements!”
“Everyone from the upper floors, head downstairs! The intruders are making a real mess of things! They broke through the barrier, and they’re forcing their way up!”
“Nooo! I heard that working as castle guard was supposed to be easy and safe! The elite of the elite! I, uh, just remembered I forgot to feed my pet Neroid! Can I go home?!”
It sounded like Mitsurugi, Yunyun, and the others were on the hunt for us and getting violent. So…did that mean it was better to wait here a while longer?
“Sounds like the others are fighting their way up here and making good time,” I said.
“Ah, I’d expect no less from my chosen legendary followers. Mm, heroes rescuing a goddess trapped in the Demon King’s castle. The saga practically writes itself, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah, except it’s more rescuing a goddess who ran away from home, got lost, and finally stumbled into a trap, so that she was stuck in the Demon King’s castle and didn’t know which way was up.” Aqua, sitting and pulling her knees into her chest beside me, gave me a displeased shove in the shoulder. That reminded me, though. “When we see Megumin and Darkness again, make sure to apologize, okay? I can pretty much promise you you’re going to get a good long lecture from Darkness when we return home. And I know Megumin is usually right with you when you get that kind of scolding, but I don’t think she’s going to cover for you this time.”
“Hey, um, Kazuma… When we get back home, I’ll give you my very special, strangely shaped rock if you’ll speak up for me. The truth is, even I know I kind of screwed up this time.”
Just kind of? Even I wanted to give her a lecture for that, but starting her weeping here and now wouldn’t solve anything. Anyway, I was sure the other two would give her more than enough grief to cover all three of us.
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Besides, there were so many other things I’d meant to say when I saw her. I was going to tell her how I, the consummate slacker, had trained myself up in a dungeon just for her sake, and how I’d bankrupted myself to bring down that barrier, and how she’d worried everyone in Axel—and that was just for starters.
I could tell her how Wiz and Vanir, the typical goddess’s archenemies, had helped me help her. I could gripe about what had happened on my most recent journey and how hopeless the Axis Church was. There were lots of other things I could say, too, but when I saw her dumb face just looking completely relieved…
“…? What’s going on? Why are you giving me that weird look? Are you that profoundly moved to see your goddess in the flesh after being apart for so long? If you’ve finally started to revere me a little, then you can prove it by making whatever side dish I want at dinner every ni— Ow! Ow, that hurts! I’m sorry—I didn’t mean to get carried away! Ooh, but then again, we haven’t shared a moment like this in a long time, either!”
I grabbed Aqua by the cheek, and even though I was angry with her, she looked a little bit happy about it.
At that moment, though, my Eavesdrop skill let me in on another conversation…
“All right, listen up, everybody! As you well know, the Demon King’s honored daughter has taken a huge army to settle the score with humanity. At this very moment, she’s smashing through an entire squadron of human knights! If anyone found out that while she was grinding an entire army under her heel, those of us who are supposed to be protecting the castle couldn’t even corral a handful of intruders, there are going to be some very uncomfortable questions! So starting now, we’re going to go through every room on every floor with a fine-tooth comb! We’re going to find those invaders and tear them apart!”
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“Uh, Kazuma, are they really going to do that? I’ve been in some tight spots before, but I’ve got the bad feeling to end all bad feelings right now…”
“Yeah, well, if they come looking in this room, we’re finished. I’m scared, too, but I’m not the one who went toddling off to the Demon King’s castle. Besides, this might actually be our chance to take down His Majesty himself, right?”
At this rate, they were going to find us eventually. So I decided to try an all-or-nothing plan.
“Yeah, you’re right, but I’m sort of finding I don’t really care about the Demon King right now. I was so relieved to see you, and now I want to hurry up and find the others and go home.”
Some goddess! What was that letter about, then?
Still, I totally understood how she felt.
“I’m not exactly eager to go running off to the Demon King myself. But everyone else is, all right? What do you think will happen if the two of us show up like, Hey, we’re kinda scared of the Demon King, so we’re going home?”
“I think they might just stone us to death. And I’m not sure we’d be able to object.”
“Right? So first things first, we have to get out of this room and link up with the others. After that, if we can just make it to the Demon King’s chamber, I’ve got an idea. I’ll show you my real killer move.” As I spoke, I carefully adjusted my helmet.