“What are you supposed to do when the dream you’ve been chasing after for so long doesn’t hold up to your ideals?”
After everything was over, she and I didn’t say a thing. We walked back to the same restaurant we always went to. Finally, on the way, she asked me that question.
The look in her eyes was somber and perplexed.
“That’s a difficult question.”
Unlike her father, who had looked delighted after accomplishing his goal of many years, Ashley was wearing an expression of despair. Her ideals and her reality were too far out of alignment. All the stories she had heard from her father when she was a child had ultimately turned out to be just fantastic tales.
It may be that people aren’t capable of living up to their ideals. Living your life chasing an ideal is hard work. You often hear stories about people who run out into the big beautiful world with a dream, only to find there isn’t a single flower blooming when they arrive at their destination.
And what should they do when that happens?
“Most people just get used to living with the disappointment of reality.”
There’s nothing you can do about the fact that reality doesn’t live up to your ideals, after all.
“The normal thing to do is resign yourself to the fact that dreams are dreams and endure as you live on.”
“……”
“And then before long, you’re sure to forget what dreams you even used to have.”
“…Seems kind of sad.”
“It sure is.”
“……” Ashley kept her eyes fixed on the ground as she asked me one more question. “What about you, Elaina?”
“What about me?”
“If the ideals you were chasing turned out to be incompatible with reality, if it was you, what would you do?”
“That’s a difficult question.”
If it was me, what would I do?
I pondered over what I had done when I set out on a journey, dreaming of the stories I had read in a book, and found that reality was not always nearly as lovely as those stories. As I thought back on it, as I searched through my memories, I spoke to her as if I was beginning to tell a tale.
“When it happened to me, I, too, did the same thing that others do.”
I was also hurt and disappointed by a reality that was rarely so neat and pretty, and then I came to terms with it and went on with my life.
“……”
Apparently, Ashley didn’t like my answer. Her expression clouded over even more.
“So that’s really how it goes, is it?” she asked.
“That’s really how it goes.” I nodded.
“But,” I continued, “I don’t think my life changed all that much just because it didn’t go according to my ideals.”
“……?”
She tilted her head questioningly, and I threw out my chest self-importantly and offered her the following insights.
“My dream was to travel, but I didn’t stop traveling or anything just because my journey didn’t go according to my expectations.”
“……”
“My dreams were the reason why I chose this path, but they don’t dictate my whole life.”
By the way, I did have my own doubts along the way.
“Was your reason for leaving home to find the goddesses?”
“Huh?”
“Watching you for this last little while, you’ve got a look on your face like the world is ending, but if I remember what you told me correctly, your dream was aspiring after those stories that your father told you, wasn’t it?”
“…It was, but…” Keeping her voice low as if holding back so that her father, who was not even there, wouldn’t hear her, she said, “But the things my father was doing aren’t in line with my ideals, so…”
“You’ve lost sight of the reason why you’ve been chasing your dreams?”
“I was thinking, what’s the purpose of everything I’ve done so far? At the very least, I know the dream I’ve been chasing doesn’t involve kidnapping baby birds,” she mumbled.
No, I don’t suppose so.
“I just don’t know what I should do.”
Ashley was at a loss.
“What do you want to do? What would the person you’ve been up until now do?” I asked her.
“……”
And she answered me.
By the way, I remembered one thing about her.
She was a good person, but at the same time, she was also a rebellious daughter.
✦ ✦ ✦
“But wow, I never would have expected your daughter to show up with a goddess tear! This time, we can chalk up our success to a real miracle!”
After their great success, the adventurers spent the afternoon sitting around a table drinking. There was Ashley’s father, with his bow on his back. There was another man who was a swordsman, who clapped Ashley’s father on the shoulder, celebrating their recent accomplishment. There was one man with an ax who was quietly enjoying his drinks. And there was the mage, who was tending to her wand.
Altogether, there were four of them.
“Well, it might just have been a miracle, you know.” Ashley’s father nodded in agreement and said something a little strange. “Actually, I never told you guys this, but I’ve known for a little while that she was somewhere near this city.”
✦ ✦ ✦
