Epilogue
“I HAVE A QUESTION.”
“What?”
“In the short time since we last met, have you given up your humanity?”
“How rude, Colonel. You’re crossing the line with that one.”
We were now in the control room of the sea of blood that was the pirates’ base. It was true that I might’ve gotten a little carried away hunting the pirates; I’d killed roughly 70 percent of them on my own before realizing it, which I had to admit was a bit excessive. But suggesting that I was no longer human was going a little too far. What slander.
“I mean, how else do you explain this? It hasn’t been that long since we sparred with each other.”
“My hard work must be bearing fruit by unleashing my latent abilities.”
“That’s really not a good enough excuse to play this off. I saw an image of the hole you entered the base through. How did you damage that spot so badly? It definitely wasn’t the work of a plasma grenade.”
“Trade secret.”
If I said, “I slammed the wall with telekinesis,” I’d absolutely have gotten myself labeled “no longer human.” It wasn’t like that label would change anything, but part of me stubbornly refused to accept it.
“The combat bots have finished withdrawing, Master.”
“Good work. Any damage?”
Mei had been commanding the combat bots from orbit in the Black Lotus. She was probably fine, since she’d mostly served as support this time, but I’d decided to check in anyway.
“None. The Black Lotus will arrive soon.”
“Got it. All right, there’s nothing left for me to do here, so I’ll head back to my ship.”
Serena hesitated. “The innocent young girl in my heart is screaming at me in refusal, but the calm and collected colonel of the Imperial Fleet can’t find a logical reason to stop you. You’re free to go.”
“Wait. Does that mean you’ll hold a personal grudge?! What a pain in the ass!”
It’s that other damn side of you, Colonel. She was actually letting me off easy, though. I wasn’t sure how to react to her being so nice to me, surrounded by this sea of blood flowing from the remains of what were recently living humans. A sea of blood created by me.
✦ ✦ ✦
I walked directly back to the Black Lotus, which had descended to retrieve the combat bots. The twins awaited me there, and they helped me with the sanitization procedures for the ninja armor. That finished, I was finally able to take a breather.
The moment I sat on the sofa, Tina threw her upper body onto my lap. “Boom!” The three of us had just stepped out of the shower we’d taken together.
“You want some attention? Here you go!”
“Nyooah!”
She twisted around to look up at me, so I cupped both her cheeks in my palms. “Acchonburike.” Heh heh… What sinfully plump cheeks. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of this.
Seeing me play with Tina, Wiska walked over and planted her cheek against the back of my palm. “Mnn.”
“Oh, who’s this cute little thing?” Is she a dog? Who’s a good girl?
“Mmmyu nyu nyu nyu!”
“Don’t you have to do some combat-bot maintenance?” I asked Tina as I fondled Wiska’s cheeks.
She laid her head on my lap and looked up at me as she answered, “They’re made by the great Eagle Dynamics, so there’s not much we have to do. Since you bought the full package, hon, maintenance is practically automated—though we do need to conduct final checks once they’re done.”
“I see. Right. You don’t have any more Bikkuri Dokkiri mecha waiting for me, do you? Those assault pods were really a shock.”
“Hon, didn’t you read the list when we bought all those?”
“I only skimmed through. It seemed fine to me then, so I just went ahead and paid.”
And it was too complicated for me to understand, I deadpanned internally. I’d ultimately made the decision based entirely on what I understood of the equipment’s specs and versatility. It seemed I’d have to ask the twins to fill me in on the rest later.
“Those things aren’t cheap,” Wiska told me. “You’re surprisingly strict about some things, then surprisingly loose about others.”
“He’s one of those rich guys who’ll spend their entire fortune without realizin’ it! People like us have to be way stricter ’bout how we spend our money.”
“You might be,” I replied, “but I don’t think you can say the same of Wiska. She almost bought some random object from that artifact shop.”
“Ugh… Th-that was just a momentary lapse of reason.”
As we chatted, my terminal received a message informing me that Elma was returning to the Black Lotus. It seemed the previous state of alert had been lifted, since we’d defeated the pirates and achieved peaceful communications with Mr. Tetrahedron.
“Elma says she’s en route back here.”
“We won’t be able to monopolize you for much longer,” Wiska said.
“A short-lived reign,” Tina added. “Guess we’ve just gotta enjoy it as much as we can before she’s back!”
I patted Tina’s head as she rubbed her cheeks against my thighs. So is Tina a cat? There, there. Theeere, there.
In the end, the potentially disastrous contact with the unknown here at this edge world had seemingly resolved more peacefully and smoothly than expected. There was no way that things would suddenly go south and put us in dire straits. Gah ha ha… I won!