“That giant eucharist is still quite far… Could I have a moment?” asked Cattlea, gazing at the creature off in the distance. “I want you to fight as you wish on this battlefield, Ayaka.”
“I…”
I suppose someone has told her about me, then.
When the Alionese knights had ridden out against Nyantan and her escape party, Ayaka had struck down every last eucharist they had brought with them.
But I…
Once their eucharists were gone, the men began to beg for their lives.
When I saw them…I tried to tighten my grip on the unique skill sword in my hands. Then Nyantan took a knife to the knights’ throats and slit them all.
I just stood there and watched. Back then, I…I think I was going to kill them too. I knew if I let them go that they would take information back to Alion and put my classmates in danger all over again. I had to do it. I’d made up my mind. I’d decided, and yet…
“You’ve only just reunited with these heroes. We don’t need to let them see you become a murderer,” Nyantan had said.
She was being considerate.
But in the fight against Mira, I killed people with my own hands. I did everything I could to reduce the number of casualties. I tried, at least. But I’m sure that some of those I came upon on the battlefield were dead, whether by my hand or indirectly.
“I fought alongside you in the war against Mira. I know you had no love for needless slaughter there,” said Cattlea, bringing her horse level with Ayaka’s. “I imagine that is precisely why the soldiers of Mira have been so willing to fight by your side. The successor to the House of Ord, who is presently engaged in combat in the center of our lines, was captured by you…but you did not kill him. Now Chester Ord has returned to battle, and you stand by his side as an ally to our cause. The man is loved by his men. They would never have forgiven you for killing him.”
Cattlea smiled at her encouragingly.
“Do you understand? Yesterday’s enemy is today’s friend. But this can never be true when you kill your enemies.”
“…”
“There are times when being merciless can prove effective. But in your case, I believe the results you have demonstrated on the battlefield speak for themselves. You have been fighting well enough, no?”
“But I…”
“I also hear that you have repented and wish to improve yourself. You have the courage to blame yourself. I believe that is precisely what it takes to be a hero.”
“A h-hero…?”
“Nobody in this world is perfect. People make mistakes. I have. What is important is how we confront our mistakes. You didn’t run from yours—you faced them head on and suffered long and hard as a result. That is nothing to be ashamed of. You are courageous for being able to learn from your missteps.”
“…Thank you.”
Cattlea laughed, then placed a gloved hand to her mouth and smiled gracefully.
“You should think for yourself and fight according to your own beliefs. After all—I believe Too-ka Mimori has a plan for what is to come. He has very much taken into account your thoughts and actions in particular.”
…She’s right.
When I thought I was about to break, he had Hijiri ready for me. He knew she would work best against me… Thinking back on all the problems I’ve caused, maybe I have no right to so say this now, but… I, Sogou Ayaka…should be grateful that he’s a member of 2-C.
“That sensible streak of yours… You remind me of her a little. She was always sticking her nose into other people’s business. Oh—I’m sorry.”
“Huh?”
“In the war against Mira…” Cattlea began, her gaze slightly dropped. “I sensed what was within you, but I did nothing to intervene. I feel awful for doing so. At that time, it was difficult to determine your condition. I was scared to reach out to you. Well, that was part of it, but…I also knew it would put our combined forces at a disadvantage in that war if I tried to make contact with you. If I said the wrong thing and broke the spell of your battle frenzy… Well, such were my thoughts at the time. It was callous of me. So you see, I made a mistake of sorts, too. I am sorry.”
“No…I was so worked up back then that… You need not feel responsible for that, Cattlea-san.”
Cattlea sighed and looked up at the heavens.
“Yes… You really do remind me of her…”
She looked back to the front lines.
“But you’ll be okay now. Dance on the palm of that Lord of the Flies, and you will not fall so far again, I expect.”
“Yes. I think you’re right,” replied Ayaka. She tightened her grip on the spear in her hands. “I should be going,” she said, gazing off toward the giant eucharist that was approaching. “I’ll be back.”
She dismounted from her horse—a regular one, as she wasn’t mounted on one of her unique skill’s silver mounts yet.
Now is when I begin consuming MP. I have to repay those that have helped me and to atone. If I can, I want to eliminate every last eucharist on this battlefield.
With those feelings in her heart, Sogou Ayaka kicked hard off the ground as she launched into a charge.
I have to believe that there’s something after this—a shimmering world that waits for us.
“Silver World.”