One of the guys cocked his head to the side. “Huh? Can’t we only do that in the other world?”
“We might as well try. Since the teachers are all in the staff room, we’ve gotta do all we can by ourselves. Let’s see… Status!”
C’mon, Aoyama. God told you to think it, not say it, you poser.
A translucent card appeared in front of him.
“Whoa!” He grabbed it and started reading it over. “He’s right. It’s like I’m some game character. Everyone, check your own Stats!”
Well, at least someone’s taking charge.
I concentrated for a moment and watched as my own Status card popped up.
Wait, what the hell? What does it mean, “technically” human?! Am I really that ugly?! Why did they need to put me down as a “creepy” male?! Wasn’t just “male” good enough for me?! And those Stats—how is my Charisma not even a number? My Luck’s zero too!
Wait, and why are all my clothes dirty?! They’d better not be dirty just because I’m wearing them! Damn, I think I might cry. How come even my own Stats treat me like shit?! Really, my job’s “Filth of Society”?! I’m a student! That’s a job, honest! Man, I’m not going to last a second in a fight. So what, I’m supposed to just die?!
I stopped to take a breath. I’d never had to retort to so many things at once before.
As I went through five full stages of grief over my Stats, I could hear my classmates’ voices all around me.
“Hey, look, I’m a Swordswoman!”
“Pfft, lame. I’m a Sage!”
“Check it out; all my Stats are at a hundred already!”
“Really? I’m hundreds across the board too.”
Wait, what?! That would be like a hundred times my Stats!
I could feel a dark lump form in my giant gut.
Is this what it’s like to live in a class-based society? Thanks, I hate it.
“Alright, looks like everyone’s seen their Stats,” Aoyama called out with a nod. “Let’s form groups then. We’re almost out of time.”
He looked up at the clock, and I followed his gaze. It was still ticking away, fortunately, but it looked like fifty minutes had already passed since the end of the announcement.
“There shouldn’t be any maximum group size, or at least that’s what that voice implied. We’d better go as big as we can then. If only we knew how to form groups…” As he spoke, another translucent card appeared in the air in front of him. “Oh, is this the group-making function? It looks like all we need is our group members’ names. Alright, we’ll go around and say our names one by one, and everyone just needs to write them down.”
Everyone got up to cluster around Aoyama, and one by one, they started writing down each others’ names. At this rate, I’d get left out. I didn’t want to be the first to die at least.
I waited until everyone else was done to call out to Aoyama.
“Hey, uh… put my name in too!”
Aoyama shot me a frigid look. “Huh? Don’t tell me what to do, Porko.”
“Huh?”
“Who the hell’d wanna write your name?”
“B-but at this rate, I won’t—”
“What, afraid of being alone? Like anyone’d wanna party up with a pig like you. Like, seriously, stay over there. Ugh, I can smell you from here.”
I was struck speechless.
They’re still bullying me when it’s life or death?!
I looked to the others for help, but they all just shot me dirty looks, and a few of them were smirking. Not a soul was on my side.
Dammit, this is some rotten luck. Well, duh. I guess my Luck is zero.
After a long moment, though, one of the guys—Ooki—burst out laughing.
“Hahahaha! Oh, crap, that’s a riot! I’m gonna die!”
They looked at him as if he were nuts. “Dude, what’s your problem?”
He jabbed a finger at me. “Just look at Porko’s Stats! Damn, they’re somethin’!”
Wait, how?! Aren’t I the only person who can see my Stats?
Ooki sneered as though he could read my mind.
“Guess what, shithole? I tried out that Analysis Skill just like that announcer freak said. And man, you’re special … hahahaha!”
Analysis?! Really?!
The students around him gave him a doubting look, but a moment after they turned to face me, they also burst out laughing.
“How do you even get Stats that shitty?!”
“Damn, that’s a lotta ones…”
“Oh, is he screwed. He’s dead meat!”
They started pointing and laughing like children.
“More like dead weight! Who’d let a guy like him join their party?!”
“Ew… And I thought he was gross before.”
“Oof. How’s it feel to be ‘Filth of Society’?”
Just to be sure, I decided to use Analysis on Aoyama, but as soon as I did, I regretted it.
>The difference between your Stats and the target’s is too great to be revealed via Analysis.
All I could see was his name. Everything else was blurred out.
How are they all this much stronger than me at level 1? I was trash by this world’s standards, and it looked like getting sent to a new world would do jack shit to help me.
I nearly blacked out, but my classmates’ insults only became more intense.
“Just go screw yourself, uggo.”
“Like, seriously. What’d I do to deserve being in a class with you?”
“Hey guys, we can’t really pick on him here, but he’s fair game in the new world, ain’t he?”
“God, just die already.”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
“Die!”
Okay, okay, I get it! Seriously, how do you expect me to respond to that?! “Sure thing, will do, mates”? Like hell I’d do that! Death’s scary!
I gave up on getting through to them at all. I couldn’t bring myself to care anymore. So what if I couldn’t join their group? They’d probably just bully me more anyways. That’s it; find the silver lining, Seiichi. Yep.
“Ew, is he actually smiling?”
“Hah, what a sicko!”
How about you just give it a rest?! Get a hobby or something!
At that moment, though, the intercom turned on again. Our hour was up.
“Well, it looks like you’ve formed your groups … except for one of you, I suppose.”
Wait, do they mean me? They mean me, don’t they?!
“I see you’re quarrelling even when your lives depend on it. I should’ve expected as much from humans. You never change, but I’m getting sidelined. I have an apology to make to you all.”
Apology? I don’t like the sound of that.
“Remember how I told you I’d send any groups to safe areas? About that—it seems one of the countries in your new world is performing a hero-summoning ritual.”
Hero-summoning?
“As such, all your groups will be sent right there. I’m afraid they’ve completely hijacked my own transportation magic … though one of you will fall through, it seems.”
So they all get summoned as heroes to some ritzy castle, and I get dropped someplace dangerous on my own?!
“It seems that your destination world has a Demon King in it now, so the world will be a tad more dangerous than usual. You’ll probably be thrown straight into some fight or another. Since your time will be at a premium, I’ll be putting a book into your Item Boxes that explains the basics of your new world. Aside from that, however, you’re on your own. I’ve done all I can.”
Seriously?! I thought God was supposed to be all-powerful! And my classmates are all going to be fighting right off the bat? I’m almost glad I’m not getting summoned with them. Nope, scratch that. I don’t wanna die alone.
“Oops, looks like the ritual is starting.” Glowing circles of light formed at the feet of all my classmates. “Sorry about this, really. Good luck in your new world. I’ll be praying for your survival.”
With that, they all faded away into glittering motes of light. A few of them stopped to shoot me dirty sneers as they went. That was awfully grown up of them.
I found myself alone in the room.
A long moment of silence passed.
Wait, what about me?! I’m supposed to be going somewhere, right?!
“Ahaha, relax,” came the voice over the intercom. “I’ll send you on your way in a moment. I’m afraid I don’t know where you’ll be headed though. I set the magic to ‘random’.”
“What?”
“If you’re lucky, you’ll get sent to a nice town or something. If you’re not … well, enough said.”
“Seriously?!”
What a time to have a Luck of zero. I already know how this is going to play out.
The voice wasn’t finished, however. “I’ll admit, though, I’m almost impressed you alone were left out. Even the teachers are heading off to be heroes. How about I give you one last Skill to make up for it then?”
“Really?!”
“Let’s see what I’ve got. Oh, this is a nice one. I think I’ll give you Perfect Loot.”
“Perfect Loot?”
Wow. That’s got one hell of a ring to it.
“Basically, whenever you slay a monster, you’ll be able to take everything it possesses. Just like Analysis, it’s perfectly risk-free. Oh, and like other Skills, it doesn’t consume Mana, either. Feel free to try it out when you arrive in your new home world.”
“Okay…”
“Whoops, and there goes the ritual! Looks like your time has come.”
I looked down to see that my body was covered in glittering motes of light.
“Good luck in your new world now.”
Bit by bit, I started fading from the face of the earth.
Finally, it was time for my story to start!
Or something like that. Forget I said anything.