Chapter 166

“That’s all five members! They’re the hottest singles in town over in Disboard, and we’re gonna watch them duke it out for love!! Whaddaya think of that lineup?! Don’t worry, I’ll give you a moment to reattach your mandibles!” …Perhaps her viewers’ jaws were literally dropping. It felt like Sora and crew were a part of a low-budget dating sim—like they were part of the title sequence for one. They each had their own theme songs and dumb catchphrases. Foeniculum, however, showed no sign of even acknowledging the five. She continued, her spunky attitude unabated. “You don’t need me to tell you that this space lacks both food and water!! Provisions for our five guests will be paid for by tips from our viewers—with the exception of the Flügel and the Ex Machina, the other three won’t last longer than three days without water! You wouldn’t want your favorite member to die now, would you?! Who could live with that?! So you better send in your money if you want ’em to survive! ” She was simultaneously begging and threatening her viewers for money like some desperate Sn*pchat influencer. “Now then!! That brings us to the end of our launch for today! ” And finally: “The stream will start at eight PM every night! Share it with your friends!! But don’t send them clips!! Link them to our page!! I’ll see ya tomorrow! Bye-byyye! ” She finished the stream without giving Sora and the others a chance to speak. The so-called launch video came to an end. The bubbles the group was trapped in popped. But they were left even more speechless with what followed. The five of them watched in silence as: “Heh-heh-heh… Look at all these new viewers! I knew having guests on would be the quickest way to get the cash rolling in! Ha-ha!! All those losers in the comments can suck it!! LMFAOOOO!!” Barely a moment later, Foeniculum already had her next cigar in hand and was doubled over, cackling. Speechless as he was, Sora nonetheless had an inkling that her stream might still be live, prompting him to quietly alert her: “…Are you sure…the mic and camera are off?” “Kyaaaan! Thanks again, everybody, as always! ” Foeniculum chucked her cigar to the side with supersonic speed as she addressed her viewers. Then, after properly checking to make sure the camera was indeed off this time: “…Holy shit… They’re totally dragging me in the comments… Still, I guess some drama oughtta bring more attention to the stream.” She pretended to brush it off, despite the visible sheen of cold sweat on her face. Sora rubbed his temples and asked: “Uh… How about we go over the rules again, then… So what are we doing?” “Hmm? Did you not watch the video I just made?” Foeniculum wondered whether she’d forgotten to explain something, then went on. “Use your…what were they called again? Smartphones? Tablets? Whatever they are, you can use those devices to check how many tips you’ve received.” Sora and Shiro followed her directions and took out their smart devices. And there it was: a new icon they’d never seen before. They tapped the icon and saw a number: 15,000. “Looks like you already have a patron! You can use that money to buy goods. Either you become a couple with one of your fellow guests, or you save up enough money to buy a key. That pretty much sums it up.” Sounds easy, right? Sora took a deep breath and replied: “……Right. There’s just one more important detail I’d like to confirm.” It was a simple game indeed, but there was still an overarching problem. Depending on the answer to his question, the game would be either heaven or hell. And his question was: “There are five of us—so I wanna ask you: Is it possible for one of us to pair up with you?” “The heck kinda question is that? Hell no. You stupid or something?” Sora was quite serious, but Foeniculum scoffed at him. “I’m the host, duh. It’s your job to make me a popular streamer! I need you to make my viewers happy by falling in love on the show so we can reap all the tips!! I’m seriously hoping you kids’ll knock this outta the park, y’know. This’ll kick up my channel to the top in no time! Anyway, there’s a lot I gotta do, so I’ll be off! Toodles!!” The Fairy rattled off a brief spiel before disappearing with a little poof. ………, The group stood there in awe for a good five minutes. And then—Sora looked at the ever-precarious situation before turning his gaze up to the heavens with a smile. Ah… So this game will end with two couples—and a single person buying their way out with a key. That removed the need to leave someone behind—something Sora would’ve never agreed to anyway. But there was still an issue: “…Okay… Let’s get, back to…what we were…talking about…” “Affirmative: We’ll be playing for Master’s love. I challenge you all. Come at me.” “It’s an incredible honor to challenge Lord Shiro to an actual match—now, let’s get started.” “What?! So it all comes back to this?! I’m pretty sure there are other ways to approach the situation at hand!!” The girls went back to seeing each other as enemies. The game that would result in Sora’s friends hating him forever was about to start. He watched as the tension ratcheted up before… That’s right: “NOOO!! I’m just gonna end up alone again like always!!! Somebody get me outta here!” It was just as he expected: Two girl-on-girl couples would form. And Sora would leave alone. Knowing this was how the game would end, a sobbing Sora cried out in grief…