Chapter 144

ONE-TURN END Elkia Royal Castle: the throne room. It had been a quick ten days since it was warped into a concert venue. But now it was as if it had all been a dream—its former state had been restored as good as new. The throne was back to what, according to Steph, was its proper position, steeped in fine tradition. Also in their proper positions— “Hmm… You think the turn’s about over yet?” “…Soon… Maybe…three more, days…?” —fiddling with their tablet, sat the king and queen of Elkia, Sora and Shiro, who both groaned. …The turn should be wrapping up… The other players should be about done. They thought back to the turn they’d skipped, which could hardly be called a break… They’d had nothing to do. They’d dedicated the turn to producing Holou. And yet, things got even crazier than expected due to an astonishing guest: Ex Machina. But as soon as the game had ended…Ex Machina had gone away somewhere without a word. Of course. It wasn’t as if they’d made them pledge to be their allies. They’d made them pledge to abandon their love, and reproduce so they would not perish. That was all. They could go where they wanted. They could come back as an enemy if they wanted. They were free. —But that’s kinda cool, too. Sora and Shiro smiled to themselves. If Ex Machina were to come back of their own will and challenge “ ” properly…they’d welcome them. Still, they were left here with fine fruits of Ex Machina’s power. “…Soraaa… Shirooo… The merch is about to sell out…” A tired-looking freight girl arrived in the throne room— Ahem. Steph in working clothes. Sora looked her in the eye as he responded promptly. “Heh, fear not. The eighteenth printing should be here soon! Sell those suckers!” That’s right—Holou’s show had been such a legendary success, merch was flying off the shelves. Though it did have to be said— “…All we have are block prints and books of block prints of Holou… Can we not do more?” Steph lamented. Elkia didn’t currently have the technology to create anything impressive. In fact, they’d gone to rather unreasonable lengths just to make these pinups and albums. Specifically, they’d photographed Holou with their phones, had Jibril make blocks with magic, and began mass-producing the printed prototypes they’d had the Academy research, which artists then colored… In other words, this shit was the culmination of otherworldly technology, magic, and abuse of state power. Steph was appalled by this senseless commercialization of untold artifice and labor, but even so, she had to wonder: “I would love to hear Holou’s songs more… Won’t you sell them?” Yes… Steph, who had fallen deeply for Holou’s song, wanted—rather, everyone wanted more than anything else—to hear her sing again. Elkia was already gaga over the picture albums. Not that Elkia had audio recording technology or media. But surely Jibril could help out the Kingdom of Elkia— “Mmm… You think so, huh? Everyone thinks so. I think so.” Surely the Commonwealth of Elkia could do it. Sora nodded to Steph’s suggestion. “Of course we’ll sell them. If just for the chance to crush the idol agencies of the Eastern Union. ” “…P-pardon…?” Sora’s inordinately evil smile made Steph take a step back, but he and Shiro stood from the throne and raved on. “The Shrine Maiden attended the performance. Surely you don’t think that was by chance?” “…We invited, lots of big shots, from the Eastern Union… Especially…those involved…with the idol industry…” “? For what purpose?” Steph asked the siblings as they wandered aimlessly. And then… “Heh, heh-heh-heh, don’t you see? Very well—we shall tell you!” Sora and Shiro clicked their heels and revealed their scheme—! “Holou’s concert drew an audience of thousands. But! Her reputation has spread throughout the Commonwealth!!” “…Words, spread like lightning… Picture albums…sell like hotcakes…!” “But guess what! No one’s got the video or audio! I mean, we don’t know how to manufacture them!” No true business professional would miss a chance to grab some cash. So—! “All the businesses in Eastern Union who refused to give us equipment will come pounding on the door to pick up the audio!” “Oh! So then you’ll make good with those who—” “But we’ll say no!! Buzz off! Get lost! We’ll humbly decline and slam the door in their faces—!!” “…We’ll tell them, come back yesterday…and belly laugh…and sneer…and point!” Steph thought she had it figured out, until Sora and Shiro filled the castle with their screams of how wrong she was. Sora carried on theatrically, frivolously, leaving Steph in a daze. “Whaaat? I mean, like, think about it, trying to suck up to the big guys; Bl4nk Productions is, like, sooo out of their league! You guys totally shafted Holou, and now she’s ours! And then when you see she’s hit the big time, you act all nice and stuff? Oh my God!! That’s suuuper bitchy! You’re, like, sooo pathetic, y’know?? ” Nothing could be more pathetic than Sora’s rendition of a stereotypical teen’s vernacular. Shiro and Steph had the impulse to inform him of this, but instead they waited for his conclusion. He sat back down on the throne, crossed his legs, and arrogantly divulged his conclusion. “I mean…if you signed an exclusivity contract with Bl4nk Productions, we might consider it.” “…But would anyone really accept such conditions?” No matter how much revenue it might rake in, it couldn’t be worth cutting off all their other contracts just for Holou, Steph argued, but Sora declared: “Sure they will. ’Cos Bl4nk Productions is gonna be the biggest idol agency in the Commonwealth.” The song of the Sirens, the craft of the Elves, the technology of another world: a whole new kind of music! Under the powerful hand of “ ”, the unifiers of the races and Holou’s producers!! At least some of the industry big shots they invited would have to think this. And frankly, they only cared about some of them. That is to say—! O producers in whose souls ambition reigns supreme! If you be a producer whose soul burns to raise your idols to greater heights— —you must switch your allegiance to Bl4nk Productions!! “Assemble, comrades, under the banner of Bl4nk Productions, with your animal-girls!!” Sora looked to the sky, opened his arms, and called out for his compatriots, the heroes, to join him. “…All the Eastern Union’s…idols…suits…and producers…are ours…!” And with a huff, Shiro took her place—on his lap—to hammer the point home. They were going to gobble up the Eastern Union’s agencies. Their talent. Their market. They were going to devour it all. Tariffs? Cancel that shit! Tax breaks, special exemptions up the wazoo! You’ll see what happens when you cross Bl4nk Productions. Your body will remember the price you paid for opposing the government! “…Your deviousness is so reliable, it makes my head hurt…” “But!! That is only the beginning…!” Sora boldly ignored Steph to lay out his grand aspiration, his endless end! “Before long, we shall install relay devices not only throughout Elkia and Eastern Union, but throughout the entire Commonwealth!!” Like TV or radio. They’d make Holou’s song boom over every realm! “Even the assembled technology of the Commonwealth of Elkia is not yet able to achieve this… But—” Sora’s eyes burned with the ambition to make it happen— “Ohhh! Ahhh… Dear one… Why are you so cold…?” —and suddenly reflected an unpleasant piece of junk that appeared before him, nose to nose, finger lifting Sora’s chin, teeth sparkling. “You desire such a device… Heh, such a challenge is nothing before my power of love.” “Don’t we have any other power source?! Hey, why are you even still here?!” —I mentioned that Ex Machina had gone somewhere. Sorry, I lied. Most regrettably, there was one unit still here, for some reason, and it was Einzig. But then…when you thought about it, it would be a waste for Ex Machina to leave. After all, their power was enough to take care of everything, for they were the perfect stage equipment. In fact, there had been plans to bring them properly into the Commonwealth fold in the future— “Why? Hmm… What is there to wonder about a man desiring to stay by the side of the one he loves?!” “How many times do I have to tell you, I’m—not—your—guy! I thought I bound you by the Covenants to abandon—” “No. I understand now. You are not the Spieler… You are Sora.” Einzig smiled as if sentimentally accepting everything. “Set your mind at ease. For my love is pure and proper—I am in love with you!!” “That does not put my mind at ease!” —Why? Why did it have to be him? The trope was that the girls were still there. At the very least, that wasn’t the kind of line you’d hear from a guy!! Sora cursed this world that betrayed every sacred expectation geek culture had given him. “…I must apologize. I will impose on you but one last time, of reluctance to part. It would honor me if you could overlook it.” Einzig’s tone had turned wistful. Yet, he concluded with an even brighter smile. “…I shall follow the other units—back to our base.” Turning on his heel, Einzig went on with a brisk voice. “Reproduction must now be my top priority…to produce the new Einzig, who will succeed this one who has long since passed his limits. Therefore, this is the time to set your mind at ease…for this will surely be our last meeting.” “……” Einzig walked off with his back to them. “It is true… My dearest, you are not the Spieler. But—” Still, he spoke loud and clear. “You are the Nachfolger. And we will never go back on our word again.” —We have come to assist you. We are your allies. The weight of his words brought to mind what he told them when they first met. “Ex Machina will always be your ally. When you rise again to topple the world, we shall run to your aid,” Einzig declared, still walking. “…It might not be I. But whoever we are, we will bring you victory.” Yes: “Next time. This time, we will not go back on our word.” “…We can’t make you wait that long.” The machine that had chased one hope 5,982 years past the end of his service life now departed without turning. No—the man, who now meant to say good-bye. “You hung in there for 5,982 years. Just hang in a little longer… See ya.” “…Bye-bye… Let’s…play again…sometime, ’kay…?” Still, their amiable words did not turn him back. Gallant and attractive, the only reply was a slight chuckle. Sora decided not to notice the trace of tears… …… “Man, like, those guys were pretty hardcore. I mean, they were annoying and awkward, but…” As Einzig’s form receded from view, Sora thought back on the machines with hearts and came to a conclusion. They’d embraced paradox and become like people—just as awkward. —But perhaps more pure. They had persisted in an unfulfilled love for one they knew was gone…for thousands of years. “…I guess I can see how the epic gamer who ended the war could’ve fallen in love with them.” Sora so candidly summed things up, and Shiro and Steph chuckled and nodded softly— —when. “Hypothesis: If love specified for abandonment in previous game limited to Spieler…” Gah! A monotone voice echoed from behind the throne, practically making everyone scream. “Corollary: …Then Master intended loophole to allow love of this unit for Master. Inescapable conclusion.” That optical camouflage shit again? The maid robot materialized, her violet hair and skirt fluttering. Yes…it was the heretic of the heathens, Emir-Eins, carefully aiming her finger-gun at Sora’s heart. “Determination and Confirmation: Master is in love with this unit. Bang.” Her deadpan wink worked surprisingly well as she expressed the firing of hearts or something from her finger. But Sora, the word miss rising from his head as the poorly aimed shot passed him by, replied: “Emir-Eins? Huh? You’re here, too?!” “Acknowledgment: Always.” “Even Einzig left! What are you doing here?!” “Rejoinder: This unit is Master’s wife.” “I’m—not—your—guy. How many times do we have to go through this? Did you delete and rewrite your memory again?!” As Sora clutched his head and groaned at her hopeless persistence, she grew flustered— No. “Panic: Misunderstanding inferred. Previous statement was not fact, but rather, the desire of this unit.” “Oh, so you do get it…” Expressing panic only verbally, Emir-Eins corrected herself placidly. “Summary: Ex Machina lost. Unit re…rejected by Master… Fatal misunderstanding… Chassis temperature elevated: Shame detected. Erasing memory—failed. Already disconnected; how… Hilfe.” Despite her calm tone, the contents of her summary grew more and more distraught, to the point that smoke began to rise from her. After finally begging for help, she dropped her head limp like a puppet with a broken string, like a person tortured by the recollection of her humiliating past—but she didn’t leave Sora and Shiro time to worry. “Defiance: Still. This world provides option ‘try again.’ So. Therefore. This unit.” She raised her head again and looked straight at Sora with those glass eyes. While her hands shook, clenched together at her chest—did she notice? “Wish: Again. This unit will express feelings to Master. Attempt this time…… Okay?” Emir-Eins was begging, pleading for a rematch. As a gamer, how could he shut her down? “…Ah, fine. But just one more time. And if you still get pwnd, let’s play a different game.” To begin with, she’d just thought he was some other guy and fallen for him as an extension of that. If they were going to play again, Sora wanted her to play them, he implied. Emir-Eins plucked up her skirt, took a deep curtsy, and hummed: “Lösen—Org. n—Checkmartyr—” Then she took a deep breath. No—Ex Machinas don’t need to breathe. In that case…it looked to Sora as if she was steeling herself, shaking off her uncertainty and unease. Then, as had happened so many times before, everything around them was rewritten, and everyone braced themselves. —However. “Hesitation: Master… No. Contingency judged to require name correction—” Emir-Eins just stepped, stepped toward him hesitantly. Nothing, not the scenery, not the time, nothing had changed. Not her appearance, not her voice, and not her dress—as she approached him. Not the Spieler. Not her Master. Him. “Identification: Unique and singular target, name: Sora…” Yes—she called his name. She gingerly extended her trembling hands toward his torso and hesitantly squeezed as she buried her face in his chest. Rubbing it this way and that…as if to feel his heartbeat with every fiber of her being— —she said only this: “—Confession: This unit loves Sora.” …… …………Uh. This was not good. Sora’s arms almost reflexively hugged her back, but he just managed to stop them. He applied his gaping, cracked diamond of reason as he looked upon the transcender who had at last reached truth. Truth. Yes. Like Holou. You could write out the most eloquent poetry of love in the finest calligraphy; you could present a thousand bouquets in front of a full orchestra. You could decorate your words with the most perfect grasp of preferences, conditions, and tastes…and still. —They could never compare to this inexpert, artless, and desperately brief outpouring of desire from a single girl. They could never compare—to this truth— The self-evident truth, that is, that this shit was like a hammer upon the diamond rationalization of his pathetic virginity that threatened to smash it to pieces—!! Damn…he’d never had anyone straight-up tell him they liked him before… Sora imprinted on her and was about to say, “I’ve always loved you, too”— “Reiteration: This unit loves Sora. This unit is in love with Sora…” —when his diamond was saved from certain destruction—only to be struck again—that is… “Effervescence: This unit loves you. This unit loves you. This unit loves Master. This unit loves Sora. This unit loves you. This unit loves everything about you. This unit loves the way you are. This unit loves your eyes, your thoughts. This unit proposes hypothesis that unit wishes to be one with Master. This unit is capable of fusion by neutralization of spiritual boundaries—this unit is amazing. This unit congratulates self. Request to Zeichner. Oh. Unit was disconnected—” “D00d, d00d, d00d, you’re freaking me out— Shit, you’re hot! Ow, I mean, literally, you’re literally burning me!” His diamond was struck by a machine that was clearly out of control. It was enough to make him get those cracks in his reason patched up as he cried out. At length, his shriek managed to return Emir-Eins to her senses, if we are to judge from her gasp— “Examination: Not yet able to control these feelings. Unfortunate accident. No one is at fault.” She backed off and frantically collected herself—or rather. “Correction: Master responsible for being warm. Master should think long and hard. However, unit delighted. Yay.” “D00d, you actually haven’t changed at all, have you?! You’re just as married-to-me-in-your-head as you were when we first met!!” The maid robot showed a perfect example of how to pass the blame, at which Sora squealed. “Negative acknowledgment: This unit has not won. Yet. But this unit will try again. Indefinitely. This unit will do her best.” They’d play a different game if he pwnd her… But…he hadn’t pwnd her. Emir-Eins made that clear—with a tiny, tiny smile. At which, abruptly, a murderous aura rose from beside Sora. “…Where…did you learn…that, tactic…?!” Shiro growled like a wild beast faced with her natural enemy, her red eyes burning. “…Brother, didn’t have this…shoujo manga crap…in his porn…!!” Sora wasn’t sure what was making Shiro so mad. But come to think of it, sure… Ex Machina had used his porn as a guide to approach him. He himself didn’t have a complete grasp of all the scenarios and content that had been in his collection. But if Shiro, with her photographic memory, said he didn’t, then…presumably he didn’t. Though one could not but shed a small tear at the fact that his little sister had memorized his porn. “Reply: For this trial, unit sampled advice of woman…” “…Hnguh? Uh, m-me?” Since no one really cared about Sora’s tears, Emir-Eins proceeded to point out the source of her information. Then something seemed to occur to her. She must have searched her memory and found no entry for Steph’s real name.