“It’s already past ten. We should wrap things up for tonight, Alice.” As Ichika announced the end of her lesson, Iris fell silent, seeming strangely anxious. “Alice? You should probably head back to your room.”
“Yeah... I guess...”
“We’ve got a really, really terrifying RA here. If she catches you, she’ll put you through—”
“Oh, really? Tell me more about this terrifying RA.” Ichika slowly turned his head toward the sudden new participant in the conversation— Chifuyu, her arms crossed, wearing a sweatsuit. “Orimura.”
“Y-Yes!”
“Just how many girls are you planning on luring back to your room this year, anyway? And a princess this time? Shameful.”
A shiver went down his spine. He didn’t have the nerve to remind her that he had rarely had any say in the matter.
“I-I’m not that kind of girl!” Iris glared at Chifuyu, some sort of determination obvious in her gaze.
“Right. Whatever. De Luxembourg, you can sleep here tonight.”
“Eh?!”
“Really?!”
It was hard to say whether Iris or Ichika was more surprised.
“Don’t get me wrong. I said sleep. Not anything else.” With that said, Chifuyu departed, leaving the two to take in what was happening.
“Um...” Ichika was the first to speak, as Iris’s nervousness had only increased.
“Did you bring pajamas?” She shook her head from side to side. Thinking for a moment, he pulled out a freshly-cleaned shirt. “I guess you can wear this, then. You okay with that?”
“Yeah...”
Staying overnight in a boy’s room. Even sleeping in one of his shirts. It was just too much for her.
“I’ve got a disposable toothbrush you can use. How about lotion and stuff? Do you want to go borrow some?”
“No, one night will be fine. I’m still young.”
Ichika wasn’t quite sure how to make sense out of that, but nodded along anyway. “Okay, then. I’ll wait in the hall while you change.”
As a strange sense of déjà vu washed over him, Iris spoke up almost insistently, “No, it’s fine! You can stay right there!”
“Huh?”
“You helped me change before, right? So it’s fine!”
Ichika stared at her, trying to remember, and as he did her face flushed red as she began to yell, “But turn around at least! Are you an idiot?!”
“Oh, uh, sorry.” Turning to face the wall, he heard her clothes slide off. He hadn’t really thought through the implications before, but he was definitely thinking about them now. “Um...”
“You can turn back around.”
As he did, he caught just a glimpse of her white panties below his spare shirt.
“You fool!” Nervously, she tugged the shirt’s hem down. Ichika couldn’t help but smile at how adorable the reaction was.
“What?! What are you laughing about?!”
“Honestly, you’re a lot cuter doing that than when you’re acting like a princess,” he said.
“C-Cute?!” Iris stumbled over her words, not quite able to accept it but still happy to hear it.
“Anyway, let’s get some sleep. You can use the bed by the window.”
“Okay.”
As they each got into bed, the lights turned out. But then, after lying silently for a while, Iris worked up her nerve and spoke up, “I... I want to sleep together...”
“Whaa?” Ichika couldn’t imagine that ending well, but the idea of having a spoiled little sister like her was starting to take over his decision making. “Okay, but behave.”
“Okay!”
Through the darkness, Iris made her way to his bed. As she slipped under the covers, his broad shoulders, his body, head, and the sound of his breath all made her heart pound.
“Oh my... Oh my, oh my...”
“Mm?”
“Um... Ichika... I feel so lonely with you facing away from me...”
She really did sound so lonely that Ichika felt like he had no choice but to turn around and wrap his arms around her. “Like this?”
“Ahh...!” Iris nodded nervously as she blushed bright red, and in response, Ichika patted her head. “You’re treating me like a little kid...”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“Hmph...”
Iris must have been exhausted from studying, as it didn’t take her long to fall asleep. Sighing, Ichika patted her head again.
“Good night, Alice.”
Soon after, he fell asleep as well.
✦ ✦ ✦
Iris yawned blearily, and then her eyes snapped wide open. Under the blankets, Ichika’s arms were still around her. She pinched herself to see if it was just a dream, and the pain was real. What’s going on? Why is Ichika... What on earth happened?!
She still hadn’t woken up enough to remember the night before. Why was Ichika sharing a bed with her? Where was she? Her pulse raced at the warmth of Ichika’s body next to her. She was close enough to feel him breathe.
“Ahhh...” Unsure of what to do, she curled up, her face crimson. But moments of bliss like this never last long.
“Good morning, Alice. I came to— What?!” Djibril stepped into the room, only to find two people in one bed. It was too much for someone with so little experience with men to take, and she snapped. “Orimura Ichika! You, you—!”
Tearing the covers off, she delivered a forceful kick to Ichika.
“Grrrrrah!” He rolled to the wall, making a noise like an accidentally-stepped-on cat.
“Death, death to you! I’ll take your head myself!” Djibril unsheathed her sword, the standby mode of her IS. The Imperial Knight had once been a bracelet in standby mode, but upon attaining Second Shift a year before had changed form into a blade. And now that blade thrust toward Ichika.
“W-W-W-Wait!” Iris cried out.
“Alice! Why stop me?! After what this man has done to you...”
“I-I forgive him!” Her face was red as she almost yelled.
“...What?” Djibril and Ichika’s heads both slowly turned toward her.
“We-We’re like that now! Even Orimura Chifuyu approved!”
“...Huh?” Djibril was as stunned as Ichika was. Not to mention the girls from neighboring rooms who had turned out to see what the commotion was.
“I, I’m going to marry Ichika!” The world faded to white around Djibril. Meanwhile, Ichika had no idea what was going on. But the other girls sure did.
“Has Orimura’s time finally come?!”
“Is this the end of the Orimura harem?!”
“No! Long live the Orimura Kingdom!”
“Long live our fatherland!”
If he had thought he was confused before, this put him on a whole other level. And then, the other cadets overheard. Thus began Ichika’s descent into hell.
✦ ✦ ✦
The scene: the largest table in the dining hall at breakfast. Ichika was strapped to a guillotine as the cadets conducted a witch trial. (There were centuries of precedent for calling it a witch trial even if the accused was a man. Which didn’t make a huge amount of sense, really, but who are we to argue?)
“My neck hurts...” Ichika exclaimed bluntly.
“Is that all you have to say for yourself?!” Houki unsheathed her katana. One way or the other, his goose was cooked.
“What is the meaning of this, Ichika?! Explain yourself!” Cecilia was beside herself with rage, charging her sniper rifle even as she spoke.
“I thought we settled this already!” Ling gave Ichika a swift kick to the rear. With the leg parts of her IS opened, it hurt. A lot.
“So, Ichika, would you rather the pile bunker or the shotgun? I’ll let you pick.” Charlotte was grinning from ear to ear even as she hefted a weapon in each hand.
“I’ve heard a faithless bride is a groom’s failure, but I wasn’t expecting you to prove it.” Laura pressed the muzzle of her meter Mauser to his temple, her face contorted with stress.
“Time to die, Ichika...” Kanzashi sawed at the guillotine’s rope, her expression terrifyingly blank.
“I’m disappointed in you, Ichika. And is it just me or is it getting hot in here?” Tatenashi gritted her teeth as she spread Mysterious Lady’s nanomachines, veins bulging on her forehead.