As the tears flowed, my heart gradually calmed.
Looking around, I saw Kanami the Founder standing a short distance away, breathing heavily, his shoulders rising and falling, and Rouge, her eyes teary, standing beside him. I hadn’t noticed Rouge’s presence until the very last moment of the duel. I was the Thief of Wood’s Essence, possessing the ability to control and understand Viaysia Castle. Yet, I’d failed to notice her until the very last moment.
I understood what that meant. I could see Rouge worrying about me, yet I’d chosen not to see it. It was the same as a thousand years ago—knowing all along, yet choosing to pretend I didn’t. Only after it was over had I realized I’d fought the duel while turning away from so many things. Because I kept doing things like that, I always lost sight of what was important at the crucial moment.
Perhaps because I’d suffered a defeat that was undeniably mine, my heart felt strangely calm. I even had the composure to ask my opponent about my own disgraceful state. “Kanami, when did I start crying?”
He probably hadn’t expected me to speak to him, all things considered. But he answered honestly despite his surprise. “Bit by bit, starting during the fight.”
“Is that so? You’ve grown stronger, Kanami. Above all, your heart has grown stronger. It’s a world of difference from the ancient days when you’d frown at the thought of your enemy hesitating, full of regret and fighting reluctantly.” Nostalgic for the past, I praised the victor. I just felt like doing so. “You no longer waver even the slightest. It was a splendid fight.”
“Yeah. I realized I just have to do what needs to be done without hesitation. So I’m doing it step by step, one thing at a time, so I won’t have any regrets.” Kanami said this as if it were obvious, but if that were possible, not a single soul would have grieved a thousand years ago.
With a wry smile, I shook my head at the remark. “But you see, when humans are alive, that’s incredibly difficult. Ah, so being strong really is unfair... Strong people effortlessly accomplish things that weak people can’t.”
Perhaps dissatisfied with my reaction, Kanami answered, slightly irritated. “True, I think I’ve grown stronger. But I wasn’t strong from the start. I made countless mistakes, suffered countless defeats, faced countless setbacks to get here. It might sound like a cliché, but I believe true strength isn’t about never falling down. It’s about getting back up no matter how many times you fall.”
“And you expect me to buy that childish nonsense? The world is unfair. The strong never fall. They keep winning until they die. That’s just how it is. Look at us now. I can’t get back up, and you’re practically unscathed.”
My words were utterly unacceptable—I’d been defeated by overwhelming talent. Kanami himself seemed to understand that innate talent had played a role in this battle. I found myself unable to contradict that, my lips curling slightly.
Yet, with his lightning-fast thinking, he seemed to find a counterargument instantly. He addressed me, still lying on the ground, wearing a smug look. “Hey, Ide. You think Titee is strong, right? Has she never been knocked down?”
It was a question that struck at my core.
Seeing me falter at this difficult challenge, he pressed further. “True, Titee’s younger brother might have been weak, but is that true even now?”
I couldn’t answer immediately. Seeing my grim expression, he sighed with a faint smile and turned away, seeking an opening through the gap between the withered, tree-covered throne room pillars to step outside.
“Kanami, where are you going?”
“The duel is over. I’m going outside,” he answered without turning back. Unlike me, his response was immediate. “I won’t leave my only family, my sister, alone.” He meant he was going out to defeat the Sovereign Queen Lorde. “Ide, what about you?” he asked me, his enemy. His eyes as he looked at me were, for some reason, filled with trust.
“If you leave me here... After I recover, I might attack you from behind, don’t you think?” I answered.
“You wouldn’t do something like that. You’re no longer the chancellor. This duel was to prove that, wasn’t it?”
“Huh...?” I let out an uncharacteristic sound at hearing something I hadn’t considered even once in the past few days. This duel was to prove that I wasn’t the chancellor... That was giving me too much credit. I’d just been desperate to defeat Kanami the Founder out of childish jealousy and a sense of self-preservation. “What nonsense...”
Yet, when Kanami said it, a part of me almost believed it. As I looked away, he left me with these final words: “Ide, on my way here, I saw what you left behind. So I understand you.”
Even though I’d screamed that I didn’t want to be, Kanami calmly declared that he understood me as he looked down at me. Though stunned by his composure, I felt a faint tinge of nostalgia.
“Titee said it too. That within you, surely the hearts of that old man and old woman have been passed on.”
“Old man? Old woman?” When I heard those words, my mind went completely blank for a moment. I understood the words. They referred to a grandfather and grandmother. In other words, family. Family that I didn’t have but that everyone else should have. No, I didn’t have any? Was that right? Surely, I too had—
“Oh no! Not again! Professor! Pull yourself together!” Just as I was lost in thoughts of my grandparents, Rouge beside me placed a hand on my shoulder in a flustered manner and gently shook me.
Seeing that hand on my shoulder, a familiar face appeared in my mind, which should have been completely blank. Ah, yes. Their hands had also been red like this, and then—
“I’ll leave the rest to you, Rouge. It seems I was the antagonist this time...” Seeing me looking at Rouge, Kanami smiled with a look of relief. Then, he left the throne room and vanished.
“Wait, Master Kanami! Wait!” I called out frantically, but no reply came. And so, only Rouge and I were left behind in the throne room of Viaysia Castle. Without Kanami, it was truly quiet. Only the sound of our breathing could be heard.
Kanami had asked me this question, but what was I to do now? I had lost the duel that held my entire life’s meaning, and my body was now on the verge of vanishing. There wasn’t much I could do.
Even so, Kanami had looked at me with expectant eyes. With a look of trust, he’d dismissed me with only the words “I understand.” He’d said the hearts of my grandfather and grandmother lived on within me.
But no matter how deeply I dug into the past, I couldn’t recall such a family. All that came to mind were the voices of contempt from the comrades who’d sworn to defend the North together. And the image of myself, unable to do anything. It was a life where I’d never felt truly alive. It was a life spent only searching for a place to belong. In the end, it was a life where I’d found nothing. It had been painful... No, it still hurt...