“Why did you say all that stuff to Aki?”
It was late at night. So late, the sun was on the verge of rising again. We were in the Iris Room. I was still typing out my novel as I glanced over at my editor, who was in the corner sipping tea and staring at her tablet. My heart was still pounding. When Canary-san suddenly started talking about Makigai Namako in front of Aki, I was terrified he might realize it was me.
“Hmmm.” Canary-san paused and considered my question. The next second, she struck a stylish pose. “You gotta make your exit as meaningful as possible! That’s how you leave a cool impression!”
“That’s dumb.”
“Squawk! Who’s supposed to be in charge here?” Canary-san hugged her knees in a fake show of shock, tracing sad faces on the floor with a finger. “Calm down. I’m in junior high school, remember? Junior high school forever... I’m gonna be young and famous forever...”
Hold on, she wasn’t faking anything. She was genuinely hurt. I guess I learned something new about her. I didn’t realize she could be so sensitive about this kind of thing, especially since she was so accomplished.
“Y’know, I just thought Aki-kun should remember how lucky he is. He’s really found a golden goose in you.”
“Who are you calling a goose? Wanna die?”
“Whoa, whoa, it was just a figure of speech! You’re a writer, aren’t you? You’re supposed to be up to scratch with these things. Also, you seriously need to hold back on the death threats.” Canary-san took a deep breath. “Remember back when you got feathers in your brain and couldn’t write anything but chicken feed, chirp?”
“Ngh...”
“That was because of Aki-kun, right? I wasn’t about to let him get away with ruining my author, chirp!”
“You’re... You’re right.”
I couldn’t deny anything when it came to Aki. There was a time when my feelings for him were so overwhelming that they affected my work. I wrote so many trashy manuscripts without even realizing how bad they were. I couldn’t think back on them without my face bursting into flames. I wanted all of that to stay buried in the past.
“After that, I kept a close eye on this Aki.”
“What?”
“He’s far from being a pro, but he’s great at directing your writing for Koyagi.”
“Really?”
“Really really. Once I overthrow UZA Bunko’s management in five years and seize power in my talons, I’ll take control of every last bookstore in the entire world! And I’m gonna have him help me do it. Chirp.”
“What? But Aki only cares about the Alliance.”
“That’s why I’m getting him to do some thinking. What can the Alliance really offer you and its other members? And is that really the path he should take?”
“You’re trying to confuse him so he’ll come and join UZA Bunko?”
“Please, you’re making it sound way too devilish! I just think he’s got talent, so I want him to lend me a wing.” Canary-san wiggled, feigning innocence.
She wasn’t about to fool me.
“Don’t break up the Alliance. If you do, I’ll stop writing.”
“I’m so sorry! What was I thinking! I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I’ll never say anything like that again! Please forgive me!” Canary-san cried out—in her normal voice. “Look, I’m not trying to force the Alliance apart, chirp! But if Aki-kun doesn’t have a good answer for the question I asked him, it’s gonna crack by itself.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t think you’d get it even if I explained, chirp. Leading a flock like that takes a lot of work. It’s complicated stuff.”
I stayed silent.
“If Aki-kun can come up with a good answer, then the Alliance will keep going. If not, I’ll take him. How does that sound? I’m not a bad egg at all!”
“I guess that’s okay...”
“I’m doing this for you too, chirp.”
“Huh?” I blinked at Canary-san in confusion.
“I know why you chose to fly with the Alliance. There’s one very simple answer, chirp!” She raised a finger and shot me a perfect wink, a gesture she must’ve practiced millions of times. “It’s because you’re in love with Aki-kun! You know, he might even marry you if you swing it so that it’s in the Alliance’s best interests!”
I didn’t need a mirror to know how red my face was right now. I could feel how hot it was. Where did marriage come into all this?
“M-Marry me? I wouldn’t wanna do that if...if it’s all part of some scheme.”
“Really?”
“Of course not! Well...” I paused, and my voice became weaker. “I don’t think I would, anyway.”
I couldn’t deny that I was really jealous when I heard Sumire-sensei was going to be his fake fiancée. I wanted to be close to Aki, even if that proximity came from dishonest or superficial reasons.
Hold on.
Maybe I could use my second identity as Makigai Namako to my advantage. What if I revealed my identity, and said I’d only continue to write for the Alliance if Aki married me? He might seriously consider it.
Or what if I used my name as Makigai Namako to publicly disparage the 05th Floor Alliance? The Alliance would lose its reputation, be forced to fold, and Aki would be free. He could come over and work for UZA Bunko, and he’d have the time to reconsider my confession.
Wait! That’s horrible!
Aki had good reason for dedicating so much of his life to the Alliance. I couldn’t ignore those feelings for my own selfish motives, no matter how much I loved him or wanted him to notice me. Not only that, but I valued the contact I had with him via Makigai Namako and the Alliance. I didn’t want to just throw all that away!
I shook my head to clear it and turned back to the keyboard, typing as fast as I could.
“Y-You’re distracting me from work. Get out of here.”
“Sure thing, lovebird. Keep at it, yeah? I’ll catch you later, chirp!” Canary-san waved a hand at me before leaving the room.
Even after I was left alone, I failed to find my focus.