“What? Me?”
“Yeah, here. Read this.”
Masachika took the letter and briefly scanned through it…before his expression suddenly contorted in disbelief.
“What…the…?”
What was written in the letter…was exactly the kind of creepy, poem-like ramblings you would expect a stalker to write—obsessing over Alisa’s hair, skin, eyes, even her body. It was just page after page of slop about the silver maiden’s appearance. While it was supposedly praising her to the highest degree…the way it was written was truly revolting. In fact, it was so disgusting that reading it aloud would be a disservice to all those with ears. Unsurprisingly, there was no name signed at the end—just a chilling line that roughly read, “I think these clothes would look so nice on you.”
What kind of creep wrote this garbage?
Masachika grimaced in disgust, since the whole thing just reeked of “deranged fan who sends lingerie to his favorite pop star.”
“What? What’s wrong?”
“It’s, uh…”
He instinctively paused and folded the letter. It was clear why Chisaki had handed it to him first, since this wasn’t something one would want to show the person that it was meant for. Obviously, that wasn’t going to fly with Alisa, though.
Hmm…
After hesitating for a few seconds and exchanging eye contact with Chisaki, Masachika held out the letter to Alisa.
“You don’t have to force yourself to read the whole thing. You only need to read the first few lines to get the gist of it.”
“…? Okay…”
Alisa frowned and lowered her gaze to the letter, but as her eyes moved down the page, her expression gradually continued to contort with each passing sentence.
“Wh-what is this…? E-ew! Gross!”
She flung the letter away as though it were the vilest thing she had ever laid hands on, but Masachika caught it midair, then handed it back to Chisaki while looking at Alisa with concern.
“Alya, are you okay?”
“…Y-yeah, I’m fine… I just got goose bumps. That’s all.”
She frowned, rubbing her arm as a chill ran down her spine. Chisaki, meanwhile, stared at the letter with steely eyes.
“Don’t worry, Alya. We will check these gifts for fingerprints if we have to,” she declared.”
“Th-thanks.”
“Yeah, I can walk you to and from school every day if I need to, too.”
“Masachika… Th-thank you. I’m fine, though…”
“Don’t worry about me. If this really is a stalker, there’s no such thing as being too careful. I’m going to stick to you like glue, whether you like it or not.”
“Masachika…”
“Of course, we, the disciplinary committee will be here to protect you as well. We need to find who was behind this before things escalate.”
“…All right.”
The reassuring words of Alisa’s partner and Chisaki seemed to have calmed her, so she exhaled softly and faced Chisaki.
“I’m okay, now. Please continue,” she assured.
“…All right, this is the last one.”
Chisaki sent her a gaze that was both reassuring and tender, then returned to the table, picked up the last package, and opened it, revealing yet another article of clothing. This time, it appeared to be some sort of evening gown with a large open back and a daringly high slit extending from the hem, past the thigh, and all the way up to the waist.
“““…”””
Everyone was quiet. In the overwhelming silence, Chisaki quietly placed the dress on the table, picked up a bamboo sword that had been leaning against the desk, pointed it sharply at the entrance, and calmly ordered:
“Move out. Our enemy is the handicraft club.”
“““Roger!!”””
With spirited voices, all the members of the disciplinary committee—except the three protecting Masachika and Alisa—formed ranks and charged out the door in unison. Meanwhile, Masachika narrowed his unenthusiastic gaze as he watched Sayaka march out of the room with her iron fan. She’s becoming exactly like them, he mused.
Minutes later, hurried footsteps echoed down the hallway as the handicraft club members were escorted into the disciplinary committee room one by one. Perhaps from sheer habit after being disciplined so often by the committee, the female students dropped to their knees on the carpet without being told as Chisaki loomed over them, her bamboo sword striking her palm with sharp, rhythmic slaps.
“So? Do you know why you were brought here?”
But perhaps because they were regulars, the handicraft club members did not cower even during Chisaki’s intimidating interrogation.
“What?! We haven’t done anything wrong yet today!”
“This is an abuse of power! How dare you interrupt our club activities like this!”
“Yes, you’re going to let our inspiration get away before we get a chance to use it!”
Chisaki’s temple pulsed, a vein bulging visibly as she grabbed the dress from the table amid their boisterous protests.
“Uh-huh… Use it for something like this?”
She held up the dress with its daring slit, immediately provoking a reaction from the most obvious culprit.
“Oh, that’s…the present I made for Alisa Kujou.”
“Of course it was you, Pro-Slit.”
“Huh? What are you doing here?”
The female student with long black hair tied back in a ponytail, whom Masachika had dubbed Professor Side Slit, turned around. Only then did she seem to notice Masachika and Alisa standing by the wall as Masachika glared coldly back at her and growled in a voice dripping with resentment:
“We’re here because someone anonymously gave Alya a bunch of suspicious birthday gifts, and we needed the disciplinary committee to make sure there was nothing dangerous in the mix.”
“‘Suspicious’? They’re ordinary gifts.”
Immediately, one of the handicraft club members sat perfectly upright on her knees, spine straight, and addressed Chisaki with dignified resolve.
“Exactly! These are offerings to our goddess! The goddess of physiques! There is absolutely nothing shady about these gifts!”
“The goddess of physiques?”
“Do I need to spell it out for you?!”
Even in the face of the school’s formidable “Donna,” the female student showed no hesitation as she pointed directly at Alisa, making her jump.
“Her height! The size of her face! The width of her shoulders! The length of her legs! How her waist is almost comically thin compared to that chest and rear! Her perfect, tight figure! If she’s not a goddess, then what is she?!”
“So you’re the one who wrote that disgusting letter.”
“Excuse me?! ‘Disgusting’?!”
“Sit down.”
But just as the female student eagerly started to stand up, Chisaki pressed her down with the tip of her bamboo sword. Though it appeared she had merely placed the sword’s tip against her shoulder, that alone was enough to prevent the girl from standing all the way up, and after trembling for several seconds, she eventually sank back down, sitting on her knees with a frustrated expression. Incidentally, her ladylike demeanor had completely vanished—a fact no one found interesting.
“Anyway, mystery solved. All these gifts for Alya came from the handicraft club, right?”
“…Right.”
“Why didn’t you write your names?”
Immediately, the handicraft club members each averted their gazes with bashful smiles.
“Because…we’re embarrassed.”
“We’re not close friends with her either… We’re simply secret admirers…”
“I was elated simply knowing that a goddess was going to be robed in my gift…”
“If we wrote our names, it’d make it seem like we wanted something back and wanted her to know who we were, and we couldn’t do something as shameless as that…”
“It’d ruin the purity of our offerings…or something like that?”
“Why is this the only time you’re ever modest?”
As Chisaki scratched her head with an expression mixing exasperation and irritation, Masachika suddenly interjected:
“Don’t mean to interrupt, but how did the handicrafts club even know it was Alya’s birthday?”
“Hmm? Oh, we heard about it from Nonoa Miyamae when she stopped by…”
“…Oh, her?”
It wouldn’t be surprising if the information came from Nonoa, since she was invited to the birthday party and might have casually let it slip during conversation. Plus, it wouldn’t be strange for the handicrafts club—a group of passionate nutjobs—to know Nonoa, given that she modeled for her parents’ company. But just as Masachika and Alisa were beginning to feel satisfied with this explanation, Chisaki picked up the mysterious plushie.
“One more question. There’s something inside this stuffed animal. What is it?”
The female student, who appeared to be the creator of the plushie, suddenly raised her voice in a flustered manner.
“Ah… I-it’s nothing weird! It’s a button, and when you press it, it makes an animal sound!”
“What? It makes a sound?”
Chisaki once again squeezed and kneaded the plushie, searching for this surprisingly elaborate mechanism for a handmade gift. Meanwhile, Masachika and Alisa exhaled, relieved that this was all it was.
“Phew. Thank goodness it wasn’t anything dangerous, huh?”
“Yeah… I’m relieved. That was quite the commotion.”
“It was all made with good intentions, at least.”
“Yeah.”
They wore deflated smiles at the anticlimactic conclusion, their worries having been completely unfounded.
“Hmm? Oh, is this it?”
Chisaki gave what appeared to be the button a firm squeeze.
“Nnngooozoooi!”
A sudden, blood-curdling shriek tore through the disciplinary committee room—like a goat bleating that had been mechanically distorted and warped—an abhorrent, otherworldly sound that humans viscerally recoiled from as it assaulted every fiber of their being. While nearly everyone present turned to stone, as if confronted by some eldritch horror, the female creator exclaimed with gleeful excitement:
“See?! It’s so cute, right? It’s an original character that I came up with myself! I call her Nmbotta!”
“Take her to the cellar.”
“““Roger!”””
“Why…?!”
As the female student was restrained by the Sisters of the Four Seasons and escorted out of the disciplinary committee room, not a single soul tried to stop them—not even anyone in the handicraft club.
“…What’s the ‘cellar’?”
“…It’s probably better you don’t know.”
Their voices faded into the empty silence of the now calm disciplinary committee room, and thus, the Mystery Gift Incident came to a close. Incidentally, Alisa ended up taking the presents home with her as well.
“Ah, Alya. Are you, uh… Are you gonna wear that?”
“I’m not sure… Did you want it, Chisaki?”
“Huh? No? Of course not!”
“…Regardless of if I’m going to wear it or not, I guess I should take it with me, since they made it just for me…”
“O-oh… Yeah…”
“…You sure you don’t want it?”
“I don’t!!”
Alisa ended up taking the see-through negligee home as well after her strange exchange with Chisaki. However…
“I’m sorry. I don’t think I’m going to be able to take this one home…”
The mildly traumatizing Nmbotta was left behind, and the next day, it mysteriously vanished from the disciplinary committee room…yet not a single soul bothered to search for it.