Chapter 5:
Reirin Bares Her Soul
AFTER KEIGETSU and the court ladies vacated the room, a lengthy interrogation was commenced by Gyoumei, who towered menacingly over Reirin where she sat.
“You prefer to leave the bracelet on because you believe it’s the most logical way to catch the sorcerer, correct?”
“Yes, sir.”
“You are determined not to waste a moment in apprehending him.”
“Yes, sir.”
“That may require taking some risks, but you feel it’s only right to do so as long as you are the only one affected.”
“Yes, sir.”
Well, “interrogation” might not have been the most accurate descriptor, seeing as the questionee was only allowed to answer with “Yes, sir.”
“You are feeling a bit impatient. You’ve staked Shu Keigetsu’s life on the success of the operation, after all.”
“Yes, sir.”
Reirin nodded along with everything Gyoumei said, as she had been instructed. Since he had prefaced this as a lecture, she’d dreaded what he might say, but the points he’d made so far had been accurate. She took no issue with any of it.
“You think of Shu Keigetsu as a very dear friend.”
“Yes, sir. Precisely.”
“You are more than happy to put your life on the line for a loved one.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Given how much she means to you, you are devastated that she just said she hates you.”
“Ye—”
Right as Reirin was about to go with the flow and concur, she clamped her mouth shut. She couldn’t agree with this one so easily. Saying she was devastated after making her friend mad would be playing the victim, and she wasn’t hurt at all. It wasn’t the first time Keigetsu had claimed to hate her, and the Shu Maiden had already stated quite openly that she didn’t feel a strong friendship for Reirin.
Her and Keigetsu’s level of investment in their relationship was unbalanced. Reirin had known as much from the moment she saw Keigetsu surrounded by friends under the pavilion. To be wounded by such a self-evident truth would be as foolish as rolling around on a bed of nails and crying about how much it hurt.
“No, si—”
“Reirin, I believe I told you not to respond with anything but ‘Yes, sir,’” Gyoumei said flatly.
After a long silence, Reirin reluctantly changed her answer. “Yes, sir.”
“There we go. That’s better. This is an order from the crown prince, so a harrowing punishment awaits you if you disobey. I expect you to keep up the enthusiasm for nodding along.” Despite the fact that he had never once abused his power this way, Gyoumei sounded perfectly matter-of-fact. Reirin screwed her lips into a childish pout, but he refrained from admonishing her and instead pressed on with his questions. “Although you claimed to be fine, you are anything but. You’re actually quite upset, aren’t you?”
“No, I’m—”
“Have you forgotten my order?”
A very long pause. “Yes, sir.” Reirin’s face puckered like she’d taken a bite of something sour. She absolutely hated showing weakness.
“That must be hard. You put on a brave face for the court ladies, but you are actually feeling very sad.”
“No—yes, sir.”
“You’re feeling lost.”
A pause. “Yes, sir.”
“You don’t want anyone to see you being vulnerable, but it’s hard not to cry.”
Reirin pursed her lips into a thin line. She didn’t want to agree. She wasn’t even close to crying. She had managed to keep her calm and carry on as usual.
“Have you noticed, Reirin?” the crown prince said after the Maiden once again fell silent. “The statements you hesitate to agree with are your true feelings. People don’t mind nodding along with things that have no basis in reality.”
Her eyes flew wide open. “Oh!”
About time, Gyoumei thought when he saw the startled look on his fiancée’s face. At long last, he had managed to get past step one.
The conversation wouldn’t get anywhere until Reirin acknowledged that she was hurt. Gyoumei was intimately familiar with his cousin’s disposition; as far as he was concerned, she needed to see that her own palms were riddled with cuts before she could tend to someone else’s emotional wounds.
Now I can finally get on with the lecture.
As Reirin’s eyes glistened with emotion, Gyoumei said softly, “Tell me, Reirin, do you understand why Shu Keigetsu was so upset with you?”
After a lengthy silence, Reirin answered, “Yes, sir.” With less confidence, she added, “I believe so.”
“Shu Keigetsu is concerned that you keep pushing yourself too hard. Hence, last night, she rushed to Treacherous Tan Peak without a care for revealing her magic. If someone I worked that hard to save kept coming up with plans to throw her life away, I would be just as furious. You ought to be more receptive to her feelings,” Gyoumei said firmly. “Why do you insist on rejecting such a passionate display of friendship?”
Reirin snapped her head up. “I have done no such thing!” Her expression was even more earnest than Gyoumei had expected. “It was not my intention to reject her. I understand that Lady Keigetsu braved great danger to come to my rescue, and I’m deeply grateful for it. That is precisely why I’m so desperate to return the favor. I wish to repay her as soon as possible. All I want is for her to be happy.”
The words sounded genuine. At the very least, the girl herself clearly believed them to be true.
The problem runs deeper than I thought.
There was more to this than Reirin being obtuse. Upon intuiting as much, Gyoumei glanced around the room, his gaze landing on the table beside him. The teaware the group had been drinking from was still laid out on its polished surface.
“I’m parched.” He pulled out a chair and plopped himself down. “All this effort to get things through your thick head has made me terribly thirsty. Oh, what a hardship.”
“Uh…” Reirin blinked in confusion; that had certainly come out of nowhere. Still, considerate as she was, she followed his gaze and rose from her seat. “I apologize for not noticing sooner.” She poured hot water into the teapot and refilled his cup. “Here you go.”
“Oh, thank you.” Gyoumei didn’t take the proffered tea. Without so much as savoring its aroma or sparing the delicate teacup a glance, he took Reirin’s hands in his own and worriedly asked, “Did you burn yourself? It must have been difficult to work with a different tea set than usual. Was it too heavy for you?”
“It wasn’t, no…” Reirin gently extracted her hands. She wished he would give the questions a rest and just drink it.
“I’m so thirsty,” Gyoumei muttered again, despite having yet to touch the tea already served to him.
Had the water been too tepid? Confused though she was, Reirin brewed a hotter cup of tea with water from the iron kettle atop the brazier.
“Thank you,” he said with a smile, but he didn’t reach for the second cup either. “You have a real talent for serving tea. Here, take this as a token of my gratitude.” The affluent crown prince then produced an opulent fan from his robes.
“No, that’s entirely—”
Reirin attempted to refuse, but Gyoumei pushed it into her hands. Then he slumped back against his chair once more and stared up at the ceiling. “Oh, how I thirst.”
By this point, even Reirin could tell he was messing with her. She knit her brow, but just to be on the safe side—if the crown prince truly was thirsty, she had to do something about it—she changed the tea leaves, brewed a fresh cup of tea lukewarm enough to drink right away, and placed it next to the other two.
“Thank you. I’m a lucky man. Let’s see, what should I give you as thanks? Do I have anything suitable on hand?” Gyoumei rummaged through his sleeves without taking the teacup.
“Your Highness,” Reirin finally interjected when the third cup went untouched. “What are you doing?”
“Exactly what you’ve done,” he shot back. Reirin sucked in a breath. “I don’t mean to refuse your charity. I understand you were worried about me, and I’m grateful that you went to the trouble of making me tea. Hence, I wish to repay you as soon as possible. I want to see you smile.”
It was an echo of Reirin’s own speech. When she said nothing in response, Gyoumei pointed to one of the teacups. “And yet, I can take a good guess at what it made you think: ‘Stop prattling on and just drink the damn tea!’”
“Oh!”
He was exactly right.
“Listen here, Reirin.” Gyoumei stood from his seat. He sat Reirin down instead, leaving both hands planted on her shoulders. “You pour someone tea because you wish to alleviate their burdens. The first thing the server wants is not repayment, it is for the recipient to drink the tea and quench their thirst. Shu Keigetsu is not looking for you to return the favor. All she wants is for you to accept her feelings and stop behaving so recklessly.”
As Gyoumei watched the Maiden hang her head, he picked out one of the cooler cups of tea and offered it to her. “Does that make sense to you?”
Reirin cradled the teacup in both hands and lapsed into silence.
At length, she spoke in a small, trembling voice. “It…it does not.”
Soft ripples danced across the surface of the tea. She sounded like a child.
“Debts must be repaid,” she said. “If you’ve caused someone trouble, you must atone, and if someone has done you a kindness, you must reciprocate.”
Favors were to be returned. That was the principle by which Reirin had lived her whole life. If she made those around her worry, she would cover up her poor health so as not to cause them further distress. Everyone treated her kindly, so she put color in her cheeks with makeup to make them happy. Her mother had died giving birth to her, so she lived on despite her illness to ensure the woman could rest in peace.