Chapter 119

CHAPTER 4 The Partners in Crime Choose Their Path Urgh. I’m just so jealous.” The girl sitting before me had hair as black as death, and a blindfold the color of dried blood. Pale, ashen skin, and bound in rusted iron chains. I recognized her from before. “You are…Envy, if I’m not mistaken,” I said. But where am I? We had run into a magic portal somewhere inside Master’s mind and had all fallen inside. I remembered that much, but after that I must have passed out, because I woke up somewhere completely different. I was surrounded by carved stone walls, as if I was inside a castle. The construction was impressive, but the room itself was a mess. Large cracks ran through the walls and windows, dust was piled up on the floor, large cobwebs spanned the shadows, and the paintings looked like they’d been salvaged from the ruins of a burned-down building. But most notable were the statues. Knights, kings, wizards, all with pieces missing and covered in scratches, almost as though someone had mutilated them on purpose. Through the castle windows, I could see the remains of a once-prosperous town. Even from afar, I could tell what a sorry state it was in now. Envy sat at a worn-out table and chair, holding a teacup and glaring at me with a murderous rage that tickled the hairs on my skin. “…I see. I assume you are to be my next opponent?” I questioned. I could already tell how strong she was going to be. I wouldn’t last five seconds unless I went all out from the get-go. “…Primordial Regression!!” I called upon every drop of power I possessed, feeling a faint sense of intoxication come over me. This was my ultimate technique, which I had honed during my long separation from Master. I had told Towako about the time Kuu hatched and flew into me, and she had taught me how to use that power without Kuu’s help. I couldn’t use any of the skills like “Maniacal Scarcalling” that Kuu had granted me, nor did that mysterious protection or “Awakened Ability” appear in my skill list like before. However, I did receive a significant boon to all my stats. According to Towako, I was using magic to “unlock my latent genetic potential.” I had asked her what that meant, but she’d kept on saying words like “DNA” and “genome” that I didn’t quite understand. While in this state, I was told that my eyes changed from their normal beige color to a deep blue, with slitted pupils like a dragon’s. From the corner of my eye, I could see strands of my hair that had turned white and glowed softly. “I envy you,” said Envy. “I envy your life. You get to live with my lord. You don’t have to be alone. You get to be saved!” “…I see.” Envy put down her teacup. It had been empty. She rose to her feet. “Face my trial! Sword of Sin: Jealous Pariah! For this is the point of no return!” “Oh, I passed that point a long time ago.” Those silent words of mine heralded the beginning of an explosive battle. “Rusty chains, bind my foe! Cindered Snake!” “Toxic mists, come to my aid! Intoxicating Phantasm: Poison Armor!” Chains rattled as an enormous serpent of iron links came barreling toward me, but upon coming into contact with the noxious fumes that surrounded me, it corroded away into nothing. “Bite and fester! Intoxicating Phantasm: Eight-Headed Serpent!” “Sigh of Dust! Blow it all away!” In return, I summoned a serpent of toxic goo, but upon touching Envy’s cloud of mist, it rotted into dust. “Argh, I’m so, so, so, so, jealous!!” “Well, this is getting boring.” Ever since the battle began, we had just been endlessly countering each other’s moves. My ice magic was ineffective, and it was only the creations of my intrinsic ability that even caused her defenses to waver, but even that wasn’t enough to harm her. I was only managing to keep nullifying her attacks, but if Towako hadn’t trained me, I wouldn’t have even lasted this long. It seems as if my poisons and her substance control are an even match. In which case… I needed to get out of here and hurry to Master’s side as soon as possible. And if I couldn’t settle this at long range, then perhaps I needed to close in for the kill instead. “Intoxicating Phantasm: Toxic Rain!” The poison mist protecting my body suddenly expanded in volume, and I channeled even more mana into it. Envy was used to casting from afar, so her agility was not too great. Combined with some physical buffs, I was able to step into her range. My poison mist and Envy’s noxious cloud collided and began eating each other away. It appeared Envy’s cloud was winning that battle, but all I needed was a few brief seconds in which to bring my blade to bear. “Haah!!” I raised my sword high. It was clad in mists, as I was. However… “I’m so jealous!! Why can you use a sword, and I can’t?! Why can you use poison and I can’t?! Why do you have things that I don’t?!” Just as my blade was about to slice through her neck, Envy’s own miasma enveloped it and stopped it from moving. It was as if all her mists had suddenly concentrated at that point, and they ate away the poison fog protecting my blade, transforming it into dust. “These poison mists, that sword…even your hand. They should all just go away!!” “I’d really rather they didn’t,” I replied. “You think you can escape?!” “I don’t need to. Not now that my poison has started taking effect.” Envy’s attacks had been turning my poison mist into dust. However, that didn’t make the resulting substance any less toxic. Even as dust, it remained a poison under my control. And so, although I knew it wasn’t enough to change things on its own, I had slowly been using Intoxicating Phantasm to set the stage. “Once you no longer have that miasma of yours, my poisons will be able to end this. Now, fall into an intoxicating slumber.” With Envy’s protective mist weakened, I could command the poisonous dust that was scattered at our feet. All I needed was a few particles, and Envy didn’t even have to breathe them in. They would just have to touch her skin. Envy shook, and then her arms dropped loosely by her sides. The poison I had conjured inflicted an illusion of the target’s innermost desires. I would have her lead me to Master personally. “Now, all I have to do is…” “Minnalis? …Is that you?” A sweet, luscious voice reached my ears. “Master?!” I turned to the source of the voice, to see him bound to a cross by thick chains. “Urgh…” “Master! Are you okay?!” I sliced the chains off him and caught him as he fell to the ground. “What happened? What are you doing here?” “I don’t know either,” said Master. “I just woke up, and here I was.” “…” “Did you come to save me, Minnalis?” “Yes, I did. I came to see you, Master.” “Thank you. I knew I could count on you. You’re my greatest friend, Minnalis.” He smiled sweetly. The sight brought only one emotion to my mind. “…Oh.” “…Rgh. Sorry, but I don’t think I can move just yet. Could we just…lie here for a while?” “Of course,” I replied with a smile. And then… “Stay right there, as you wish…and die.” I took up my sword and thrust it into his heart. For it was nothing less than pure rage that drove me. “Wh-why…?” “Why? Tee-hee! What a silly question. Isn’t it obvious? It’s because I’m furious!” My mask crumbled, and true emotion twisted my face. “Or maybe it’s because I realized you’re not Master.” “…” When I said that, all the pain and fear vanished from Master’s face, and he turned stern. Next, I extracted from him the illusion magic I had cast on Envy. When I did that, his face transformed back into hers. “I recreated your technique perfectly,” she said. “My power is total control over substance. I can recreate anything as I see fit. Even your poison, a perfect illusion that never ends. How could you tell?” “The poison,” I explained, “is only as good as its wielder. The illusions come from the caster’s own mind, and so you can only create the master that you know. In order for it to be effective, you need to imagine the person the target is expecting to see. Otherwise, they’ll sense that something is wrong and break the spell.” “…” “And Master has never called me a friend. I am his partner in crime. Besides, he is far more dashing than that.” “…I see. I’m so jealous. I wish I had that kind of connection…” Envy showed little emotion upon her face, but the words she spoke were ones I longed to say. “You may be jealous of me,” I said. “But I have plenty of reasons to be jealous of you as well.” I decided to hold it back no longer and opened my heart. “How come you get to be a part of Master, and I don’t? You’re always with him, no matter what happens, and nothing can tear you apart. Argh! It just makes me so jealous!” “…” “It’s not fair! It just isn’t fair! Why do the others have things that I don’t have?! Why is Shuria so pure? Why does Mai get to be his sister? Why is Nonorick so cute? Why does Leticia get to have a deep relationship? And you! I hate you most of all! Why do you get to literally be part of his power?!” It felt like my heart was being filed down. It felt like my throat was being squeezed. It felt like my whole body was roasting in fire. I had been forced to feel what it was like to be separated from Master, to be unable to help him, and so I longed to be joined to him permanently, like the being in front of me was. And if that being ever tried to take Master for herself, I didn’t know what I’d be capable of. “I won’t let anybody have Master, you hear me? No one will serve him but me!” Yes, that was what I truly thought. That was how I truly felt. He was mine and mine alone. “Argh, I’m so jealous,” said Envy. “So incredibly jealous…but fine.” “Huh?!” Envy’s body suddenly dissolved away into sand and reassembled a short distance away. “I have seen the darkness in your heart, and you pass. The trial is over.” I stood up, not wanting to let down my guard for a moment, but I couldn’t sense Envy’s desire to fight any longer. Instead, she reached out a hand and tore a hole out of thin air. “Be sure your mind is made up,” she said, “for there is no turning back beyond here.” “I believe I said as much already,” I replied. “There is nowhere for me to turn back to.” And with that, I stepped through the door, to wherever Master was waiting for me. “Tee-hee. Oh, how enviable.” After Minnalis left, Envy’s room returned to its usual silence. “However, it is a welcome envy.” She back sat down and resumed sipping from her empty teacup. For whatever reason, she looked happy. Trial of Envy: Passed. “Tee-hee-hee. Come, let the trial begin. Sword of Sin: Lusty Little Girl. For this is the point of no return.” I could hear a voice, very distant, but grating on my mind. “…uri…” Like an irritating feeling grinding at the edges of my heart. “…i…… Shu…” But that irritation was lost beneath the warm feeling surrounding me, as if I was bathing in hot milk. “Hey! Shuria! Wake the hell up!” “Wah!!” My eyes flew wide open, like a bucket of ice-cold water had been thrown over me. “GROOOOAAAAAHHH!!” “A Crystal Bear?!” Right under my nose was a crystalline monster, reflecting the light of the sun at me. “Earth, split open! Ground Quake!!” Kaito thrust his sword into the ground, fracturing it, and an enormous chasm opened between the monster and me. Spears of rock flew up out of the opening, scaring the Crystal Bear back. “Grrrrrr…” I recognized this forest. Lush trees, bushes with little red berries, and rust-colored soil with no weeds. The boulder that I used to use for target practice. The tree under whose shade Shelmie, Mother, and I all sat. “Keep it together, Shuria! We’re in the middle of battle, here!” “H-huh? O-Okay!!” Th-that’s right! We came back to my village! After we’d exacted vengeance, Kaito and Minnalis had brought me back to my old hometown. There, we had heard about dangerous beasts that sometimes crossed the mountain range and threatened the villagers. We set out at once to keep the village safe. To keep the village…safe? H-huh? Something’s not right… “Grrrroaaaaahhh!!” “Fight for me! Puppet Possession: Rust Armor!!” I called upon my magic, ordering the suits of armor I puppeted to attack the monster. What am I thinking, spacing out in the middle of a fight? First things first, we have to beat up the bad guys! The Crystal Bears formed into a pack, and we were all fighting separately, at a distance where we could back each other up if we needed to. Kaito and Minnalis are both doing their best, so I can’t let our team down! “Rust Armor: Quintuple Slam!” “Graaaagh?!” My five suits of armor descended on the bear, smashing it to pieces with their hammers and greatswords. “Shuria! There’s one more heading your way!” “Leave it to me!!” The monsters were very stubborn, and we fought them for a while. “Yah! …Phew! Shuria, I think that’s the last one! Isn’t it, Master?” “Yes, I think so. I don’t sense any others around.” “Then after this, we’re done!!” “Gaaaaarghh?!” My suits of armor ganged up on the last Crystal Bear and pummeled it into glass shards. Very quickly, they dispatched the final monster and brought an end to the battle. “They were a little tougher than I expected,” said Kaito, putting away his weapon. “We should get down off this mountain before it gets dark,” said Minnalis. I looked to the sky to see that it was already evening. When I was younger, I would always return home around this time. “Let’s leave our report to the guild for tomorrow, then,” said Kaito. “We’ll head back to Shuria’s village for now.” “To my…village?” “Yeah, that was the plan all along, right? It’s a little far to the town where the guild is, after all.” “We had better hurry,” said Minnalis. “It’ll be pitch-black around here soon.” Now that the battle was over, that strange feeling came back. Hmm? Something’s bothering me… I was starting to doubt my own senses, but the other two threatened to leave me behind, so I hurried on after them. We followed a trail I had traced many times as a child, down the mountains and into the village that lay at their foot. Before long, my hometown came into view. “Finally, we can let our guards down and relax,” said Kaito. “We’ve been rushed off our feet lately, so it’ll be nice to let our hair down,” said Minnalis. I, on the other hand, was speechless. “…This can’t be real…” I muttered. As evening closed in, the village was bustling. Hunters returning with their kills. Old ladies bringing in the laundry. Young children rushing to get home before the sun set. “Hmm? What’s gotten into you, Shuria? You keep spacing out.” “Yeah, you’ve been acting strange all day. Is something the matter?” “Huh? …Oh, no, it’s nothing.” It sounded like they didn’t hear what I’d said. I tried to cover it up, but in truth I was greatly agitated. I felt a heart-wrenching nostalgia along with something else, an emotion that I couldn’t name, opposing it, growing as the nostalgia grew. They were both strong emotions, but I couldn’t explain either of them. I continued to wonder about it while the three of us set off walking toward my house. “Oh, if it isn’t little Shuria! How are you today?” “You asked her that this morning, Granny.” “Did you head into the mountains to take care of the monsters today? You aren’t hurt, are you?” As I walked through the village, the villagers all called out to me. I couldn’t explain why talking to them felt so strange. The nostalgia and the other emotion grew and grew until I felt like I would scream. And then, at last… “This is…my house.” The knob on the door that was just a little too big for my hand. The dark, slightly knotted lumber used for the walls. The cheap glass windows, and the soft light of the hearth spilling out from them. It was my home, my childhood residence. The familiar sight warmed my heart. “Looks like the sun’s set,” said Kaito. “We’d better get inside before it gets cold.” “Come on, Shuria. Don’t just stand around outside. Come in. Your mother and sister are waiting for you inside, you know?” “My…what?” Minnalis’s words were like grains of sand, clogging the gears of my brain. My mind went blank, and time ground to a halt. It took me a while to comprehend what I had just heard. She then stepped forward and opened the door. “Shuria?” Standing in the doorway, a curious look on her face, was my sister. “Shel…mie…?” My little sister Shelmie was standing there, exactly as I remembered her. Then…why? Why? Somewhere deep in my head, I heard something straining against the pressure. My mind was a mess; a swirling chaos tearing parts of my heart from my chest, and yet I had no idea why. “Welcome back, Shuria!! Are you okay? Did you get hurt out there?” Shelmie ran up to me, but I couldn’t find the words to respond. “Uh… Um… Y-yes, I’m okay. No, I wasn’t hurt…” I felt like I missed her so much, my heart couldn’t take it. Then my mother showed up, having just cooked supper. “Shuria?” she said. “Oh, you’re back! I’ve been so worried about you!” She placed a large pot on the table, then ran over to me. I didn’t know why, but I wanted to cry. I wanted to scream. I wanted to shout. And the straining and creaking of my mind didn’t stop. “Shuria? What’s the matter?” “…” As I listened to her voice, another crack formed. “Shuria? D-did something hurt you after all?!” “…” As I looked upon her face, another fissure opened. “Oh no! Should we call a priest?” “…” As I watched her behavior, the seams began to split. “Hey, Shuria? Are you sure you’re all right?” “Shuria? What’s gotten into you?” Until. Fwp! From the shadows, a pair of gauntlets fell on the shoulders of Kaito and Minnalis. “Please shut the hell up and just die. ” “Kh…” “Hk…” The restraints around my heart fell to pieces, and my reddened, festering rage was unleashed. “Sh-Shuria?! What have you done?!” “Shuria, why…?” There was a thump, thump, as two severed heads fell to the floor. I cast my gaze down at the lifeless eyes of Kaito and Minnalis. “Oh, shut up. Shut up already. Aah, how could you do this to me? How could you crush my reality with dreams like this?” I finally realized what I was feeling. It was something I hadn’t felt in a long, long time. Wrenching out my organs. Driving a burning spike into my eyes. Going at the back of my throat with a cheese grater. The fires that roasted me alive, not from without, but from within. They were no less valuable. “Dance to the pull of my strings. Puppet Possession: Big Kitty!” I called upon the monster born that day, the moment my life ended. “ME-YEOWWWW!” My magic summoned a large plush cat. It held a knife and fork in its paws, and wore a bib stained with something that looked an awful lot like ketchup. It was my very first familiar, molded out of my own hatred. The only difference was the size. The original was small enough to carry, but this one was almost twice my size, and in the center of the bib, there was a grotesquely large mouth. The knife and fork were both stained red, and its eyes were made of many buttons stitched together, like the eyes of a fly. “Mother and Shelmie are already dead,” I said. “Wh-what are you talking about?! W-we’re alive! We’re right here!” Her voice was like poison in my ears. “They lived their lives,” I continued. “In my world, they lived on, in whatever form that took.” Eumis had turned them into undead creatures, stolen everything from them, including their dignity, and had left them to be devoured by a demon. They’d died in agony. “Shuria?! Calm down, please! We’re not dead!” So why would you bring them back just to play out this twisted game? “I’m afraid you are, Mother. I saw it with my very own eyes.” Just so you can take them away from me again? “You saved us, don’t you remember?” said Shelmie. “Eumis tried to kill us, but the three of you came and saved us!!” “That sounds wonderful,” I replied, “but it’s not reality. Eumis turned the two of you into zombies, and then a demon ate you for supper.” Just so you can take their deaths from me as well? “That was just a bad dream you had! Please calm down! Look at me? I’m real! There’s nothing to be scared of, please! Shelmie and I, we’re both—” “I said shut up! Stop talking to meeeeeeee!!” Leave it right where it is. Don’t sully that memory. “Big Kitty! Gobble them up!” Though they may have looked very different then, I had seen my mother and Shelmie in their final moments. “GROOAAAAAAHHH!!” “No! Shuria! Please don’t do this!!” “Why are you doing this, Shuria?!” Big Kitty transformed his fork into a sinister-looking spear and skewered Mother and Shelmie’s clothes, hoisting them both into the air. “No matter how much you look like them, you’re not!” “I am! Please trust me, Shuria!” “I’m begging you, Shuria! I am your mother!” “…All you’re doing now is insulting the world that we have to live in.” “Yum yum yum yum!” “Gah?!” “Gh!” Driven by my hate, Big Kitty raised his horrifying, serrated knife and sliced their bodies in two. Then, crunching and squelching, he piled both halves of those abhorrent things into the mouth on his bib. I just watched, not wanting to miss a single second of it. I watched as arms snapped, feet broke, shoulders twisted, and chests collapsed. Bit by bit, cracks appeared in the world. The dream was ending. I was waking up. From this sweet fantasy that felt like a nightmare. “…” When the very last parts of my mother and sister disappeared inside Big Kitty, I said something I don’t even remember. Was it a curse? Was it regret? Or was it something else entirely? When the sounds of chewing died down at last, the dream world crumbled, bringing me back into reality. The room I was in looked like a child’s, strewn with toys. From the ceiling hung some kind of magical item, emitting light and clanking as it turned, while the walls and windows were all different colors—white and yellow and pink. There were piles of dolls and plushies, toys that made a noise when you shook them, toys that lit up when you pressed them. Even the furniture—the table, the chairs, the desk, the bed—every piece looked like dollhouse furniture scaled up to human size. All the contents of the rooms were broken in some way, distorted and twisted from their original form. The room’s idyllic appearance was in tatters, as if someone was trying to deny its very existence. “Am I…still in Kaito’s mind?” I took a look around, refusing to let my guard down for a moment. I couldn’t stay asleep forever.