Let us go back in time somewhat.
When Arcrayne left Sachis’s room after the long conversation, his face was clouded over. Estelle’s eyes saw that his mana was utterly dark.
No wonder... she thought.
He’d just been told that Truteliese, whom he’d seen as his enemy all this time, had in fact been working together with Sachis and plotting to bring down Mircea Marwick. Arcrayne must’ve had indescribable feelings swirling around inside him.
After they had walked some distance from Sachis’s room, Arcrayne stopped.
“I hate myself for being so small-minded. Why does this anger me so much?” he said.
“I believe it is only natural for you to feel that way about this matter. It made me angry too, and I had to wonder if there had not been a better way of going about things,” replied Estelle.
Arcrayne walked up to a window in the corridor and looked outside. As this was the second floor, the window had a clear view of the whole garden.
The garden of the Leo Palace was split into two parts. One was a hedge maze, while the other was an Eastern-style garden with a folly in the style of the Yang Empire at the center.
“This used to be purely a rose garden, back in the day,” uttered Arcrayne, calmly gazing out at the garden. “She gave me the contaminated tea at the gazebo that used to be there.”
Estelle gently placed her hand on Arcrayne’s arm out of concern.
“After that, I was given the Libra Palace... When I next set foot here in the Leo Palace, the garden had changed completely. And not just the garden, but everything inside the building too. They’d gotten rid of everything that had been left from when my real mother was alive.” The prince clenched his fist on the window frame. “That’s why it’s hard to believe, even now. I always thought my father came to love her instead.”
Arcrayne was deeply hurt. Estelle was painfully aware of it, but she couldn’t find what to say to him.
“She used to be kind. It should make me happy to know it wasn’t fake...” With that preamble, Arcrayne began telling Estelle about his childhood. “When she first came to the palace, she seemed sad, as though she had something dark weighing on her heart.”
However, as Truteliese had grown used to life in the palace, she’d brightened up, little by little. According to Arcrayne, talking to her had filled the hole left in him by the death of his biological mother.
“That’s why I couldn’t forgive her for poisoning my tea right after Liedis was born. Father said it was to protect me, but I can’t rein in my emotions so easily...”
It’s only natural... remarked Estelle. She felt like she was seeing the very thing that had made Arcrayne the man he was right now. As she’d been blessed with a good family environment, she couldn’t imagine how deep a scar it must’ve left to be betrayed by someone you’d trusted unconditionally.
“I’m glad you have that power, though,” said the prince. “I’d rather know the truth than have it hidden from me forever...”
His words took Estelle by surprise. “It is a relief to hear you say that.”
Her eyes had laid Truteliese’s real intentions bare. Estelle couldn’t confidently say that knowing the truth always made one happier than the alternative. She’d been feeling guilty because of that. That guilt felt a little lighter after what the prince had said.
“Maybe everything would’ve gone smoothly if I had never existed.”
“Why would you say that?!” exclaimed Estelle.
“Think about it. If I was never born, Mircea wouldn’t have become so recklessly violent. And in the first place, my real mother might’ve still been alive.”
“Stop it!” Not wanting to hear any more, Estelle clung to Arcrayne’s back before she knew it. “I think I understand the feelings that make you give yourself up to despair, but you cannot say that! I do not even want to imagine a world without you!” Tears welled up in her eyes, blurring her vision. “I love you! What am I supposed to do with these feelings?”
Arcrayne trembled, perhaps shaken up by Estelle’s words.
“Please do not say you wish you never existed—it is simply too sad...”
As Estelle pleaded in tears, her arms around the prince, a much larger hand enveloped her own.
“Be with me today,” asked Arcrayne, turning around and making eye contact.
Estelle nodded and buried her face in his broad back.