“You were so late in returning I was worried.”
Olivia laughed. “Sorry about that. I was doing a bit of training for the first time in ages.”
“You what? Training?”
“But forget that. Is everyone depressed about something or what?”
“Well...” Evanson seemed to hesitate before he told her in a mutter that she should ask Claudia directly. Olivia was confused, but agreed to do just that, then headed into the building that housed the commander’s station. She returned the salutes of the soldiers she passed on the way until she arrived at the quarters of the second-in-command—her own rooms. She opened the door and saw through the window that it was raining.
It wasn’t raining just before. Oh well. I’ll take a break, then go and find Claudia and Ashton. She opened the large bay window behind her work desk, then bopped the gray rabbit soft toy that sat on the windowsill. Claudia had found the stark emptiness of the room so unbearable that she had left it there, looking mortified all the while. Olivia took off the bag from her waist, then placed the cloudy peach the stallkeeper had given her on the desk. Then, she swiveled the chair around to face the window and leaned slowly back. The soft pitter-patter of the rain was soothing. Drowsiness crept over her, and she was just drifting off when there was a half-hearted knock on the door. Olivia sensed at once that it was Claudia, but it didn’t sound like the Claudia she knew. That was enough to banish all her sleepiness.
“Come on in.”
Even though it hadn’t been so very long, the sound of Olivia’s voice filled Claudia with nostalgia as she opened the door. But then, when she thought about it, it was only natural given they had scarcely been apart since she had first been assigned as Olivia’s aide.
Olivia sat in a chair with its back facing away from her, staring out the window. With the sound of the rain in her ears, Claudia came up to the desk, then clicked her heels smartly and saluted.
“I’m glad to see you safe, General...”
“I was just taking a break before going to find you,” Olivia said. “But Claudia, what happened? You sound really down.” Olivia didn’t turn around to face her, for which Claudia was extremely grateful. She felt like she might start shaking at any moment, so she clenched her fists to hold it at bay as she forced herself to string words together.
“Ser, I have a report for you. Two weeks prior, the imperial army mounted an ambush on Fort Tezcapolis. Lieutenant Colonel Ashton Senefelder was killed in the fighting, along with at least four hundred of his soldiers.”
The silence could not have lasted more than ten seconds, but to Claudia it seemed like an eternity. She felt as though she was suffocating as she waited for Olivia to speak.
Olivia did not so much as twitch. “I didn’t understand you just now, Claudia. Could you repeat that?”
“As many times as you wish.” Claudia repeated her report, identical down to the letter. “Two weeks prior, the imperial army mounted an ambush on Fort Tezcapolis. Lieutenant Colonel Ashton Senefelder was killed in the fighting, along with at least four hundred of his soldiers.”
There was a slight creak as Olivia’s chair slowly turned. At the sight of her, Claudia’s breath caught in her throat. Olivia’s face, usually so expressive, was now entirely devoid of anything resembling emotion. Meanwhile, her ebony black eyes seemed to have grown even darker. For the first time, Claudia felt afraid of her.
I do not understand you, Claudia.
“G-General...?”
I said that I do not understand you.
“General, forgive me, I don’t know...” The cold, inhuman sounds that issued from Olivia’s mouth seemed to be a language, one that sounded at once like the irregular droning and keening of an insect cry, and also like a song. Either way, it was totally incomprehensible to Claudia.
She stood there at a loss, Olivia’s eyes boring into her. Then, Olivia slammed her fist down on the table. There was a mighty crack and the whole thing broke clean in half. A cloudy peach rolled onto the floor, coming to a stop at the toe of Claudia’s boot.
“Are you deaf? I’m telling you that this joke isn’t funny!”
“I’m not joking!” Claudia exclaimed. “Ser, do you seriously think this is something I would...I would joke about?”
Oh, if only it had been a joke. When Claudia had come face-to-face with Ashton’s body, her world had grown dark and cold. Even now, her memories of what had happened after were hazy, as though obscured by mist. All she did remember was being held in Lise’s arms. It had been two weeks since she had learned of Ashton’s death, but just the thought that she would never again see his smile or hear his voice made her shake.
But Ashton was not the only one who had died. Many of their soldiers had fallen in the battle, Gile among them. When seen in the light of all the lives that had been lost so far, it was unacceptable that the aide to the commander of the Eighth Legion should allow herself to wallow in grief over a single soldier. Every moment, Claudia sternly reminded herself that the war was not over yet.
“There is more, General,” she said. “Marshal Cornelius, Senior General Paul, and Brigadier General Otto all lost their lives in the battle with the undead.”
Olivia stared down at the worktable she had destroyed, then, without another word, she started walking toward the door. Claudia reacted instinctively to place herself in the way.
“Move.”
“Where are you going, ser?”
“Where else would I be going? I’m going to murder the human who killed Ashton and the undead who killed Grandpa Cornelius and Grandpa Paul and Otto.”
“You can’t possibly know which soldier in the imperial army killed Ashton, to say nothing of the dead who killed the three commanders.”
“Then I’ll kill the whole lot of them!”
“Lieutenant General Olivia!” Claudia barked. “This is war. In war, people die easily. Those are the words you always said to the soldiers.”
“Colonel Claudia Jung,” Olivia replied at length. “I order you to move aside right now.”
“I do not accept that order. You are not just any soldier, ser, you are the general in command of the Eighth Legion. I will not stand by any longer while you put your personal feelings above your duty.”
“All right. Then I quit the army. Now you’ve got no grounds to stop me.”
“You—?!” Claudia exclaimed. “I am still not letting you go, and that’s final!”
If Olivia had really wanted to, she could have eliminated Claudia without breaking a sweat. But Claudia still grabbed hold of her to try and stop her.
“Let me go.”
“I will not!”
Olivia didn’t drag herself from Claudia’s grip; instead, she started walking without another word, and Claudia found herself bodily dragged along.
“Get yourself under control, for Ashton’s sake!” she burst out. Olivia stopped short, then looked furiously at Claudia.
“For Ashton’s sake?! He’s dead, and you’re...! Claudia, aren’t you even sad?!”
“How the hell could I not be sad?!” Claudia shoved Olivia away from her as hard as she could. Olivia stumbled a few steps, a look of utter surprise on her face. “Of course I’m sad,” Claudia went on. “I still can’t sort out everything I’ve been feeling since I heard he was dead. Every day I ask myself why I wasn’t there when he needed me most, and the guilt I feel only grows. But even then, even then, I have no choice but to move forward.”
She fell silent for a moment, then continued, “Ashton once said there was so much he wanted to do when peace returned. For us, the ones left behind, we’re the only ones left who have the power to bring about the peace he so wished for. In other words, ending this war. After all that time that Ashton fought when he never wanted to fight, this is what I can do for him... That’s why I’m...why right now...just for now...” Claudia let out a sob, her tears splashing on the floor. Olivia sat down there and then and began to bawl like a child.
The rain did not let up for three days and three nights, as though it too sympathized with the two in their grief.