Chapter 8

It was basically the same as when he lived in Japan, possibly even worse. Once he was bitten, he’d be out for the count. In this country, the only one who doesn’t treat me like prey is… Ryouta looked sadly at Shiren as she yawned on the couch. “Yaaawn. I get so tired after eating. Wake me up in half an hour. I’ve heard that a thirty-minute nap is good for you, and I pay very close attention to my health.” As she yawned, her shirt lifted to expose her belly button. Just get sick already, he thought. She’s really the only one… Everyone else looks at me like a snack… It honestly feels like I’m living in a country full of assassins… He hated to admit it, but Ryouta’s only safe haven was here in the Fuyukura house. It seemed as though she was really planning on falling asleep with her stomach exposed, so he threw a thin blanket over her. “Ooh! This is just what I expected from the minion I picked out. How considerate of you!” “A girl your age should have a little more modesty.” “There is no need for me to consider modesty before my own minion.” Shiren’s attitude said, What’s so embarrassing about showing my stomach? It’s not a big deal. Sure, her stomach wasn’t exactly much of a turn-on. But if it were Tamaki or Alfoncina, that would be a different story. “Hmm, y’know what this is like?” “What is it, Ryouta?” “Being an old married couple.” Ryouta thought it was a pretty good metaphor, himself. They weren’t embarrassed around each other, despite being the opposite sex. She could sleep in his presence with her stomach exposed. This wasn’t even boyfriend-girlfriend level; this was married-couple level. The way they were right now, one of them could start complaining about the smell of the other’s socks without serious consequences. In a way, this was the exact kind of relationship Ryouta was looking for. Even if this was kind of an extreme case, it was a win if a man and a woman got this close. Ryouta had spent his days in regular society being targeted over and over again, like a zebra being chased day in and day out by lions. It had made him wish for a calm space like this, more than anything else. To him, this roommate situation was ideal. I think I could manage as a minion for a long time. And if the person who fell asleep beside him wasn’t Shiren, but Ouka… In his mind, Ryouta replayed everything Shiren had said, except that Shiren herself had been replaced by a seventeen-year-old Ouka. “Ahhh, that was great. I guess the only thing you’re really good at is cooking, Ryouta, but I suppose I’ll praise you for that.” “C’mon, we’re married. Why do you sound so condescending?” “Well, you’re the one who married me, and you seem pretty happy about it. Phew, I get so sleepy after dinner. Wake me up in half an hour.” “Hey, your stomach’s showing. Be a little more modest, will you?” “Does it matter? You’ve seen much more than my stomach.” It was way better than he had hoped. He decided he would run this little simulation every day. That was how things would probably be if he married Ouka—she might be a bit high-handed with him, but nothing extreme. Could he trade Shiren in for Ouka? But if he were with Ouka, then they’d probably act less like an old married couple and more like eternal newlyweds, but his relationship with Shiren now was more the former. “Man, this whole mellow vibe really is a lot like being an old married couple. Not that I’ve ever been married, but…” Now that his mind had slipped into a fantasy, he mentioned it aloud. There was no romantic meaning to it at all, of course. But when Shiren heard him say married couple, her reaction was way different. “M… M-m-m-m-m-m-marrie—?!” Shiren seemed oddly panicked, so much that she couldn’t even say the word and cut herself off by biting her own tongue. She was flustered, everything to the tips of her ears bright red. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Ryouta! We are master and servant! Our relationship is nothing like that of husband and wife or boyfriend and girlfriend! Even if we do become close, there are still lines I will not cross! Like Mito Komon and Kaku and Suke might really trust one another, right? But it’s not like Suke would ever say Hey, Komo, couldja pass me the remote? Even if his life depended on it. You really need to have a good think about this!” Shiren threw off her blanket and leaped up. Her drowsiness had vanished in a flash. “You don’t need to get that angry. You’re overreacting.” But his attitude only made Shiren even more indignant. Her eyebrows turned down into a V, or like the arms in the \(^o^)/ face. “Ryouta, did you seriously say ‘We’re like an old married couple’ without thinking about the implications?” “Well, yeah. Why? Did it make you think anything different?” “Grrrr… I know it makes sense, but it still makes me mad. Why…?” Something inside Shiren snapped. “Oh, Ryouta, I’m hungry. Go buy me jam bread from the convenience store. Now.” “What?! I thought you were so full, you were falling asleep!” “I burned calories being angry with my lousy minion. I’m going to starve. You can have the change and use it as your allowance. Here, take it.” A silver coin with a hole in the middle flew toward Ryouta. By Japanese law, that would be a fifty-yen coin. “I can’t buy a piece of jam bread with fifty yen!” “Who told you to buy a jam bread? Buy me three, three! And that is fifty sacred yen, thank you!” Ryouta thought about how much she forgot when she got desperate. “And what about this?” He pointed to the collar around his neck. “You’re not coming with me. I might get eaten if I go out alone, remember?” Shiren didn’t even have to say I totally forgot. It was practically written in bold font on her face. She hurriedly wrote something on a piece of cardboard. “Okay, put this around your neck and go!” It was a sign that said I AM THE MINION OF THE FUYUKURA FAMILY. It was even threaded with a string to put around his neck. “You want me to put this on? Seriously?” “Yes. Now you should have no problem.” “No.” “Get out! I tell you to leave, you leave! I don’t want to see your face at all right now!” Shiren was practically screaming at him. As for Ryouta, he was getting irritated himself. “What makes you think I want to see your face?!” When he left the house, a cool breeze washed over him, calming him down for just a moment. And here I was, thinking about how I could be a minion for a long time, but I guess I let my imagination run away with me… It was only a five-minute walk to the store, but it was embarrassing enough for him. He was walking around with a sign on his chest that read I AM THE MINION OF THE FUYUKURA FAMILY, after all. Like he was at a protest, although he had no idea what he’d be protesting. “They were laughing at me… In the five minutes it took to get here, three people started snickering at me…” Ryouta was still angry as he made his way to the store. Shiren became tyrannical like that sometimes. When she did, she always used her privilege as his master to do whatever the hell she wanted. Just last night, she’d come to him with tears in her eyes and said, “There was a roach in my room! You stand guard next to my bed!” And he managed only four hours of sleep that night. “If she gives me any other weird orders, I’m seriously leaving!” As he walked, stewing in his irritation, he reached the convenience store. It was called Nine-to-Eleven, which sounded like the name of a certain other company. “So it opens at nine in the morning and closes at eleven at night? I don’t think the office workers can use it in the morning, then. Is that okay?” He commented on something that was almost entirely irrelevant, then went inside. He’d buy the stuff he needed, then go straight home. Actually, he didn’t really want to go back. He didn’t want to see her. “Welco— Oh, what a surprise, Ryouta!” The familiar voice surprised him in turn. “Oh, Tamaki…Shijou?” He never expected to run into a classmate here. Library committee member Tamaki was doing a lot to help him in class. Well, more like Shiren had no intention of helping Ryouta even though he’d just started at an unfamiliar school. Tamaki was teaching him high school survival tips like “When that teacher writes words in yellow chalk, that means it will definitely be on the test” and “This teacher gets really angry when you sleep and hits you with the textbook.” She tended to think a little negatively, but that aside, she acted like a kind elder sister to him. She actually had a lot of guys who liked her. Ryouta, being a guy himself, could tell right away. She’s practically a perfect superhuman, despite how tragic she is. She seems like an artsy type, but she’s well put together. But, I guess, that aside… “Part-time job?” “No. My family runs this convenience store. It has such a bleak future, with terrible wages and nothing commendable about it. At night, delinquents will gather out front and make me anxious, and boys who are obviously in middle school come read Eden of Pleasure, even though the porno magazines are only for people eighteen-plus. Heh-heh.” “You don’t need to be so negative about it.” As always, she was being excessively humble, but that was just Tamaki’s natural setting. “This spot is both our store and our living space. I live together with my mother and father—my fifth father and seventh mother, that is.” “Your family tree is way too complicated, Shijou!” “So what have you come here for? I don’t believe you’re old enough to buy Eden of Pleasure yet.” “Is that the only reason I can come here?!” “If you’re not here to buy pornography, then…you’re here to shoplift, aren’t you…?” “I can’t believe that’s how you think of high school boys…” He was rather shocked to learn that his only options were porn or theft. “No, I was just thinking about how emotionally difficult it must be for you, since you came to the Empire all of a sudden. Now that a few days have passed, you should be beginning to wonder whether you’ll ever adjust, whether you’ll be able to keep up, your heart slowly breaking under the stress.” “…Bingo, Shijou. You’re really sharp…” She’d read him like an open book. “Yes. Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always had to have a good read on my parents, since we’re not related.” “Wait, you can’t just bring up heavy stuff like it’s no big deal! Shijou!” “Please come talk to me if you’re ever in any trouble. I mean, if you’re all right with someone like me, I’ll do my best to help.” Tamaki chuckled softly with an elegant smile. Shiren could never pull off that expression. Ryouta was touched. Shijou is such a great person… If I ended up married to Shijou, I feel like our home would be incredibly peaceful. It might be ordinary, but maybe that’s the happiest place to be, in a way… Wait, what am I thinking?! I need bread. He took three pieces of jam bread from the bread aisle and brought it to the register. “So you’re getting three…” He knew she’d say something. It didn’t exactly give a great impression. “There’s a reason for this.” “Are you Uncle Jam from Anpanman, Ryouta?” “What? No, why did you think of that? He can make bread on his own.” “My only friends are love and courage and my ball, but I have two hundred fifty friends online.” “You’re hinting that online friends aren’t real friends, aren’t you?” “So why do you need that much jam bread…?” she asked. They were finally back on topic. “Shiren is making me run errands. Just errands.” “I see; that’s why you’re wearing that sign on your chest. I thought you had some sort of public-shaming fetish.” The reminder of his appearance still gave him a nasty shock. “But please do help her out so that Fuyukura can smile. She’s been enjoying herself immensely since you came.” “Wait, she’s not like that all the time? I can barely tell, since we live together.” He had a feeling Shiren’s personality never changed, even when he wasn’t around. “I knew I had to do something for her as well, but I never found a way to help. I could never manage what you’re doing now.” A serious expression briefly crossed Tamaki’s face before she smiled again. “Please accept her as she is. And in exchange, I’ll help you with your troubles,” Tamaki said, almost sounding like Shiren’s big sister. “You’re like an angel, Shijou. I wish you were the one who picked me up instead of her. I could live forever in a faraway land if I were with you.” “What do you mean…?” Tamaki stared back at him with a blank expression. Her hand holding the bread stopped midmotion. “What? I mean exactly what I said.” Unsure of what just happened, Ryouta gave a straightforward reply. “I see… Very well. Okay, here is your jam bread. Um, that comes to…” Then when Ryouta went to take the bread and pull out the money from his wallet— Come here, come here, come here, a nice man will give you candy so come here, we want you to answer this survey so come here, come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come —the phrase come here, come here repeated in his head like an incantation. “Whoa! What the hey?! What’s this voice in my head?!” Barely able to keep himself still, Ryouta dashed through the store’s automatic doors. “What?! You haven’t paid yet! Shoplifter! Are you stealing because this is my house?!” “I’m sorry! My body’s moving on its own!” An endless loop of come here played in his mind. Nothing happened when he plugged his ears, since the words were coming directly in his brain. And his legs were moving on his own, carrying him somewhere. He eventually found himself carried through the nighttime town and stopped in front of Akinomiya Shrine—rather, the First Cathedral. “Oh, there he is.” Alfoncina XIII stood in front of the grand cathedral. “Wait, why did I end up here…? I ran all the way here without thinking about it…” “I wanted you to come, so I called for you. For the record, I did bite you and sort of made you my minion. If I really concentrate, I can bring you to me. I’ve so been looking forward to this.” Alfoncina XIII looked hard at Ryouta with big, sultry eyes. When he remembered what happened just a few days ago, he found himself getting anxious. She had bitten into him hard that day. And so, even though he wasn’t normally bound to anyone’s will, if Alfoncina wanted to call him over, she could. “Now that you mention it, Shiren did say you could at least call me over…” Ryouta felt like his human rights were being infringed upon, and his heart sank. “Awww, it’s all right. I can’t make complicated orders to a minion with little loyalty. This is the most I can get out of you, really. There’s no danger to you at all, dear.” “So what do you want? You’re holding a pot.” Alfoncina indeed held a big pot in her hands. “I made too much, so I’m sharing with you. I like to call this event I Have Some Food, Do You Want Some?” “Usually, it’s the person who made the food going around to offer it! And what did you make too much of?” Ryouta was rather interested in what other people made, since cooking was one of his specialties. “Oh, this is a very popular homemade dish. Tentacle—” That was not a word he expected to hear when talking about homemade food. “Oh, sorry, sorry! Slip of the tongue! It’s nikujaga! Meat and potatoes, I promise!” “Phew. If you were going to say that tentacles were a typical home dish for the Sacred Blooded, I was ready to vow on my whole seventeen years of life to destroy every last one of your kind. But what do tentacles have to do with nikujaga?” “See, the thread konjac looks like tentacles, doesn’t it?” She popped the lid open. Inside was a delicious-looking meat and potato stew. Both the carrots and potatoes looked excellently seasoned—it looked exquisite. But there was a lot more konjac in it than there should have been. “I’m sorry, but I don’t think I’ll be able to eat your nikujaga after what you just said.” “Oh, no, no, don’t mention it; please take home as much nikujaga—I mean tentacles—as you want, I insist.” “Nikujaga was the right word! Please just forget about the tentacles!” “Come in, come in. Come eat my nikujaga.” Even though she had already finished with her tentacles—er, dinner, she was inviting him inside. He forgot about the tentacle issue for a moment and timidly reached out to take a bite. “This is so good! It tastes like it was made at home and not at a restaurant, but you need to be incredibly skilled to make something like this. Only a very old-fashioned eatery could pull this off!” “Heh-heh-heh. Once the archbishop shows off her domestic talents, most men fall head over heels. Well, I won’t be doing anything untoward today, so no need to worry!” Anyone’s heart would flutter if they heard she was as beautiful as an idol and could also cook this well. Ryouta resisted, since his first crush, Ouka, was still in his heart, but if not for her, maybe he would’ve gone all the way and let the archbishop drink his blood. “Oh, and how have things been after about a week living with Shiren?” Alfoncina looked to Ryouta with a suggestive expression. “Nothing’s happened. It just tires me out. Was your whole point just to ask me that?” “It is my duty to look after her family, after all. Come on, tell me anything.” She was telling him to get things off his chest, so Ryouta honestly revealed how tired he was. “This is the first time in my life women haven’t been weirdly friendly with me. That’s why I think I got my hopes up.” “But in the end, Shiren has turned out to be too much—is that what you mean? Just tell me everything. I’ll give you some nonalcoholic beer.” “She’s really awful!” In short, it wasn’t the Sacred Blood Empire lifestyle that was wearing on him; it was Shiren specifically. He had to do the full range of cleaning, cooking, and laundry that day as well, and he also went out shopping. And when it was finally time for him to rest at night, she made him go out to buy some jam bread. He just wanted a break. With Alfoncina in front of him, all his pent-up grudges and hard feelings came pouring out. Wait, he felt kind of drunk. Was this really nonalcoholic? “I thought so. I knew this would happen.” Alfoncina followed along, pouring something that said daiginjo into her own cup. It might have been some kind of sake, but he ignored it. “Argh, now that I’m laying it all out here, Shiren really is a monster! Just help me with the chores! I did a search yesterday and learned that almost no Sacred Blooded masters shove everything off on their minions! Just this evening, she made me go out to buy jam bread for no reason!” The more he talked, the more his frustration toward Shiren burst out of him. “I was literally just thinking about how I could spend a long time as a minion. But I was wrong. I just want out of this country! I want to go back to Japan!” Ugh, this kid not only can’t hold his drink, but he’s an angry drunk… This isn’t good… As he spoke, Alfoncina remembered something. At the end of the day, she’d called him in to let off some steam, like someone would help out a new hire who was overly stressed. With as many underlings as she had, Alfoncina saw this a lot. And the sake was real sake. But with the way this is going, I feel like he’ll eventually say, That’s it; I’m quitting! She had to do something. “Hmm, I understand how you feel, Ryouta… But I think you should let her have this. See, despite the way she acts, Shiren can be a lonely person…” “I’ve made up my mind! I’m not going to be her minion anymore! I’m going back to Japan!” Internally, Alfoncina was starting to freak out. Oh no, oh no, oh no. Ryouta regretted it slightly once he said it, too, but once the words had left his mouth, there was no taking it back. That’s right. There was no need to force himself. He could just escape. He’d made some friends while he was here, but he could just go see them properly once the two countries had worked out their diplomatic relations. “But I don’t recommend escape. That’s suicide, you know.” She was right. He would inevitably have to go to the mountain in order to cross the border into Japan. There was a very real risk of his being attacked by another Sacred Blooded like Shiren. What could he do…? “Look, once our field trip is over tomorrow, you’ll have both Saturday and Sunday off, so why don’t you relax? Take a rest; take a breather.” “What field trip?” He had been so tired out, he hadn’t checked the next day’s schedule. “It said we have a field trip on the public information board. It seems we’ll be going to see the border at the mountain peak.” A visit to the border? That was it. “I could get back to Japan if I jumped over the border there!” I think…I just gave a rope to a suicidal boy… The next day, Alfoncina was so down that even her accompanying minions started getting worried. “Where were you wandering off to, Ryouta?! Why did it take you more than an hour to go to a store not five minutes away?! Ugh! And you reek of alcohol! You’re a high schooler—what are you doing?!” Just as he expected, Shiren was angry with him when he got home. “The archbishop summoned me. She gave me some tentacles—I mean, nikujaga.” He placed the containers of the stew into the fridge so they could eat it tomorrow. “And three jam breads. I’ll leave them out on the kitchen so you can just eat them whenever you get hungry.” “O-okay…” Ryouta was so candid about everything, there wasn’t much more that Shiren could complain about. “Hey, Ryouta, you can sleep in until seven tomorrow.” “I’m not gonna have enough time to make lunch if I sleep until seven.” “No, it’s fine. As thanks for the jam bread, I’ll make an extra-special lunch for you tomorrow. I’m making lunch tomorrow, okay? Don’t bother me!” “…Yeah, sure, fine.” Shiren felt a little uneasy with the way Ryouta was acting. That night, Ryouta crept into Shiren’s room as she slept. He wasn’t here to feel her up; he was here to check the map of Empire territory (read: a map of Akinomiya) that hung on the wall on the other side of her bed. Sure enough, there were a few border checkpoints within the mountain for imports and exports. If he could sneak into the mountain around those parts, then he might be able to escape back to Japan. There were plenty of things he didn’t like about Japan as well. He had to deal with the crazy Kiyomizu, and his sister being who she was, she apparently had taken off work the entire time he was gone. Well, as long as she wasn’t getting fired. But at least he was going home to his life. He felt so irritated when he was around Shiren—plus, she had Tamaki and Alfoncina to keep an eye on her. She still has friends at the end of the day. She asked me not to leave her alone, but she’s not alone at all. I’m the one who’s alone. This little life they had together would eventually break down anyway, so he would put an end to it now. “Thanks, Ryouta.” But just as he was thinking about ending their relationship, he heard Shiren whisper to him. He shrunk back. If he woke her, then he’d have to come up with a very good reason why he was in her room. “And I’m sorr… Zzz…zzz…” “Oh, you’re just a sleep talker.” Phew. I didn’t wake her up. But he didn’t understand why he felt so sorry hearing what she said. “Yaaawn.” “You’ve been yawning way too much. I told you, you didn’t have to make lunch.” They had just left school on the field trip, but Shiren had already yawned five times that day. Each class left together for the field trip, but they weren’t forced to walk in lines, so everyone bunched up with their friends. There was no one around Ryouta and Shiren. Tamaki would glance back at Ryouta from a distance every once in a while, but that was it. They’re treating us like an official class couple… Well, that won’t matter for much longer, though. “Yaaawn. I bet this lunch is gonna knock your socks off later. Yaaawn.” Shiren praised herself with an odd look. For Ryouta, he was on his way back to Japan. If anything, it would be easier for him to make up his mind if Shiren just started acting the villain. This is your fault. You’re the selfish one… But of all days, today had to be the one where she was in a good mood. “Oh, look at that bakery. That is a very well-known shop within the Empire. The owner’s nosebleed loaf incorporates blood from the nose in the dough—it’s so popular, it sells out within an hour of opening. The exquisite combination of doughy sweetness and metallic saltiness makes for an addictive combination.” “I’m not going! I will never go!” He’d decided to disregard all food and drink that had blood in it. Well, he had no intention of discriminating against the cultural regions of the world that used pig or sheep blood in their cooking, but nose blood was a hard no for him. “That soba shop is famous, too. They succeeded in bringing out a unique umami flavor and body by putting nose blood into the broth. The farm-fresh wasabi is great, too.” “Yep, not going there, either!” “Ooh! That ramen place there has a nose blood—” “Is there anything you don’t season with nose blood?!” As they walked through town, he found there weren’t any proper restaurants. “But I guess they’re not going to be catering to Japanese people… Sigh…” He was right—it was almost impossible for a Japanese person to live in this country. Before he knew it, Ryouta was staring at the ground. When they left the populated area, they immediately found themselves among rice fields. The city of Akinomiya had always had a rich agricultural industry. “Ooh, look at these fields! This view is in the 100 Places to Remember of the Empire. Take in the beauty before you!” “It’s just a regular field. It’s the Empire that’s decided it’s worth remembering.” Then a single frog leaped out from the stalks— —and landed straight on Shiren’s shoe. “F-f-f-f-f-frog, frog!!! Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!” Shiren reacted with a melodramatic display of terror and flailed, collapsing to the ground and rolling around. Ryouta stood by her, shocked by her absurd overreaction. “I give up, I give up! Time out, time out! I surrender! Wh-what do you want?! Money? I’ll give you as much money as you want! So get out; go away!” Like a pinned wrestler, Shiren slapped the ground with her hand. “I don’t care how scared you are of frogs; this is ridiculous! You even started making me scared of them!” “I’ll give you my minion, so please leave me alone!” “Don’t hand me over to the amphibians!” “I thought I told you. I can’t stand things that are all slimy…” “I thought you just meant things like okra or nameko mushrooms…” The frog, by the way, hopped right past Shiren and back into the rice field. “Pant, pant… It might come after us again, so you go first…” “I could, but that’s not really going to—” Ryouta’s hand was halfway extended when it froze in the air. It felt strange being kind to her after deciding he was going to leave. Instead, he called out to Tamaki nearby. “Let’s go.” He would be managing his own long chain now. “Oh, um, okay…I get it. That makes me glad, but I guess…I guess I will only ever be second to Fuyukura… Ha-ha-ha, of course that makes me happy, though…” Her response made it hard for him to tell if she was happy or sad. “But Fuyukura does seem happy to be with you after all, Ryouta. I’ve never seen her so lively and playful before.” Tamaki smiled, impressed. “That’s lively and playful? She’s always like that at home.” That was also exactly why her total lack of consideration for him had caught him so off guard. “I see… But you seem to be having quite a bit of fun yourself, Ryouta.” “Fun? Me? Nah… I might have a collar around my neck, but I’m not a masochist.” Mentioning the collar didn’t really make his argument any more convincing. “Hold on—now that I think about it, you and Shiren don’t really talk at all during school. You’re not on bad terms, are you?” Ryouta asked her. Well, Shiren had introduced them on the first day of school, so they couldn’t hate each other that much… “No, we’re on good terms. But I’m a chicken, and a weak, feeble caterpillar…” It seemed as though Tamaki would always and forever be negative, so he would stop commenting on it. “I guess Shiren tends to stand apart from the rest…” Who was she friends with in her class anyway? After walking for an hour afterward, they came to the border just in front of the mountain. The Self-Defense Force was keeping watch on the land on the Japan side. “This is the most important point within the Empire. Almost important as pineapple is to sweet-and-sour pork.” “Those can exist fine without each other!” “Wait, you don’t like sweet-and-sour pork with pineapple? Or nikujaga with peas?” “I’ve decided I’m going to stop talking to you about food.” Sure enough, there were long rows of trucks flowing in and out of the border. If he just took a few steps forward, he’d be back in Japan. Ryouta’s hopes were slowly building. Luckily, since he didn’t get any service on his phone here, he wasn’t getting creepy texts from Kiyomizu. Yesterday, including all the texts that were basically variations on I will be with you soon, my darling. In my birthday suit, if all goes well, he got a total of 237 messages from her. He wanted to mark it all as spam, but he’d have to see her in person once he went back to Japan, and that would be awkward. “Why are there so many trucks?” “Trade. Not only is Empire territory unfortunately not very big, it’s completely landlocked by Japan. So we currently import various daily necessities from Japan.” “Wait, I thought Japan hasn’t recognized this country as a sovereign nation?” “You’re right. Japan calls everyone who lives here Japanese, and the government can’t legally allow their own citizens to starve. That is why they send us so much.” “But do the Japanese gain anything from this?” “There is apparently some sort of deal with some Japanese politicians. The Emperor is a very tolerant type.” “Cool. Well, from what you just said, it sounds like the Emperor can get away with anything.” “—Hey.” She tugged on his collar. “I see that nostalgia in your eyes when you look at the Japan side. Don’t even joke about running over there. You are a subject of the Empire and my minion, okay?” “I—I know.” At some point, he must have gotten laser focused on the other side. It was obviously impossible for him to march right over the border, but it seemed relatively easy to slip into Japan through the nearby mountain. He would have to make a clean break for it without Shiren noticing. “All right, it looks like we’re headed to our lunch spot soon. I’ll show you what a traditional Sacred Blooded lunch looks like—I put my all into it. It’s free if you finish within a half hour!” “Don’t deny me the chance to really taste your food. And don’t take my money!” It scared him because he knew that Shiren would actually try to do that. “I don’t need your money. It’s all right so long as you feel obligated to me for the rest of eternity.” “Still a pretty steep price, if you ask me!” Well… It would look bad on him if he didn’t eat the lunch she made for him, so he decided he’d escape afterward. Their lunch spot was a ten-minute walk away from the border, at a little plaza that faced the mountain. If he could sneak into the trees behind them, then it should be easy for him to reach Japan. “You seem rather restless today, Ryouta.” He froze. He was showing his hand again. “It’s fine; I’ll just need to use the bathroom soon.” “Okay… It might be embarrassing, but if you feel anything out of the ordinary, you go straight to the urologist.” “That’s really none of your business.” “We’re eating now. There’s a bench over there.” There were several wooden benches at the other end of the plaza. Ryouta sat down next to Shiren. This is new, Ryouta thought. Shiren, being herself, was humming some sort of tune. “—Hey, that’s that cover the Emperor made! Stop!” “You blockhead. I’m just excited about eating lunch in the great outdoors.” Now that he thought about it, Ryouta had never eaten alone with a girl. That was because if he ever chose just one to eat with, it would create trouble among the other girls later. “Hurry up and open your lunch box. It’s a fabulous traditional Sacred Blooded meal. Eat it and weep.” Shiren handed a box to Ryouta, one that was a whole size bigger than her own and meant for men. He saw a slight shadow over her face. “Let me tell you now—if you seasoned anything with blood, I’m not eating it.” “How rude. I have made it to suit my minion’s tastes.” The contents were fancier than he expected. Fried mackerel, Japanese omelet, fried chicken, kamaboko, spinach boiled in soy sauce, pickled turnips, potato salad, dried purple shiso over rice, and pieces of pineapple and orange—all mixed together in a heap. “Do the Sacred Blooded have some kind of saying like Once it’s in your stomach, it’s all the same or something?” “……I was going to put them neatly in their own compartments, but I messed up the presentation, so I gave up and made it fried-rice style. Just give it a try—it will be delicious, I’m sure.” Ryouta took a bite. “Wow…! The grassy scent of the mackerel clings to the kamaboko, and then you can taste the lingering sourness of the pickles along with the dry texture of the rice.” “Okay, tell me if it’s good or not. I’m worried.” “It’s awful.” He didn’t even have to think about it. “All my hard work…,” she murmured in utter defeat. “Obviously. This is what happens when you mix it all together, even if you did make all the individual dishes properly.” “If only I had presentation skills… Next time Shenlong comes back to life, my wish will be for greater skills at presentation.” “You don’t need the galaxy’s most dramatic wish-giver for something so mundane!” “Yes. I’ll work even harder… A master needs to work to improve herself, too.” Something felt unusual about this whole thing to Ryouta—Shiren was oddly down today. “But they’re good on their own, right?! I put in a lot of love when I made it!” “Er, love…?” When Ryouta repeated the word, Shiren’s face grew bright red, and her shoulders jumped in a little spasm. “It’s—it’s just a figure of speech! …Ryouta? There’s something I want to tell you.” “Hmm? What is it?” He would be going soon anyway. It didn’t matter what she said to him. But when their eyes met, Shiren seemed to falter. “Uh… Yeah, I can just tell you later. Not now…” “Then I’ll hear it later.” In fact, he’d probably never hear what she wanted to say. He would be leaving this country. This was his big chance. If someone truly subjugated him, then he would never be able to leave… Alfoncina could summon him after just a little nibble, after all. And once that happened, he’d probably never see Ouka again. “I’m gonna run to the bathroom real quick…” He intentionally made sure not to look at Shiren. Once he was sure he was outside her field of vision, he finally stepped foot into the trees. Now that he thought back, this was close to where he came out when he first left the mountain. He walked close to the border, but there were people who looked like soldiers stationed all along it. Near the plaza, however, it was completely unguarded. People there probably wouldn’t be able to relax with a bunch of boorish soldiers nearby. But then a feeling of menace sent a chill running down his spine. What was that? He didn’t think anyone was nearby, so maybe it was just his imagination. He just kept pressing forward until he couldn’t feel the danger anymore. Yeah, he had definitely imagined it. And so he would be leaving the Sacred Blood Empire behind. Good-bye, Shiren. But then he heard the grass rustling before him, and something leaped out at him. “Wha…?!” Ryouta could barely speak. It was a small girl in a gas mask, carrying a gigantic cube-shaped rucksack on her back. She had a thick black jacket and a delicate white skirt. Maybe she was a part of some unusual squadron or something. Neither could move, not sure of what to do after running into each other. “I-I’m gonna die…” After a few moments, Ryouta stepped back. He wasn’t sure who she was, but he knew she wasn’t someone he should’ve run into. She probably wasn’t in the mountains picking vegetables dressed like that, that’s for sure. Luckily, he didn’t sense any malice from the gas mask. “Wait, wait, what…? No way, to think we would meet here… The power of love is real! Ahhh, the world really does belong to us!” He had heard that voice somewhere before—and it was not one he wanted to hear now. The gas mask popped off to reveal the unmistakable face of one of his Japanese classmates—Kiyomizu Jouryuuji. Out of all the girls in the world, this one was probably the most obsessed with Ryouta. She looked like a little girl with her long black hair and straight bangs (popularly known as the princess cut), but she was actually the same age as Ryouta. When she was with the boys in her class, the police would often ask if she was being kidnapped because of how young she looked. Ryouta had been questioned almost five times in his lifetime. She was nothing but trouble, so he wanted her to stay away. “Just as I mentioned in my text this morning, I’ve finally come all the way to this foreign land to find you. But I never thought we’d meet so quickly. This just confirms that our love is infinite.” “Wait, you weren’t just making stuff up…?” It was hard for him to determine what exactly he should believe because there had been so many messages. Being close to her was dangerous, so he slowly backed away. “Oh, there’s something I want to show you. It’s a new game about you. It went on sale two days ago.” Kiyomizu held out a PS-style case that said Ryou-Plus on it. “I solicited a big-name game developer to make it, and it’s finally finished. Now with this, I can boldly walk through town and whisper You’re so cute and I love you to you. I’ve only just passed thirty hours of play so far, but you and I are already head over heels in love with each other. We’ll be going to Atami next. And the eighteen-plus, only-for-adults version called Ryou-Plus: Ecstasy will finally be going on sale next month!” “Okay, there’s a lot I need to say, so I’ll just take this one piece at a time. First, I don’t remember ever giving you permission to make a game like that, not even in a past life. And this isn’t an indie game, but a nationwide release, right? What’s the point of broadcasting me to the whole damn country? Oh, and I hate to pick at the small details, but how long are you playing in a single day?” “I make sure to play in a brightly lit area so my eyes don’t get tired, and I only play fifteen hours a day.” “You’re completely nuts!” “Oh, and I’m already thinking about merchandising. Work on the anime adaptation began during the game development. Airing of all twenty-four episodes will start on the fourth next month at one thirty AM on cable. I also want to record some extras for the DVD release, so I would appreciate your help in that.” An odd pain seized Ryouta, and he felt like crying. Ryouta’s power typically only ever had an effect on girls he met in person. Despite his grandfather’s “curse,” it didn’t have the power to make women fall in love with him just by seeing his name. As long as he could keep away from the women around him, he could still somehow manage. But ever since meeting Kiyomizu, things were different. The temple that Kiyomizu’s family owned was super-rich due to some commercial law for prayer or whatever, and they used their financial power to make Ryouta Asagiri merchandise to sell in school. The number of girls targeting him exploded because of that, making it more and more dangerous for him to walk around town on the weekends. “I guess the danger to my virtue is at the national level now…” He was at his wit’s end. Once he got back to Japan, he would have to start thinking about emigrating to another country. “Whatever, I’m out of tears. I want to go back to Japan, so could you tell me if you know the way?” “No, we must spend more precious alone time before you go back.” She produced some sort of pipe and blew into it toward Ryouta. “Ow!” There was a sting on his arm—a needle had pierced his skin. His strength immediately drained away, leaving him completely immobile. “What is…this…?” “A self-defense weapon,” she said lightly. “Why are you walking around with that…? And why did you prick me…?” “Don’t you know already?” Kiyomizu dropped her bag and removed her jacket. There was some kind of small, round paper lantern on her blouse underneath, like something a monk practicing asceticism in the mountains would wear. As she slowly removed the outfit, she revealed a black bra covering her practically flat chest… There was something weird about this! “I’m here for your body, Ryouta… Eh-heh.” She was taking off her own clothes, but her face was red for some reason. Now he remembered! Kiyomizu was the one who was always after him physically! “Calm down, Kiyomizu! There’s crazy bugs and poisonous trees in the mountains. You should cover as much of your skin as possible! And that bra looks really bad on you! You’re fine with just a sports bra!” “Heh-heh-heh, I’ve decided to give up on trying to convince you with orthodox methods, and I knew very well that you would be trying to sneak through. No one will interrupt us here—it’s perfect. We can enjoy our amorous adventure here, alone. It will be just like a Harlequin manga. Not that I’ve ever read any.” She then removed her skirt, then her socks. She was completely in her underwear. “I am a woman who will do what I say. I will take you as my own in my birthday suit. Oh, I should take a picture of you every minute along the way. Click!”