“Don’t give me that crap,” I told him. “Who’d you protect when the fighting was going on?”
“What did you say?!”
“I asked who you protected. I did what I could. I know Carol was harmed, but I did protect her. What about you? Did you do anything besides running around?”
“I wasn’t there! I tried to get into the royal castle!”
Does he think he would’ve made a difference? He thinks he would’ve sensed the poison and stopped Carol from drinking it? Bullshit.
“What about Tellur?” I asked him.
“What...?”
Judging by his reaction to the question, the thought of her hadn’t even crossed his mind until now. His face said, Good question. Where is she?
“Haven’t seen it, have you? Read this.”
I passed him one of the documents I’d shown the Rubes—the contract formed between the witches and the crusaders. Article 4 mentioned Tellur by name. They knew her as the blonde Shanti that had escaped capture during the previous war.
I waited a long time for Dolla to finish reading.
“What happened to Lady Tellur?” His concern for her was evident on his face.
“Oh, so now you care about her? Are you serious?”
“Just tell me.”
I knew he’d want to know.
“They handed her over already. A Kulati spy carried her away overseas. I can’t imagine what they’re doing to her right now.”
“Wha—?! Shit.” Dolla, being an idiot, had already turned heel and was about to run off. I had no idea where he planned to go.
“I lied,” I said, sitting back down. “She’s in this castle.”
My cheek hurt, and it felt like a tooth was loose. I hoped I wouldn’t lose it.
Dolla’s face went blank. “Huh...?”
“Tellur’s home was raided on the night of the assassination. She was captured and confined to the royal castle. Meanwhile, you were lounging in a cell.”
“Why’d you lie?”
“Where were you going to run off to? Did you think you could charge through Kilhina and the Kulati territories until you found her? You don’t even speak Terolish.”
“Tell me why you lied to me!”
Don’t yell at me. “You think you’ve got the right to criticize me?”
Rather than answer the question, Dolla seemed to shrink.
“If she means so much to you that you’d run to her now, then why didn’t you protect her?” I pressed. “I was the one who saved her. Not that I ever attacked the capital for her sake.”
If I hadn’t taken back the capital, Tellur would definitely have been sold by now. After the spy we’d learned about from Jula had been questioned under torture, we’d learned that Tellur was meant to be handed over before the crusade force even arrived. No one could predict what might happen while crusaders were invading the royal capital, so it made sense to move her to a safe place beforehand.
If I’d simply abandoned Tellur to her fate, or if I’d delayed the attack on Sibiak by a few weeks, she might’ve been on a ship sailing across the sea right now.
“I should’ve protected Carol? That’s easy for you to say. All you did was stand back and let everyone else do the work.”
“I stood back...?” he mumbled.
“I know what you’re thinking—no one could’ve guessed that Tellur was in danger or arrived on time to save her, and that there was no way for you to reach Carol.”
Dolla stayed silent and let me continue.
“And yet you’re telling me, ‘Yuri, you should’ve been capable enough to guess what was going on before Carol drank the poison so you could stop her. You should’ve found a way. I’m not smart enough to predict things like that.’”
I must not have been too far off, because Dolla didn’t disagree.
“You’re lucky, Dolla. Tellur survived without a scratch, and you didn’t have to lift a finger. Meanwhile, my wife’s bedridden and can barely eat enough gruel to sustain herself.”
My anger grew as I spoke. It made me want to slam my fist on the table, but I just barely managed to stop myself. I wasn’t going to deal with my rage like an infant.
I didn’t care about Tellur at all. I’d put zero effort into saving her. She’d just happened to be in the room next door when I’d gone looking for Ms. Ether.
“Sorry. It’s true—I’ve got no right to criticize you.”
An earnest apology from Dolla felt so unnatural that it sent a chill down my spine. But it wasn’t the time for apologies, and it wasn’t what I wanted to hear.
I waited, but Dolla didn’t speak again. It seemed he was done criticizing me.
I’ve had enough of him.
“Just go see Tellur. I’ll tell you where Carol is, and you can pay her a visit too. Just make sure any gift you give her isn’t food.”
“All right. I’ll do that.”
“Show him the way,” I told the woman who’d led him to us.
“P-Please follow me.” She looked afraid as she offered to guide Dolla.
The two of them left the room.
Myalo wasn’t pleased with me. “Yuri, you shouldn’t have spoken to Dolla like that. I feel sorry for him.”
“You feel sorry for him? That bastard hit me full force.” I rubbed my cheek. It was still hurting.
“Yes, but you kicked him in a sensitive area.”
“I was careful not to crush anything.”
He’d be in some pain for a while, but I knew his balls would be fine. A cracked tooth, on the other hand, would never heal. False teeth did exist, but they were made using real ones extracted from corpses. The thought alone creeped me out.
“You were? It didn’t look that way.”
That figured. It’s hard to tell when you don’t have any of your own.
I decided to change the subject. “More importantly, we need to provide Ho Company with money for all those guns we’re importing. If we don’t do something, Lyrica’s going to have that lender touching her again.”
Naturally, I didn’t intend to make Ho Company foot the bill for the guns. The kingdom would be paying for them along with the cost of shipping. The accounting involved was tedious, but delaying it wouldn’t be fair to Lyrica.
“As always, you’re a soft touch when women are involved, Yuri.” Myalo spoke like she’d read my mind.
“You’re talking to the man who burned those witches alive.”
I’d gained a reputation among the common people for showing no mercy toward women.
“I mean when it involves a woman who’s on your side,” Myalo corrected herself.
I felt like I was being criticized. “I don’t think I’m soft. I just don’t get angry with women because I know they won’t get violent with me.” Carol did slap me that one time, but that was too long ago to count.
“If you truly consider Carol your wife, then perhaps you should save your kindness for her.”
“That’s what this is about? It’s because I said she’s my wife?”
“N-No... I’m just saying you shouldn’t be too soft. If Lyrica was a man, you wouldn’t feel the same, would you?”
If Lyrica was a man...? Wait, what? Am I supposed to imagine how I’d feel if a male Lyrica got touched up by the moneylender? It was a frightening thought—all the more so when I imagined the fight it could’ve caused. I’d help him out however I could. No one should have to deal with that.
“I’d still want to help, because I know how threatened men feel when another man gets too close. The girls at the Cultural Academy have no idea,” I answered.
“That’s not what I meant. Imagine the lender was a woman.”
“Oh, like an unwanted approach from an old woman? Yeah, I’d just let him handle it on his own.”
“Old woman? No, I didn’t mean... Anyway, the point is you’d handle it differently.”
“Yeah, that’s true.” I’d tell him it was his problem, not mine.
“Which means you’re soft when it comes to women.”
“Maybe. But that’s because there are different attitudes toward men and women’s bodies.”
“No, that’s not what I meant either. Let’s forget it. Lyrica’s case was a bad example.”
What am I missing? “I don’t get what you’re trying to say.”
“I’m saying you don’t always have to go out of your way to be kind to women. Forget it.”
With that, Myalo left the room, seemingly angry at me.
She’s been touchy with me ever since that incident with Luida. I wonder why.