“She killed herself.”
“Oh...” Carol replied while looking downward.
“I went there myself and talked her into it. Despite what she did, I didn’t want her to suffer. I gave her a poison that would make it an easy death. I don’t think she was in much pain at all.”
“Thank you for handling it carefully.”
“Well...she was more than a stranger to me.”
Even now, I wondered why Carla had turned out the way she had. If I’d been kind to her when we’d first met, would things have been different? But it might’ve only heightened her misunderstanding, leading to a deeper resentment when I rejected her later.
Another option would’ve been to marry Carla, but that would’ve been out of the question. I couldn’t have dedicated my life to a woman I didn’t have any love for. Try as I might, I couldn’t think of any better options I could’ve taken.
“Ngh, ngh...” Carol grabbed the sheets tightly as she quietly cried.
I got up from my chair, sat down on the bed, and wrapped my arm around Carol’s shoulders.
“Sorry... Ngh... Why did she...?”
“It was her simple mind that brought the royal family harm. The witches used her against you, but now they’re gone too. They’re all dead. It’s over now.”
As I spoke, I stroked her hair. Gradually, her sobs became softer until she stopped crying.
“Sorry, Yuri. I got you caught up in all this, and now your parents...”
“It’s not your fault.”
I was to blame for that. My happiness came from the people I held dear. I’d been protecting the new continent so that I could keep them safe. The pursuit of happiness had also led me to sleep with Carol. I’d been living for the sake of making myself happy.
But I knew the new continent could never have protected Carol. That’s why I’d decided to fight. Once she’d become pregnant, I’d decided to marry her thinking it would make things more convenient during the fighting.
I hadn’t seen things clearly.
“I won’t lose hope,” I told her. “Not as long as you’re with me.”
“You’re right. I have to give birth to a healthy baby,” Carol said firmly while putting her hand on her swollen stomach.
That wasn’t what I’d meant. My hope came from her. I just want her to live. I don’t need a child. But I didn’t correct her. If the baby gave her the motivation to live, I wasn’t going to disagree.
Now that she’d calmed down, I removed my arm from her shoulders, gently stroking her back with my open palm as I pulled it away.
She’d lost weight. Carol’s shoulders had once been covered with firm muscle thanks to all the training she’d done at the Knight Academy, but they were a little smaller now.
“So what’s happening in the royal capital right now?”
“Myalo is handling everything carefully. No one can deal with witches better than her.”
“Oh, that’s good.”
“I’d be lying if I said we weren’t busy, but I made time today. I’m going to stay here tonight.”
“Really? You don’t have to...” Carol sounded reluctant to agree.
“No, listen. Almost the entire Ho family army is in the royal capital, so we held the funeral there. But the burial...”
“Oh...” Carol guessed what I was talking about—my parents.
Cremation wasn’t a common practice, and a burial couldn’t be put off for too long.
“Yesterday, we held a burial for them alongside former generations of Ho family members. Keep this to yourself, but I buried empty coffins. Their real resting place is going to be near this house.”
“What?!” Carol cried out loudly. That was followed by a brief coughing fit.
I hadn’t meant to surprise her.
“There’s a hill behind the house. We often climbed it together. You can see this house, my father’s ranch, and even some far-off wheat fields from there.”
It was a place that Rook had made for Suzuya. He’d been able to ride an eagle and enjoy amazing views anytime, but that had meant leaving Suzuya at home.
For that reason, he’d climbed the hills surrounding his ranch, found a spot with a beautiful view of our home, and made a clearing in the trees. He’d even created a path so that the journey there would always be easy. He’d done it all before I’d been born. We’d often gone there for family picnics during my childhood.
“Father never got his knight medal, and mom wasn’t from a noble family. I just couldn’t put them in Ho family graves. I’m going to bury them on that hill.”
It was my decision. Without consulting anyone, I’d ordered two coffins from a coffin maker in Kalakumo, then secretly switched them for my parents’ coffins to be buried in their place. I’d feigned calmness as I’d loaded the real ones into a carriage ready to meet up with trusted men from Ho Company. I’d driven the carriage myself on the way here.
The men had no idea this was my former home. I’d told them they were digging a grave for friends I’d lost in the recent battle. Right now, they were likely starting on the hole.
“Then the luggage you brought...”
“Mm. I’d rather not say it.”
There were two bodies in the carriage visible from the room’s window.
“I see...”
“I’ll be heading out for a while. I should be back in time for dinner.”
I wanted to finish this today. Burying bodies deep enough to prevent wolves or wild dogs from digging them back up required backbreaking labor from at least three people.
“All right. Well, please give my regards to my late mother- and father-in-law.”
“I will.”
With that, I left the room.
✧✧✧
“Phew. This ought to do it.”
“Yeah, I think so.”
The two company employees and I were covered in sweat and mud after digging a hole wide enough for two coffins to rest side by side. We’d reached the point where the grass was at eye level. Since the hole’s depth almost matched my height, we decided we’d done enough.
We climbed out using the slope we’d made, then the three of us unloaded the coffins from the narrow carriage that had been designed to be drawn by a single horse.
“Take it slow,” I instructed. “Don’t drop it.”
We slowly lowered Rook’s coffin down, then placed Suzuya’s coffin beside it. Finally, we climbed out of the hole.
“This is good. Let’s fill it in.”
I picked up a shovel and began replacing the soil. It had taken us so long to make the hole that the sun was already setting.
“We’ll have a lot of soil left over,” one of the employees said.
“Let’s pile it up on top,” I replied. “It’ll sink down later.”
I didn’t know the general procedure for burying someone. I considered compacting the soil under our boots, but I didn’t want to stomp repeatedly on my parents’ grave. Instead, I decided I’d remove any extra dirt the next time I came here if it hadn’t flattened out by itself.
“Are we finished now?” an employee asked.
“Yeah. You can head back. Good work.”
I’d paid them well for this job—enough that they’d be able to find an inn and enjoy some fine alcohol afterward.
Before walking away, both employees stood in front of the grave and prayed to offer their respects.
“We’ll take the carriage back with us,” one said.
“Yeah, please do.”
As we’d arranged, the two men left with the horse and carriage.
I remained, taking in the beautiful view until the sun had almost set. It was nice to enjoy the peaceful scenery like this.
It was just the three of us here. Without no one around to hear me, I began talking to Rook. “What do you think, dad? I figured you’d find it more comfortable. I know you always got a little bored here, but the view’s way better than at the burial ground. And I figured you’d find that burial ground too stuffy, mom. I remembered how you always cheered up when dad used to take time off to bring us here.”
The tears began to flow unabated. No one could see me. I was alone here.
“My first mom walked out on me, and my dad was a terrible father...but you two raised me and showed me love. It made me realize what real parents are like, but I never knew how to be your son... You were finally going to have a real child, but then I ruined everything... Mom, how can I ever make it up to you?”
The people I was apologizing to were already at rest in the ground. How did it all turn out like this?
“I’m sorry...”
No matter how much I apologized, it wouldn’t be enough. But I had to let them know how I felt.
The tears streamed down as I continuously apologized in my head. It continued on for so long that I lost track of time. The sun was falling, and it would soon grow dark.
“I’ll be back soon to bring your tombstone.”
I left the grave and got onto my horse. Carol was waiting for me.