When at long last, Nelly arrived at her destination, what awaited her far surpassed her imagination. She had never seen buildings so tall. According to the deacon, people from other nations considered their homeland to be dangerous and impoverished. By contrast, the Lindsays’ region was peaceful and wealthy.
The staff told her and the other refugees that their lives would be cramped and difficult in the short term, but eventually, each family would get their own house. She could hardly believe her ears.
I thought they would work us to the bone and then sell us off somewhere.
The saint had spoken in their defense, yes, but Nelly hadn’t necessarily believed it would have any effect.
When she heard the Partean mercenaries were leaving, her anxiety threatened to swallow her whole. What guarantee was there that bandits wouldn’t attack? The local director had promised her they were safe, but she only trusted the deacon. Most kept their silence when the local staff made inquiries about what they needed. There was no telling what demands these people would make of them in return.
Yet for all her doubts, she was starting to relax more and more as the days went on. Her children were eager to go outside and play. She couldn’t let them go without supervision, so despite the cold, she set out with them. Soon enough, she found herself naturally forming relationships with the other mothers.
“What will happen to us now?”
That was all their conversations swirled around, though they also complained and vented about their daily stressors. Some of the women voiced their discomfort about the men who leered at them as they came and went from the housing construction site. Even the male refugees who had managed to dodge the draft back home made the women uneasy.
“If anything happened to my children, I couldn’t keep going!”
“Let’s look after each other.”
As long as they stayed together, the men couldn’t do anything. They warned their children to be vigilant too.
Then one day came the announcement that some high-ranking nobles were coming to inspect the area and see how the refugees were doing.
Nelly was scared.
According to the saint, these higher-ups had a duty to support and provide for the refugees without compensation. But Nelly knew better. There was no such thing as unconditional goodwill. She hugged her children close, knowing that soon the day would come when something would be demanded of them.
While she and the other mothers were bracing themselves, Deacon Smit reached out to her. His hair was peppered with gray, his skin sun-kissed, and his body thick and muscled. Smit was a comforting presence, and he had been a pillar of strength for everyone along the way.
“If you’re afraid, you should pray. These people won’t do anything to you if you pray,” he told her.
Nelly believed him. And so, on the day the higher-ups came, she prayed. She did her best to avoid their eyes and waited for the storm to pass.
Alas, her prayers went unanswered. One of the higher-ups was the duke’s daughter, and she summoned Nelly, of all people.
The deacon lied to me! She cursed him in her heart as she prostrated herself on the floor. Nelly protested that she hadn’t meant to offend the duke’s daughter, and her children were blameless. They deserved to be spared.
When the duke’s daughter responded, Nelly was blown away. The lady had apologized to her. Her clear, graceful tone coaxed Nelly to lift her head. Before she knew it, the duke’s daughter—an absolutely gorgeous woman—was right beside her. The woman’s hands were so warm as they covered Nelly’s grimy ones. All the tension left Nelly’s body as the noblewoman’s kindness enveloped her.
“You must have felt so hopeless,” said the woman.
In the conversation that followed, the beautiful woman accurately assessed Nelly’s personality and guessed all the anxieties that had been weighing on her. Nelly was left gaping, flapping her mouth like a fish.
Maybe this woman isn’t actually human, she thought. It would make sense if she wasn’t. This woman’s skin was too soft, her eyes were like gemstones, and her hair resembled the finest black silk. Nelly struggled to believe she could be of this world, especially since she’d read her so easily.
Oh goodness, she may have heard me cursing the deacon in my head. Nelly suddenly felt guilty.
Not even one of the faithful could have predicted what this beautiful creature would do. The woman was so out of the ordinary, so supernatural that it triggered a strong defiance in Nelly. If she couldn’t hide anything from this woman anyway, then she might as well unload her every thought.
At the same time, the warmth of the woman’s hands on hers provided a sense of relief. The way she sat, knees turned and pressed against Nelly’s, made Nelly feel like the duke’s daughter was opening up to her, not the other way around. Thus, Nelly began answering all the questions she’d been asked. No matter how childlike her responses were, the woman never pulled a face or wrinkled her nose. She listened with empathy. When Nelly finished confiding everything, her heart was so much lighter that she burst into tears.
Her scalp was covered in dandruff, her skin dark with grime. And though Nelly was desensitized to it, she knew she gave off a pungent odor. No ordinary person would give her a second glance, of that she was certain. But this woman had.
“Of course it was hard,” the duke’s daughter had told her. “You’ve been so brave. Anyone would be at their breaking point after traveling all this way with two children. But you made it. You are an incredible mother. It’s all right—your children know that too.” She met Nelly’s eyes without a hint of hesitation or disgust, as if she saw her. Truly saw her and understood.
Ah. She actually wants to know…how much I suffered, how difficult it was. She’s treating me like a normal person.
When the woman wrapped Nelly in her arms and tucked her against her chest, Nelly wept. Only after Nelly’s tears subsided did the woman dampen a cloth and dab her puffy eyes. Nelly felt like she could breathe again, truly breathe. Still, ashamed she’d been so pitiful in front of the duke’s daughter, she apologized and lowered her head.
“Not at all. But, hmm. If you ever feel like you owe me, can I ask a favor?”
“Certainly, what is it?”
“Would you mind lending a hand if you see someone in need? It can even be someone close to you. Doesn’t need to be a stranger.”
Nelly’s jaw hung open, and for a moment, she just stared. “But that won’t benefit you at all, will it?”
“Strangely enough, it will. Good deeds have a way of paying off. If you help someone else, it will eventually come back to me.”
Nelly nodded, convinced. This woman saw the world from a very different perspective—and if she said this is how the world worked, who was Nelly to gainsay her?
As soon as Nelly’s meeting with the beautiful woman ended, one of the other female refugees was summoned. When the noblewoman’s facility visit was over, Nelly watched her leave. Smit was standing nearby, and she couldn’t help but ask him whether today’s events had been a mass hallucination.
“No, this is reality,” he assured her. “And she didn’t do anything to you, did she?”
It was then that Nelly realized he hadn’t lied to her at all. If he was telling the truth now as well, then the lingering warmth she felt on her hands was real. Her heart swelled. As her breath spilled out in a visible puff, she realized something. Studying the deacon’s bronze face in profile, she noticed his exhaustion. But of course, he had suffered right along with them on this long voyage. Perhaps he was worse off, considering he’d stayed with the sick and injured for their entire trip. He had more gray hairs now. Why hadn’t she seen it sooner?
“Um, Deacon Smit, aren’t you worn-out?”
“Oh? Have you recovered enough to start worrying about others? I’m fine.” He smiled at her, but the dark circles beneath his eyes caught her attention. Smit seemed to realize he hadn’t quieted her concerns at all because he added, “I’ve been a bit too excited to get enough sleep, that’s all. Nothing is more reassuring than seeing the others recover their spirits like you have, though.”
Nelly nodded. That made sense. She had been numb to others and their troubles because she’d been too stressed out about her own. She respected Smit even more because he had been compassionate despite being in the same situation. Never had she been so sure that the clergy, Smit included, were different from ordinary people like herself.
“You’re incredible,” she told him. “We haven’t been a burden to you, have we?”
“You wound me. I’m glad to be the one all of you can depend on most. It brings me joy to serve you. So please, don’t hesitate to look to me for comfort if you need it.”
“Thank you for everything you do for us.” As grateful as she was, his obvious fatigue made her pray that restful sleep would come to him as soon as possible.