Kei sure knows a lot about old-timey thieves.
“Of course, I just heard the stories about our ancestors from Granddad,” Dad went on. “I don’t know if it’s true. But it is true that most people in our family are phantom thieves. And when children turn thirteen, tradition says they have to join the family business.”
“This is all so sudden…and I’m still only twelve,” I said.
“You’re turning thirteen this year, aren’t you?” Dad countered.
Yeah, but shouldn’t we do it right?
“Oh, and if you are going to take up the mantle, can you keep the name Phantom Thief Red? Your uncle and I came up with that. Once you’re all settled, we’re officially retiring.”
“Hold on now, this isn’t about whether we take on your name or when you get to retire! Ugh, my head’s a mess!”
“Yes, it’s hardly a logical argument,” Kei pointed out. “Anyway, even if I can do it…”
He glanced at me.
What’s that supposed to mean? That I’m not phantom thief material?
I was about to complain, but then I realized it might be better not to work in the thief business and shut my mouth.
“She’ll be fine, Kei,” Dad said. He sounded awfully confident. “Asuka, how high can you climb on the outside of a building without using rope?”
“A building? Um…to the seventeenth story. No, wait, I think I can get to the twentieth now.”
Uncle K and Kei stared at me. What, was that weird?
“…Tsuba, what crazy things have you been teaching your daughter?” Uncle K asked Dad, then sighed.
“What? Climbing walls is a necessary skill!” Dad answered.
“You’re not wrong…”
“W-w-wait one second!” I interrupted.
Uncle K seemed convinced, but I was not.
“Were you training me for this without even telling me?”
When I thought back on it, I realized he’d been doing this stuff since I was little. He’d had me running 10Ks every morning, climbing walls, getting out of rope ties, and picking locks. He taught me plenty of other things a normal dad wouldn’t teach his daughter, too. I’d always known we were a little different from other people. But I never dreamed he was training me in the art of breaking and entering!
“I guess you could say that, but thanks to me, you’ll be able to take over as Phantom Thief Red starting tomorrow without a hitch! No complaints, right?”
“Wrong!” I shouted back.
“Oh, calm down. Anyway, what about you, Kei? Don’t you want to give it a try?” Dad asked, ignoring me.
I assumed he would say no, but he just nodded.
“I’m willing to do it.”
“Wait, what? Really?” I asked. I couldn’t believe my ears.
“If it’s been the family business for generations, I can’t really avoid it.”
Come on, don’t you have a spine?
“So it’s just ’cause you can’t avoid it? Don’t you think he should be a little more enthusiastic, Dad?”
“Nah, he’s fine.”
But, but…
“What about you, Asuka? Do you not want to do it?”
“M-m-me?” I hesitated. “Um, well, I wouldn’t say I’m not interested, but…”
I was surprised at first, but that didn’t mean I wanted to give a hard no. And Phantom Thief Red didn’t seem like a villain.
“Great! So it’s decided!” Dad said, slapping his knee.
“Hey, I didn’t say yes yet…”
“Now that you’ve agreed, we’d better find you some work. Something fitting for your debut. Keiichi?”
“…All right. Give me two or three days.”
“Hear that? For now, we’ll give you the assignments—who to rob and what to take. Oh, and one more thing, Asuka.”
“…What?” I asked. It was no use arguing anymore.
“Starting today, your uncle and cousin are going to live with us. Be nice to them, okay?”
“Thank you for sharing your home with us, Asuka,” Uncle K said, smiling.
Live with us? Both of them?
“Whaaaaaat?!”
And that was how Kei and I became Phantom Thief Red.