Halpha.
If you asked anyone at school who they were most afraid of, this was the name they’d utter. Halpha was aggressive, cut-throat, and cold blooded, but he went about his violence with a smile plastered to his face. His magical eye abilities could shut down almost any mage. Almost everyone who faced him left with their spirits crushed.
And now, for reasons I could not fully comprehend, I was walking side by side with him. We’d met on a few occasions, but I’d almost never talked to him face to face before.
“I can’t tell you how long it’s been since I’ve had company for the trip home,” said Halpha.
So why are we walking home together?
Halpha turned to me with a smile as I grappled with my inner turmoil.
“Something wrong?” he asked.
“Er, no . . . but, um, sorry. Your smile is terrifying.”
It wasn’t as scary as Usato’s was, but it was still a unique kind of frightening. Halpha looked taken aback for a moment but quickly relaxed into an easier smile.
“That means I failed,” he said. “Hm. So that smile was no good, huh? And I’ve been trying so hard to put people at ease with it. It’s so unfortunate that it hasn’t been working.”
“That was your attempt at a smile?!” I said, mystified.
But your eyes were ice cold the whole time! If anything, you looked like you were scheming something! I’ll give you full marks for trying to look shady!
Halpha chuckled. He seemed to enjoy my reaction. This confused me greatly.
“You aren’t scared of me,” stated Halpha plainly.
I gasped.
Until recently, I’d been so petrified of Halpha that I avoided being anywhere near him at all times. But now things were different—even though I was scared of him, I could talk to him like I would anyone else.
“I suppose it’s because I met someone even scarier,” I replied.
“You mean Usato?”
“Yeah. Compared to him, you’re fine.”
When Usato was in training mode, his expression and the way he spoke to me was so scary that it scraped away at my very soul. Now that I’d spent three days with that side of him, everything else was totally bearable.
“But I have to ask,” I said. “Why are you walking with me, Halpha?”
Halpha put a finger to his jaw for a few moments before answering.
“I just feel like it,” he stated.
This was not the answer I was expecting. Astonishment was written all over me.
“But if you pushed me for more of an answer,” he continued, “it’s because I wanted the chance to talk to you.”
“Me? But outside of Usato, there’s nothing interesting about me at all.”
“But this is enjoyable for me,” said Halpha. “It’s been so long since I could just talk to someone without them being petrified or otherwise feeling something spiteful or hateful toward me.”
“Oh, I uh, I see.”
I felt like Halpha’s words gave me a tiny glimpse into his life. It was no wonder people were scared of him—in battle he was utterly merciless with more than enough power to back it up. And yet, that also meant that life at school for him was, in some ways, very lonely.
Huh?! What is this feeling?!
Halpha was the strongest person in the entire school, while I was just a healer who, until very recently, had spent his entire life here getting bullied. And yet, all the same, here I was feeling something like a kinship between us, but our positions couldn’t have been farther apart.
“Erm, I still have some time,” I said, “so why don’t we talk for a bit?”
Halpha’s eyes went wide with curiosity, but when they met with my own, he burst into a grin.
“I would like that very much,” he replied.
And so, Halpha and I ventured into a somewhat awkward attempt at everyday conversation. The more we talked, the more I realized that Halpha was more human than people gave him credit for. Sure, he was a little overly aggressive and his smile was terrifying. His words always felt like they hid a deeper and more mysterious meaning, but inside he hurt just like the rest of us.
“I see,” said Halpha. “So you’re leaving rather soon then?”
“That’s right,” I replied.
I’d just finished telling him about my plans to join the rescue team. Halpha nodded, impressed.
“I must say,” he said, “it’s so very exciting to think that someday you might be just as powerful as Usato.”
Whoa! He’s got super-high expectations!
While it always hurt to have people say negative things about you, now I was realizing that when truly strong people like Halpha put their hopes in you, that too came with its own extremely heavy weight.
“Do you hope to one day work as a member of the rescue team?” asked Halpha.
“Yes. But, of course, I have to prove I’m good enough to join them first.”
“While I’d love to tell you you’re already strong enough, all I have to go on is Usato’s example. If he’s the baseline, becoming a full-fledged member may be quite the challenge.”
“Yeah, I guess I really won’t know until I’m there.”
Usato himself had said I’d have no trouble getting in. He’d said that to cheer me up, but if I really didn’t make it into the team, I’d feel awful. The thought of it made my shoulders slump. I let out a dejected sigh. Halpha saw the look on my face, and he looked worried as he covered his eyes with his hands.
“Oh my, I made you worry, didn’t I?” he said. “It’s times like this that I so hate the way I comment on things so heartlessly.”
“It’s fine. It’s the truth. And, also, I’m not too worried about it.”
Halpha hadn’t said anything wrong. I really didn’t know yet if I had what it took to join the rescue team. Even with Usato’s seal of approval, if I messed up at some point, that would mean no rescue team for me.
Usato had helped me to better learn healing magic, and through his training I’d improved my physical abilities. From here on out, the rest was up to me. And I would make sure, come hell or high water, that I would live up to Usato’s expectations.
Without thinking, my right hand scrunched up into a fist—a manifestation of my will.
Halpha chuckled at the sight.
“It looks like I underestimated you, Nack,” he said.
“Really?”
“Yes. I can see it in you. You’re many times stronger than you once were.”
I felt suddenly bashful to hear such a compliment from one so strong. I scratched the back of my head while Halpha took a step forward out in front of me.
“You’ve spent all this time talking to me about yourself, but a one-sided conversation isn’t particularly fair, is it? Allow me to talk about myself a little.”
“You’re going to tell me about yourself?”
“Indeed.”
Halpha’s purple eyes lit up as he turned to face me. It was his magical sight, a magic within the rare field of magical eyes. It allowed him to see one’s powers and the flow of their magical energy. It frightened me a little to be on the other end of it, but all the same, I stood tall and held Halpha’s gaze.
“I’ve been able to see the flow of magic in people since I was quite young,” said Halpha.
“So, from when you were about seven or eight?”
That was about the time at which people awakened to their magical abilities. However, in answer to my question, Halpha shook his head.
“No, I was far younger than that. I’ve had this magic since as far back as I can remember. Back then, I was enamored by the idea of fighting with magic. Launching fireballs and lightning bolts from your hands, crafting ice—that was what I looked up to. However, I was left cursing fate for the magical eyes it gave me.”
I understood his feelings. I understood them so well that it hurt. Your magic type was something you were born with—it was a reality that you simply had to accept because it was impossible to change, no matter how much you struggled. Just like Halpha with his magical eyes, I too had once hated my healing magic.
“So what happened next?” I asked.
“Well, I knew that getting mad about it was pointless, so I just accepted the situation.”
“That’s pretty straightforward.”
“I’ve never been one to get hung up on things,” said Halpha plainly. “Once I accepted that I was stuck with my eyes, all I could think about was how I could use them to fight. That was pretty much my childhood in a nutshell.”
“That’s a uh . . . terrifying thought,” I said.
I didn’t have any other words—Halpha must have been incredibly strong willed as a child. But I felt like I understood now why he had developed into the person he had.
“And then you came to Luqvist?” I asked.
“Yes. There’s so much magic here of all different kinds. I thought the place would give me some insights,” Halpha said, looking down at his hands. “However, in the end, I couldn’t find what I was looking for here.”
There was something about his words—they echoed with a certain futility.
“The people here didn’t agree with my opinions. They attempted to convince me otherwise. They said things like, ‘magical eyes can’t be used in battle’, and told me to find more helpful ways to put my magic to use.”
“But you couldn’t let go of what you believed, could you?”
“Nope. They talked and they reasoned and they admonished me, but it didn’t matter—I wasn’t the kind of meek and obedient kid who would just follow their orders.”
He spoke the words with a smile, but there was such animosity in Halpha’s comment that I couldn’t help flinching in response. I got the strong impression that Halpha was the sort of person who spoke his mind openly and that he’d been like that for a long time.
“So I stopped asking the people around me for their opinions,” continued Halpha. “As such, this school is no longer a place where I undertake instruction but rather a place I can use to strengthen my own skills.”
“Uh-huh . . .”
I could see how things had grown from there. Now the reason that Halpha was so feared among the students was crystal clear.
“Where there’s a will, there’s a way,” said Halpha. “In my case, all I could see was the flow of magical energy, so I taught myself how to use that for battle. As a result, I developed my own unique fighting style—one in which I lock my opponents down by perfectly reading their movements.”
That’s just not normal, if you ask me . . .
I wasn’t going to say that to Halpha’s face, but who could have even imagined that? Who could have thought that he’d develop his magical eyes into a murderous technique that was perfect against magic users? I had a feeling that Halpha put his classmates at the time through something not unlike a unique hell.