“So much for that buried treasure.”
An enormous explosion had gone off in a cramped subterranean space. It would have blown up everything—coins, jewels, and criminal evidence.
“Ah…ah…”
Harrison fell to his knees in shock. He looked like he’d just aged an entire decade. Belatedly, the Paladins came over to take him into custody. He did not resist.
A cold wind blew through the area. Arwin sheathed her sword and walked over to me.
“We’re saved,” she said, smiling with relief.
“Thank the squirt for that one, not me. But first…”
April was sitting on the ground before the smoking black hole. She seemed to be too stunned to stand up. I clonked her on the skull with my fist.
“What was that for?!” she protested. Arwin looked panicked. But I wasn’t going to let this one slide.
“I told you not to be reckless. You could have easily died doing that.”
“But if I hadn’t—”
“You didn’t need to be the hero. The princess knight behind you would have solved that problem.”
It wasn’t my style to force kids to put their lives on the line.
“…I’m sorry.”
“Save your apologies for the old man—once you’ve had your spanking and written fifty apology essays.”
“You sound like a teacher, Matthew.”
“I teach by example,” I said. I was the adult they should make sure not to imitate.
“Well done there,” said Vincent as he approached. “It destroyed the fortune, but this whole affair has been far too public for the Devil’s Alliance. They’ll suffer greatly for it. You have my thanks for the help.”
“……”
“Gregory should be released soon. It’s not wise to keep him locked up past this, given the circumstances.”
“I see.”
I punched Vincent in the face.
It was cloudy out. The most it did was stagger him a bit, but it was enough to shock him. Mustache and Tan promptly grabbed me by the arms and threw me to the ground. They did the job well, but not fast enough. If it were the old me, Vincent would be dead. He wouldn’t be able to look down at me in confused consternation like that.
“What was that for…?”
“For using innocent people as bait on your lure,” I spat, with my face pressed to the dirt.
Arwin froze awkwardly in the act of rushing over. Wide-eyed, April held her breath.
The timing of Vincent’s arrival was too convenient. He must have been keeping tabs on Harrison and his men, and therefore, he could have saved us earlier. Instead, he used us as bait to recover the hidden treasure and arrest Harrison and his men. He’d put April in danger. Who wouldn’t want to slug him in the face?
He should have been grateful I hadn’t done worse. If the old man were there, he’d have beaten Vincent until his eyes flew out of their sockets.
“You’re free to pursue creative means, but if you don’t watch what you do, you’re just a villain. Always keep your goal and your means in mind, and don’t get them mixed, Commander.”
Vincent was free to be self-righteous, but if he was going to hurt the people I cared about, I wasn’t inclined to show him any mercy. Even a degenerate had his limits. I wasn’t so mature that I’d let myself be pushed around forever without a fight.
“Um, please, sir,” said April, clinging to Vincent’s sleeve. “Matthew is a fool and a lecher and an incorrigible man, but he’s also good…or at least, something similar to good, but definitely not bad, per se…”
“Sorry, Arwin, can you take over for her?” I asked. I couldn’t listen to this anymore.
“Hey, I’m trying to help you!”
“You’re not defending me; you’re delivering a critique.” If anything, it would have the opposite effect.
“…Let him go,” said Vincent, rubbing his cheek. Mustache and Tan unhanded me, so I got to my feet.
“Don’t push your luck,” Arwin said, punching me, too, while April kicked at my shins. It wasn’t fair, but it was all right. Being mocked as a fool was a normal daily ritual for me, and at that point, I should have welcomed a return to normalcy. Let some naive boy be the hero who saves innocent girls.
“I’m exhausted. I just want to go home. You go on and get your reward bone from His Majesty, doggie.”
“Wait,” said Vincent. I turned back and got a look at his usual cold, even-tempered countenance. “Take out what you’re hiding,” he demanded.
He confiscated a ruby ring from my pants pocket, a gold coin hidden under the sole of my shoe, and a small jewel I’d stuck into my ear.
“When did you…?” Arwin asked, aghast. What can I say? There was treasure all around me. Of course I took everything I could.
They ended up stripping me naked. Though it wasn’t for anyone else to know, all that touching around my naughty parts got me feeling a certain way. They even turned my clothes inside out to search them.
“Treat them carefully, now. You can’t replace those with your paychecks.”
I’d gotten the whole set at a used clothing store, so I’d never find the like again.
Dez also got searched. He looked grumpy from start to finish. The sense of danger that emanated from him at all moments intimidated the Paladins, but they even managed to search between his beard and hair.
“Just put up with it, I’m begging you,” I repeated over and over. If Dez snapped and lost his temper, someone was going to die.
By the time they released us, the sun was going down.
“They took everything,” I lamented, sighing.
“It was ill-gotten money. You thought you could just skim off the top of stolen coins?” Arwin pointed out quite correctly. I had no response. Even April was giving me nasty looks.
“Come, we’ve got a lot to talk about. Let’s go home.”
“Not so fast,” I said, clapping Dez on the shoulder. “Sorry, you’ll have to go ahead without me. Dez needs me for something. He wants me to return the money I borrowed most recently. Right?”
“……”
Dez nodded without a word.
“…Then I’ll see you there,” Arwin said, disappointed, and took April away.
“All right, let’s get going… Yes, yes, I know. Don’t give me that look,” I told Dez. We went to his private room at the Adventurers Guild building and sat facing each other in his little chairs. I made sure no one was listening in before I could finally relax.
“Okay, go ahead,” I signaled. Dez reached into his mouth and pulled out a soggy piece of paper. Drool dripped and splashed on the table.
“That’s nasty.”
“You stuck it in there!” he growled, smashing my head into the table.
“Don’t be angry. It was the only option.”
I had a feeling this would happen when Vincent showed up. I’d pulled the rod out of the scroll and folded up the paper, then shoved it into Dez’s mouth just before Vincent approached. I knew he was going to have me searched, and given my reputation as a wisecracker, it wasn’t an option for me to remain silent, because it would tip him off that something was wrong. But Dez was known for being reticent and ornery, so no one would suspect him of hiding a secret. At times like that, one needed to lean on their nature.
“…After all that ruckus about a hidden treasure, the only thing we ended up with is a single scroll,” he grumbled, wiping off the saliva so he could examine the scroll. “What’s locked in here…a gulon?”
That was a kind of badger with black-and-brown fur. It ate so much that, if left unchecked, it could clear an entire mountainside. The bigger ones could get to the size of houses, but that made them slow, too. They were also timid and tame, so they were easy to defeat. At most, they were two-star monsters.
The strength of a monster was directly reflected in the market value of a scroll. This might earn us twenty or thirty gold at best.
“We’re in the red.”
“Not quite,” I said, smirking. “Just follow my lead.”
That night, I slipped out of Arwin’s house and made my way to a subterranean tunnel beneath the town. Dez was already waiting for me with an annoyed look on his face. He had a short-handled ax for his weapon. That was Number 16. Dez used it like a short sword, but to the victims of his terror, it was no different from a battle-ax.
“You’re late,” he said.
“Sorry. Took me a little time to sneak out.”
Arwin just wouldn’t let me go, the selfish girl.
“Go on and get started,” I said.
Dez closed his eyes and unfurled the scroll. Anyone could summon a monster. The symbol on the scroll glowed faintly, and in moments a giant badger appeared. It was definitely a gulon. It began to lift itself up, breath stinking of metal, but stopped; its head had hit the ceiling of the tunnel.
“Do it.”
“Don’t order me around,” Dez grumbled, lumbering over on his short legs and hopping onto the gulon’s body. It didn’t even notice that Dez was climbing up and grabbing its fur. That was for the best. When he reached the gulon’s throat, he slashed it with Number 16, as though hammering in a nail. One blow was all it took to sever the vital point. The gulon toppled backward without a sound.
“All right, please take it away, beloved and eternal best friend, benevolent father, and faithful husband, Lord Dez,” I announced. My reward for singing his praises was Number 16’s pole to my gut.
“Creep,” he muttered.
Was it something I said?
He began to carve open the gulon’s stomach. Suddenly his eyes went wide. I could feel the laughter bubbling up from inside me.
“Jackpot.”
Riches spilled out of the creature’s belly.
The moment we found that hidden fortune underground, I knew something was wrong. They said it was a million gold pieces—and that was not a million. There had to be more hidden somewhere, but every other possible location had been picked over. So I thought back to what happened during the stampede. Living monsters appeared from inside the lindworm, and it had been summoned by a scroll. I realized someone could fit whatever they wanted inside a scroll.
There were other monsters sealed in scrolls, but the only one that seemed capable of fitting a ton into its stomach was this one. The best place to hide a tree is in the forest.