Or rather, it could be more accurate to say the thought ran through him like an electric current.
Maybe—
Suppressing the urge to jump out of bed, he left his cheeks pressed against Shino’s broad chest and opened his eyes wide in the dark.
Maybe…there is something I can do now, after all—not that I can brag about it, since it’s for my sake.
Even so, the possibility that he could break out of his uselessness was a great hope for him.
Yeah. I’d forgotten about it since I didn’t think it would ever happen.
Masamichi hadn’t told Shino every detail about his exchange with Kagiroi when the specter attacked him at the park.
It wasn’t as if he’d tried to keep a secret from his master, but he had been convinced that Shino would be extremely displeased, and for that reason, he hadn’t been able to mention it. It was something that Masamichi could never accept, which was why he had quickly pushed it out of his mind.
But the memory had remained firmly in his brain and suddenly resurfaced.
It was strange that something that disgusted him with all his heart had now become a thin thread of hope for Masamichi.
Maybe it’s a good thing I didn’t tell Shino about it. If I had, he would have stopped me from taking action, and he might not have told me about how tired he is tonight.
But now that he had remembered it, he felt he had to act. That was the only way for him to make amends for himself…and—
I’m sorry, Shino. I think I’ll probably cause trouble for you again, but I’d like to give this a try. You told me before that I should open up my path with my own will.
There was no point in apologizing in advance, but Masamichi did so anyway. Silently, in his mind.
His heart was beating faster now that he knew there was one thing that he could do that seemed worth doing.
But Shino might notice that he was up to something if he kept thinking about it.
Calm down. Be quiet, my heart. For now, I’ll focus on sending good chi to Shino.
Telling himself that, Masamichi raised his body a bit and gazed at Shino’s face.
It was beautiful, as always. Here, in the dark, it looked like a marble sculpture, though it bothered him to see the deep crease between his eyebrows, which showed he was in pain.
“…Good night,” Masamichi whispered, then gathered up his courage and stretched out his short arms. Then with the tip of his index finger, he gently stroked the crease in his master’s brow.
Without moving a single strand of hair, Shino asked, “What are you doing?”
“I’m willing you to sleep tight.”
He expected Shino to scold him for being silly. But to his surprise, Shino opened his eyes halfway and said with a wry smile, “How presumptuous of you. You’re just a servant, and you dare cast a spell on your master?”
“It’s not a spell. I’m only willing you to sleep peacefully.”
“That’s the same thing. Humans interpret and classify such acts in any way they like; that’s all. But…it isn’t bad. Sweet chi is flowing into me through your fingertips.”
With that, Shino closed his eyes again. When Masamichi lifted his fingertips, the creases in his brow looked a little shallower.
He didn’t push my fingers off him, so I guess that means it’s okay to keep touching him. In fact, it’s probably better to keep touching him.
But it was tough to keep touching Shino in his current position, so Masamichi moved his head up a little and slid his hand down to Shino’s neck.
Masamichi could leave his hand there without straining. However, it was an area that he wouldn’t usually touch, and when he thought about it, he started feeling a little nervous.
It feels special to touch someone’s neck. Even family members don’t touch one another’s necks like this, and it’s as if we’re…we’re…l-lovers…though, of course, my imagination is carrying me away.
Masamichi recalled Shino’s naked body and blushed.
He had now become well enough to bathe by himself within a safe range, but that first night, Shino had bathed with him.
Although they both had male bodies, which should have been the same structurally, Shino’s porcelain skin didn’t have a single mole and his beautifully well-proportioned body came to mind. Masamichi felt his heart flutter for reasons he couldn’t understand.
“What is it?” Shino asked suspiciously. “The moment your hand touched there, your chi suddenly became sweeter. What are you thinking?”
Masamichi shook his head in a panic and banished the sight of Shino’s naked body from his mind.
“Nothing! Um, I’m glad my chi tastes better now. Good night!”
“…? Well, whatever,” Shino said dismissively and fell silent.
Shino had been breathing so quietly in the first place that Masamichi couldn’t tell if he was asleep or not.
Still, he was sure Shino needed rest and did not attempt to continue talking to him.
His current position certainly wasn’t what he would say was comfortable, but if Shino was going to sleep this way, then there was no way that he wouldn’t go along with it.
However, the room wasn’t heated, and Shino had no body heat, so Masamichi’s tiny body would surely freeze over in no time.
“Excuse me for a moment.”
He grabbed Shino’s long coat, which was fortunately lying on the floor nearby, and wrapped it around his body. It also covered Shino’s torso as a result.
The high-quality cashmere was soft, lightweight, and very warm. He could now sleep without catching a cold.
This might turn out to be the last time that I can give Shino my chi. But if I don’t do the one thing that I can do and keep waiting for Shino or Mr. Hayakawa to help me, then I’ll be no different from the failure I’ve always been. I’m scared, but I want to be brave and take a step forward. Shino… I’m sorry.
Masamichi wouldn’t have been surprised if he was trembling with fear, but for some reason, what felt like a fighting spirit that he’d never before experienced seemed to be burning slowly inside his heart.
It was a first for him, so he didn’t know if it was good or bad.
But he was definitely taking a step forward. With firm resolve, Masamichi lay quietly as he continued to feel the cool touch of Shino’s neck against his hand.
It was just past six PM the next day.
“Well then, I shall be on my way,” Hayakawa said after eating dinner with Masamichi at Bougyoudou and tidying up with him. “This evening, Mr. Tatsumi should be returning soon. He notified me a little while ago that he had finished taking care of the case I’d requested.”
Masamichi went down the stairs and saw him off at the door.
“I’ll be back again tomorrow. Please text me if you think of anything you would like to eat.”
Masamichi nodded with a smile and a hint of sadness.